Act of Remembrance
by dublin writer
Summary: This is a story I wrote set one year after a sad event in Steve's life based on a season one episode and how Mike and Steve both deal with the emotional aftermath. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it! Disclaimer: I do not own the SOSF characters. They belong to their creators. Any mention of characters from original episodes are merely borrowed by me.
1. Chapter 1

**Act of Remembrance**

**A/N: Thank you to all those who have read and reviewed my other stories and who have waited so patiently for my next offering. Real life has been cruel of late and has kept me away from the fandom so I am delighted to finally be back with a new story to post. I hope the wait will have been worth it and that it will not disappoint.  
**

Chapter 1

It had been an exceptionally wet and miserable evening in San Francisco and while out patrolling in their squad car Mike and Steve had been called to two crime scenes over the course of the evening. On both occasions the two men had been soaked through as both bodies found had been located outdoors. One in an alleyway in the Tenderloin district and one down by the docks. Both cases seemed totally unrelated. The alleyway body seemed to be that of a homeless man, cause of death still unclear and awaiting the coroner's report and the young man's body found on the docks bore all the hallmarks of a gang killing. After securing both crime scenes and interviewing possible witnesses the two detectives searched for possible clues hampered by the poor weather conditions. With forensic teams in place the two men returned to the shelter of their car, rainwater dripping off Mike's fedora and with Steve brushing a hand through his rain-soaked hair.

Sitting into the car and turning on the engine, Steve shivered slightly from the dampness of his attire and glanced over at Mike who looked equally as miserable and chilled as he sat into the passenger side rubbing his hands together in an effort to warm them up.

"Some weather huh buddy boy?"

"Yeah, Let's hope there are no more call outs for the rest of our shift. I'm starting to run out of dry clothes in my locker." Steve said somewhat exasperated as he drove off back towards the Bureau to type up the two crime reports.

It wasn't a pleasant drive back to Bryant street as Steve had the windscreen wipers at full tilt to keep the windscreen clear and the glare of the street lights reflecting off the wet roads made driving more hazardous and exhausting. Stopped at one set of traffic lights Steve rubbed at his tired eyes and again shook more drops of rain from his hair that had been uncomfortably dripping down the back of his trench coat and soaking his neck. He shivered again and noticed that Mike was staring at him intensely. But before he had a chance to question his partner's intense scrutiny the light had turned green and Steve turned his attention back to his driving. Breaking the silence, Mike spoke first.

"You ok buddy boy ? You've been dragging all day. You're not coming down with something are you? You've been awfully quiet."

Keeping his eyes firmly ahead on the road Steve answered.

"No ... I'm fine. Just a bit tired that's all. I haven't been sleeping too good the last few nights."

"Oh? Something on your mind? Anything you want to talk about?"

Again keeping his attention firmly on the hazardous driving conditions, Steve risked a quick half-smile over at his partner.

"No. I'm ok. Really Mike! Or at least I will be when I get out of these wet clothes."

Mike smiled back and pinching the wet fabric that was currently clinging to his knee he replied.

"I'm with you on that one buddy boy!"

Silence followed as Steve concentrated on getting them back safely to the Bureau of Inspectors and Mike sat studying his young partner.

The truth was that Mike had grown concerned about Steve over the last two days. The young man had not been his normally cheery self and a dark cloud seemed to be constantly settled over him. He was very quiet and constantly looked tired and hearing Steve's admission that he hadn't been sleeping well tied in with how sluggish he had been of late. He had cried off their normal bowling night two nights ago citing tiredness as his excuse and Mike noticed that he hadn't been eating too well either. Despite the fact that Steve held Tony's pizzas in high disregard he normally managed to eat a slice or two but Mike's thoughts went back to earlier in the evening when Steve's slices had remained untouched and Steve's latest excuse had been that he just wasn't hungry. Mike vowed in that moment that he would get to the bottom of whatever was bothering Steve regardless of whether he wanted to talk about it or not !

Sighing with relief, Steve made it to the Bureau car park and even managed to get a parking space near the door. Locking the car both men made a dash for the door through the downpour and spent the next twenty minutes changing out of their rain-soaked clothes and drying off. Mike was the first back to his office and had hung his dripping trench coat and fedora up on his coat rack and had poured two hot steaming cups of coffee. Leaving one on Steve's desk Mike took his into his office and stood staring out the window at the torrential rain and hearing the occasional clap of thunder. Within minutes Steve had joined him towelling his hair dry as he came in to the bullpen.

"I left you some hot coffee on your desk buddy boy!" Mike shouted out his office door as he saw his partner enter.

Placing the towel around his neck Steve picked up the coffee cup and gratefully gulped down the warm and soothing liquid.

"Thanks Mike! Just what the doctor ordered!"

And then sitting down at his desk Steve wasted no time in putting paper in his typewriter and taking out his notebook and opening it up on the right page he proceeded to start typing his first report of the evening. Mike sat down at his desk, again staring out at Steve who was furiously typing as if his life depended on it. Once more alarm bells were going off in Mike's head. Normally Steve would put off starting the reports and would usually take his coffee into Mike's office and sit down and exchange small talk with the older man. Steve was definitely avoiding protracted conversations and that made Mike worry all the more! That usually meant that something serious was bugging the younger man and Mike knew from bitter experience that the more serious the cause of Steve's angst the harder it would be to get him to open up! As another loud clap of thunder broke through Mike's thoughts Mike sighed loudly as he realized the enormity of the task he had just undertaken!


	2. Chapter 2

**Act of Remembrance**

Chapter 2

For the next hour Steve typed like a man possessed only stopping briefly a couple of times to pour himself a cup of coffee. On one occasion when he had poured his fourth cup he had glanced up and caught Mike's eye and only then did he put his head around the door frame to ask if Mike would like a cup. When Mike declined his offer graciously he had forced a smile and returned to his desk to resume his arduous task. As soon as he had finished typing the last letter on his report though tiredness begin to creep up on him and the excess caffeine was only making him more edgy. Brushing both hands through his hair he leaned back in his chair and stretched his back to ease his aching muscles. Then he rubbed the back of his neck with his hand to try to ease out those stiff muscles as well. He was glad the first report was finished but frowned as he remembered that he had still a second one to complete. But before he could turn his thoughts to the task at hand the dark cloud descended on him again and staring at the top drawer in his desk for a few moments, he leaned over and opened it slowly. He rummaged for a few seconds before his hand finally found the picture he was looking for. As he stared sadly at the picture a lump formed in his throat and tears threatened to appear. The phone call he had received two days earlier had dredged up some bad memories and while he had been grateful to the caller for the information he had received it had brought the guilt and upset of the past back to the forefront of his mind where it had remained and continued to torture him. Not that he had ever truly forgotten what had happened a year ago but he had managed to lock it away inside and carry on but now it was back to haunt him. He was slightly annoyed that no-one else had remembered. That no-one other than him and the caller seemed to care. Well he cared and despite his best efforts to try to not let his feelings get in the way of his work it was really getting to him more than he cared to admit.

Mike had observed Steve closely and noticed his tired stretches. The amount of coffee his young partner was consuming bothered him too. Knowing Steve as well as he did, he knew that the only time Steve ever consumed that much coffee was when he was desperately trying to keep himself awake! He decided there and then that the young man needed a good night's sleep and stood up to go out and insist on driving Steve home but he stopped abruptly where he stood when he noticed that Steve was staring at something very intently. Mike did not like the faraway and forlorn look in Steve's eye and yet from his office he couldn't see what Steve was looking at. Wondering if he should interrupt Steve or not Mike finally decided that he had to get to the bottom of whatever was upsetting his young partner and so he headed out of his office under the pretence of pouring himself a cup of coffee.

Out of the corner of his eye Steve saw Mike approaching and quickly buried the picture back in the drawer and closed it swiftly. Then he opened up his notebook and began reading the notes he had taken at the second crime scene ready to type them into his report. The action was not lost on Mike who became even more curious now about what had held Steve's attention so closely. Mike could see that Steve was purposefully avoiding eye contact with him and decided that it was time to try to talk to him again. Having poured his coffee Mike headed straight over to Steve's desk and sat on the corner of it drinking from his cup and observing Steve closely.

Steve had hoped that Mike would retreat back into his office with his coffee but cursed his luck when he saw Mike heading straight over to him instead. Knowing how perceptive Mike was Steve was anxious that Mike would sense the upset that the picture had evoked and quickly grabbed some paper off his desk and spun quickly around to his typewriter with his back to Mike and proceeded to place the paper in it ready for typing. Mike smiled at Steve's diversionary tactics. He knew Steve better than he knew himself and knew that he was trying to act normally so as not to alert Mike to what was really going on inside his head. Sometimes he wished that Steve would open up more about things that bothered him instead of always bottling them up inside and trying to deal with things on his own." You're not getting off that easy this time buddy boy "Mike thought to himself.

"How are those reports coming along buddy boy ?" Mike asked studying his young partner closely.

Hoping that his voice would not betray the emotions he felt Steve cleared his throat and spoke as normally as he could.

"I have the first one done and I'm just starting the second one now. You know I can finish up here if you want to head home Mike ?" Steve asked as he could almost feel Mike's piercing blue eyes burning a hole in his back.

"No. It's alright buddy boy. I think I'll stick around a bit longer. But thanks for the offer anyway!"

Steve heard the determination in Mike's voice and knew then that Mike was going to try to talk to him again about what was bothering him and he stopped typing and sighed and feeling the tension in his neck return he reached his hand up again and proceeded to knead his aching muscles.

"Your neck sore? Here let me take a look." Mike asked and before Steve had a chance to protest Mike had stood up and standing behind him proceeded to massage Steve's shoulders and neck.

"It's ok Mike." Steve said grabbing Mike's hand to stop him. But Mike merely removed Steve's hand and continued his ministrations.

"It's most certainly not ok Steve. You're wound tighter than a two dollar watch buddy boy. Your neck muscles are tied up in knots!"

After a few minutes Mike's strong hands had eased out the painfully tight muscles in his shoulders and neck and feeling Steve's tension ease a little Mike stopped his ministrations and seizing his opportunity Mike patted the young man's shoulder and spoke softly.

"Are you ready to tell me yet what's chewing on you buddy boy? Must be something pretty big to cause muscle knots like this. Huh?"

Steve had anticipated the question and knew he wasn't ready to share with Mike what was on his mind just yet so instead he half-glanced over his shoulder at his mentor and friend and answered as convincingly as he could.

"I'm just tired that's all Mike. It's nothing to worry about."

Then seeing a disappointed look cross Mike's face and feeling guilty for not confiding in his partner he tried to lighten the mood and added.

"My neck is feeling a lot better though. You know if you ever quit your day job you might just consider that as a career choice!"

Mike smiled at Steve's comment but deep down he was slightly disappointed that Steve hadn't felt able to tell him what was bugging him. Seeing the tiredness etched on his partners face and feeling deflated at the evenings turn of events Mike patted Steve on the shoulder once more and spoke.

"Very funny wise guy! Come on! Let's call it a day. It's almost two am . You look done in and I feel about the same. Let's go home and try to catch up on some sleep. What do you say?"

"I've only just started the second report Mike! I'd rather stay and get it finished if it's ok with you?" Steve protested turning back towards the typewriter.

Snatching up Steve's notebook in one fluid movement Mike insisted again.

"NO! It's not ok with me. The report can wait until tomorrow buddy boy! You're going to go home and rest now! Is that clear?" Mike reiterated leaving Steve in no doubt that home was where he was heading whether he liked it or not! Then he quickly added. "And I'll drive this time. You did your fair share of the driving earlier. Get your jacket."

Steve realized that Mike was annoyed with him and knew that there was no point in arguing so grabbing his jacket he stood up and addressed Mike.

"Ok Mike. I just need to go and get the wet clothes out of my locker. Do you want me to get yours for you too?"

Realizing from Steve's subdued demeanor that he had come across a bit too harsh Mike softened his tone and replied.

"Yes please. ... Thanks buddy boy!" and reaching into his pocket he retrieved his locker key and handed it to Steve and watched as his young partner left the bullpen somewhat heavy-hearted.

Mike was annoyed with himself for making Steve feel worse. It just really irked him when Steve was behaving so stubbornly. Then suddenly he realized he was still standing right beside Steve's desk drawer. Looking at it and realizing that it would take Steve at least ten minutes to make it down to the locker room and retrieve the items from both lockers and return Mike was sorely tempted to find out what his young protegé had been staring at. It might help him figure out what was causing Steve's angst. Placing his hand on the handle of the drawer Mike started to open it slowly but then stopped himself and closed it again swiftly.

Knowing he would be betraying his partner's trust by rifling through his desk drawer Mike was cross with himself for even thinking of it! "What were you thinking!" Mike scolded himself. "The boy will tell you what's wrong when he's good and ready!" and marching into his office he got his coat and hat.

Then much to his dismay he remembered that the car keys were buried somewhere under the strewn paperwork on his desk. He had fallen behind over the last few days in sorting the various phone messages, letters and files that had built up around him and vowed to sort it first thing tomorrow. As he pushed the assorted paperwork aside and found the keys little did Mike know that one of the phone messages buried on his desk held the answer to Steve's current melancholy. The phone message taken down by Bill Tanner two days ago and placed on Mike's desk in his absence lay hidden among the chaotic pile on Mike's desk, unread and unnoticed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Act of Remembrance**

**A/N : ****I am hoping to post two chapters a day of this story but as you have all waited so patiently for this story I have decided to post a third one today as a special treat for all my loyal readers and reviewers! Enjoy!**

Chapter 3

Mike had insisted on driving Steve home despite Steve's protests that he was perfectly able to drive himself. But both men were at least relieved that the rain had finally stopped. The journey home had been driven in silence, Both men were tired and feeling bad for different reasons. Mike was still slightly upset with Steve for not confiding in him and partly annoyed with himself for almost considering invading the privacy of Steve's desk contents to satisfy his own curiosity. Steve on the other hand knew that Mike was upset with him and yet he didn't feel that Mike would fully understand the reasons behind his current state of mind. He needed to deal with it himself and anyway he felt that when the anniversary came and went in two days time he would be able to lock his feelings away again and he hoped that things could once again return to normal.

When they pulled up outside Steve's apartment in Union street Mike spoke first.

"Try to get some sleep! It's almost three am now. I'll pick you up again at noon and we'll see what Bernie has to tell us about the autopsies and you can finish the second report. Ok?"

"Ok Mike." Steve said submissively and opened the passenger door to get out. Steve hated when Mike was angry with him and for a split second he considered telling Mike why he was off form. Turning to look at his mentor and friend he started.

"Listen Mike ... " but the rest of the words refused to follow so admitting defeat he continued instead. " ... Thanks for the lift. I'll see you tomorrow!" and getting out he gathered his belongings from the back and waved briefly at Mike as he crossed the deserted street and headed up the steps to his apartment.

For a brief moment Mike thought Steve was going to talk openly to him but seemed to change his mind much to Mike's dismay and all that was left for Mike to do was watch his downhearted partner ascend the steps and enter his apartment and then he drove off in the direction of home feeling quite heavy-hearted himself.

Steve opened the door to his apartment and stepped inside. He watched as Mike drove off down the street and then closed the door again and made his way into his living room. Discarding his jacket and tie on a chair and opening the top buttons of his shirt he then made his way to the kitchen. Opening the fridge he frowned when he remembered that he hadn't shopped for groceries lately and saw that the fridge was mostly empty. So grabbing a beer instead he took a few swigs from the bottle and brought it with him into the bedroom.

Dropping heavily onto the bed he swung his legs up and sat up on the bed and reaching over to his locker he placed his beer down and picked up a bowl of sunflower seeds instead. As he munched his favorite snack he dreaded another fitful night's sleep tortured by memories that wouldn't leave him in peace. Taking another few mouthfuls of his beer he shifted down on the bed pulling the soft pillow under his head and placed the bowl and bottle back on his bedside locker. Trying to stay awake didn't last long though as exhaustion took hold and his heavy eyelids closed and soon Steve was breathing evenly and had fallen into a deep sleep. But unfortunately for Steve hell was about to pay another visit!

Soon the nightmare started again. He saw the attack as if he had actually witnessed it and heard the screams. He wanted to help. To stop it from happening but as is usual in nightmares he couldn't move. Something was preventing him from assisting. Then it was over as quickly as it had started. All he could do was hold the lifeless body and grieve for his loss! He felt himself shake with racking sobs of despair and then the scene changed and he was standing in a graveyard. It was dark and he heard a voice. A familiar voice. A voice he missed. He strained to hear what the voice was saying. "Where were you Steve?" the voice asked. "I needed you. WHERE WERE YOU STEVE ?" The words cut into his heart like a sharp knife. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! " Steve mumbled in despair as he tried to see where the voice was coming from. Stepping backwards Steve lost his footing and realized to his horror that there was an open grave right behind him. He tried to right himself but a hand grabbed him from behind and then he was falling. Down, down endlessly into a dark abyss. Panic-stricken he heard a loud shout and bolting upright in the bed realized the shout had come from him. Breathing heavily and shaking uncontrollably it took Steve several minutes to calm himself down and stumbling to the bathroom he threw up violently and then sat for several minutes more on the cold bathroom floor as the nightmare remained vividly clear in his head.

Finally managing to calm himself down he dragged himself up off the floor and checked his watch. It was just before six am. Not daring to risk going back to sleep Steve decided to shower instead and after a warm shower he shaved and dressed in a clean trousers and shirt and after hanging up his soaked clothes from yesterday and making himself as strong cup of coffee as he felt his empty, upset stomach could handle he decided to check if his morning paper had been delivered.

Stepping out of his front door Steve was dismayed to see that the paper delivery guy had been lazy again and left all the residents papers on the bottom step again. So leaving his door open and not bothering to put on any shoes he made his way down the stairs and bent down and picked up his paper. The early morning breeze made him shiver but at the same time it felt good to breathe in the fresh sea air. There was a slight fog coming off the bay but at least it was dry and as Steve turned to go back up the stairs he heard a faint cry for help. Still bothered by his recurring nightmare at first Steve figured that his mind was playing tricks on him but as he stood perfectly still and listened carefully he heard it again! It was coming from the ground floor apartment under his. An elderly lady had moved in there just over six months ago and Steve had often passed the time of day with her and had occasionally helped her by carrying in her shopping and reaching things that were on high shelves for her. All in all Steve had become quite fond of the sweet lady who lived there on her own.

Feeling slightly alarmed and switching into police mode Steve raced down the steps, along the sidewalk and up the couple of steps to the ground floor apartment, suddenly wishing that he had stopped to put on shoes before exiting his house as the cold,damp ground chilled his bare feet. Steve knocked on his neighbour's door and tried the handle but found that it was locked.

"Mrs Peterson? Mrs Peterson are you ok? It's Steve from upstairs. Are you ok in there?"

Hearing another faint cry Steve bent down and looked through the letterbox and much to his alarm saw the form of Mrs Peterson lying on the floor of the hall very distressed and calling for help!

"Hold on Mrs Peterson! I'm gonna try to get in there to help you. Just hang on! Everything's going to be alright."

"There's a key under the third flower-pot under the window young man! Please help me!" Mrs Peterson feebly spoke.

Hearing this Steve picked up the third flowerpot and finding the key where it was supposed to be he opened the door and raced to where his neighbour was lying on her left side on the floor and knelt down beside her.

"Mrs Peterson! What happened? Are you hurt?" Steve asked hurriedly and breathlessly trying to visibly check the old lady for signs of injury.

"Oh thank goodness you heard me! I thought no-one would find me." the old lady sobbed very distressed. "Oh bless you young man!"

Then calming down a little knowing she had finally been rescued she continued somewhat shakily.

"I fell and hurt my foot and banged my head ... I must have knocked myself out because I woke up on the floor and it hurt to move ..." and with that she started to cry again.

Steve then noticed that Mrs Peterson's left slipper clad foot was very badly swollen and that there was a nasty looking cut just at her hairline on the left hand side where blood had oozed and started to congeal. Where was Mike's handkerchief when he needed it Steve thought to himself. Taking the elderly lady's hand in his he sought to reassure her.

"It's ok Mrs Peterson. Everything is going to be alright! I need you to lie still while I go call an ambulance and get some things to make you more comfortable. Ok?"

But as Steve went to get up, Mrs. Peterson gripped his hand tighter stopping his progress.

"Oh no! Not an ambulance! I don't like hospitals. Please call my granddaughter instead. I'll be fine. I'm afraid of hospitals you see. I don't want to go there on my own ..." and with that the old lady began to sob uncontrollably.

Steve felt very sorry for Mrs Peterson in that instant. God knows he wasn't that keen on hospitals himself and he understood that it could be a harrowing experience to go there unaccompanied. After a few seconds Steve had decided what he would do. Trying his best to calm and console his neighbour Steve spoke softly and sympathetically .

"Alright now. Take it easy! Everything is going to be ok. Mrs Peterson, your foot is badly swollen. It might be broken and the fact that you were knocked out means you need to be seen at the hospital. I'll make a deal with you ok? You let me call the ambulance and I'll call your granddaughter at the same time and then I'll travel in the ambulance with you and I'll stay with you at the hospital until your granddaughter arrives ok? What do you say? Would that be alright?"

The elderly lady was very touched by the young man's offer and felt easier knowing that she wouldn't have to go to the hospital alone but also felt bad for being a nuisance. It was something she had always vowed she wouldn't become. Her granddaughter had wanted her to move in with her six months ago but she had not wanted to be a burden and had rented this apartment instead to hold onto her independence as long as she was able to. And now here she was putting her young neighbour to such trouble. Through her sobs she spoke sadly.

"I couldn't put you to such trouble young man. It just wouldn't be fair. I know you work long hours and you need your rest "

Before she could say anything else, Steve squeezed his neighbour's hand and reassured her again. Truth was he would be glad of the distraction to take his mind off his current depression. And knowing that Mike would not be collecting him until noon Steve reckoned he'd have plenty of time to bring his neighbour to the hospital, wait with her and be back before Mike knew he was ever gone.

"It's no trouble at all really! I was awake anyway. Now I just need to use your phone and I'll be right back. Take it easy. Ok?"

Mrs Peterson appeared to calm down a bit and smiling at her young neighbour she finally let go of his hand and answered.

"Ok. My phone is over there on the coffee table and my granddaughter's number is on a notepad beside it."

Smiling back, Steve got up and raced to the phone and picking up the receiver he first phoned for an ambulance. As the dispatcher's voice came on the line Steve spoke clearly and distinctly.

"Hello, my name is Stephen Keller. I need an ambulance at 287 Union Street, ground floor apartment please. My elderly neighbour has had a bad fall. Her foot is badly swollen and she hit her head and was knocked out for a while. I just found her a short while ago."

Steve listened as the dispatcher assured him that the ambulance would be with him shortly and after getting some medical instructions on how to help make his neighbour more comfortable until the ambulance arrived he thanked them and then he quickly dialled the next number from the notepad. The name was written beside the number. Steve quickly glanced over at his neighbour to check that she was still ok while he waited for the phone to be answered. The phone seemed to ring for an eternity and Steve was just about to hang up when an answering machine clicked in and a young woman's voice relayed the message that she was unable to answer the phone and requesting the caller to leave a message. Steve would have preferred to speak to the lady's granddaughter herself and not a machine under the circumstances but left with no choice and anxious not to leave his neighbour for too long, he left the following message.

"Hello, Ms Peterson. This is Stephen Keller. I live in the apartment above your grandmother's here in Union Street. I'm sorry to have to tell you this in a phone message but your grandmother has had a bad fall. She's alright so there's no need to be too alarmed but she hurt her foot and hit her head so I've called an ambulance and I'm going to go with her to San Francisco General. Could you meet us there as soon as you get this message please? In the meantime, you don't have to worry. I'll make sure she's looked after. Ok. I guess I'll see you there. Bye."

As soon as Steve hung up he raced back over to Mrs Peterson and made sure that she was still ok.


	4. Chapter 4

**Act Of Remembrance **

Chapter 4

"Did you speak to my granddaughter?" Mrs Peterson asked.

"No, I'm afraid I got her answering machine but I left her a message to meet us at the hospital. Don't worry. The ambulance will be here soon."

A look of disappointment briefly crossed the old lady's face but was quickly replaced by a forced smile.

"Oh, she works long hours too you know. She's an assistant curator at the Oakland Museum of California. She's going to be cross with me for this fall. She never wanted me to rent this place. She said I couldn't look after myself. I guess I just proved her right huh?" and with that the elderly lady's smile faded and a sadness replaced it.

In that instant Steve felt sorry for his neighbour and so he tried to cheer her up.

"I'm sure she'll be too busy being relieved that you're ok to be cross with you for anything."

Steve then noticed that the old lady was shivering and he reckoned she must have lain there undiscovered for quite some time. Looking quickly around he spotted a blanket on the back of an armchair and hurriedly retrieved it along with a cushion. Then kneeling beside the old lady he very gently lifted her head and placed the cushion underneath and covered her with the blanket.

"You're freezing! How long ago did you fall?" Steve asked fearful his neighbour might have slight hypothermia from lying on the floor so long in a weakened condition.

"Sometime last night. I heard the heavy rain and thunder and got up to check on my poor Teddy. He hates storms you see and so I went to see where he was and I fell over him in the dark...The poor thing must be hiding from the fright." the elderly lady stated with worry in her voice.

"Excuse me Ma'am. Your Teddy?" Steve asked beginning to wonder if the old lady was indeed concussed and rambling.

"Yes young man!. Teddy is my cat! Oh, who will mind him if I have to go to hospital?" she asked getting upset again.

Steve smiled, relieved that the statement had been explained satisfactorily .

"Now, now, don't worry Mrs Peterson. I'll find him and make sure he's looked after. Anderson upstairs happens to love cats. I'm sure he wouldn't mind looking after Teddy until you're home again. Now do you have any ice in your freezer that we could put on that foot and do you have a first aid kit anywhere that I could use to clean that cut?" Steve asked turning his attention back to the task at hand.

"There's some frozen peas in the icebox and there's a first aid kit under the sink. And please call me Mary. All those Mrs Petersons are making me feel very old young man." Mrs Peterson said smiling and patting Steve's hand endearingly.

Steve blushed slightly and smiled back.

Ok Mrs ... Mary. Only if you call me Steve. Ok? Now I'll be right back. Just lie still."

Steve hurried into the kitchen and found the first aid kit where the old lady had said it was and then opened the icebox and found the bag of frozen peas. The kitchen tiles were cold on Steve's bare feet and again Steve wished that he had stopped to put shoes on earlier. Glancing at his watch he saw that it was six fifteen and prayed to himself that the ambulance would get here soon then returning to his neighbour he again very gently placed the frozen bag of peas on Mary's swollen foot. The old lady winced and tears of pain appeared in her eyes. Steve felt bad for hurting her but was only carrying out the instructions given to him by the ambulance dispatcher.

"I'm sorry! I know it hurts but we have to try to get the swelling down. The ambulance should be here soon."

Then opening the first aid box Steve poured some antiseptic onto some cotton wool and proceeded to very gently clean the nasty cut on Mary's head.

The old lady winced occasionally but overall Steve felt that she was very brave considering the amount of discomfort she must be in. Steve felt that the cut would probably require stitches as it looked fairly deep but decided against telling his neighbour that information incase she refused to go to the hospital as a result. He had been so intent on his task of carefully cleaning the cut and putting a sterile dressing on it that he hadn't noticed Mary staring at him with an admiring smile on her face. When he had finished his work and finally saw her smiling at him, he looked questioningly at her.

"What? What's the matter?"

Mary patted his arm and answered emotionally.

"You're such a sweet and gentle young man. Your father must be very proud of you."

Steve was very taken aback by this statement and not quite knowing what to say, he began to tidy up the first aid things while he answered.

"Well, I don't really know. My parents both died when I was small. I was raised by my grandfather and an aunt and uncle in Modesto."

Mary turned pale and stammered apologetically.

"Oh my! ... Oh I'm so sorry! ... I just assumed that the man who calls to you all the time was your father. How silly of me! Please forgive me. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions."

Steve smiled when he realized that Mary was talking about Mike and quickly reassured her that he wasn't harbouring any ill will.

"It's ok. There's nothing to forgive. That man you spoke of is my boss and my partner and you know in some ways he acts like my father ..."

Just then their conversation was cut short as a man's voice could be heard outside.

"STEVE?"

Steve recognized the voice as belonging to his upstairs neighbour Anderson and quickly answered.

"ANDY! I'm down here in Mrs Peterson's apartment!"

Steve then heard footsteps and within seconds Anderson had appeared in the doorway. When he saw their neighbour on the floor and Steve kneeling beside her he was visibly alarmed.

"Oh my God! Steve! What happened?"

"Mrs Peterson fell and hurt herself. I found her about twenty-five minutes ago. I'm going to go with her in the ambulance. It should be here any minute."

"I was just getting home myself. I saw your door wide open and wondered what was going on!" Anderson explained.

Damn! With the panic of finding his neighbour on the floor Steve had forgotten that he'd left his door wide open! Some detective he was ... he chastised himself.

"I'll stay with Mrs Peterson while you go lock up your place Steve." Anderson said as he took Steve's place at his neighbour's side.

"Thanks Andy! Mary I'll be ... "

"That's ok. You go ahead! I'll be alright." Mary interrupted before he had a chance to finish, smiling gratefully at the young detective.

As Steve got to the door Anderson called out again.

"Oh and Steve!"

Turning around Steve answered "Yeah?"

"You might wanna put some shoes on! It's kinda damp out there!" Anderson said chuckling to himself.

"Very funny!" Steve replied chuckling too and then he turned and raced up to his apartment. He had a quick look around and satisfied himself that everything was as he left it thankfully. Then he locked his gun, badge and handcuffs away in his bedside locker drawer and then hearing sirens in the distance he quickly pulled on a pair of slip on shoes not even bothering to put socks on and grabbing his blue casual jacket he locked up his apartment and hurried back down the steps just as the ambulance pulled up to the kerb.

Steve guided them into their patient and while the paramedics attended to Mrs Peterson and got her safely strapped onto a gurney, Steve filled Anderson in on the missing cat. Andy agreed to find it and look after it while they were gone and Steve jotted down Mary's granddaughter's phone number in his notebook just in case he would have to call her again from the hospital. Then within minutes Mary and Steve were heading into the back of the ambulance for their journey to San Francisco General. Quite a crowd of nosey neighbours had gathered outside to see what was going on much to Steve's annoyance and seeing how distressed Mary was at the unwanted attention Steve switched into police mode again and announced loudly and sternly.

"Nothing to see here folks. Everything's under control. Could you go back to your homes please? Thank you."

And then he joined Mary and as the ambulance took off at speed to the hospital Steve shook his head as he watched the crowd disperse through the back window of the ambulance. Then turning his attention back to Mary, Steve noticed that she was smiling broadly at him again.

"Boy, you sure told that bunch of busy bodies what for! Thank you young man ... for everything." and with that the elderly lady took Steve's hand and squeezed it in gratitude.

Steve smiled at Mary and then checked his watch. It was six thirty-five. He had plenty of time before Mike would come to collect him for work. Steve only hoped that Mary's granddaughter would get the phone message and reach the hospital with enough time to spare for him to get home and get ready before Mike arrived. He didn't really want to have to explain to the older detective how he had managed to avoid another night's sleep! Mike would be furious and a furious Mike was indeed a force to be reckoned with and something he would rather avoid at present if possible. As the sirens blared and Mary seemed to doze under the watchful eye of the EMT. Steve felt his sadness return and again the sirens reminded him of that awful morning a year ago when he took a similar journey in the back of an ambulance with someone he had truly cared for only that time unlike this one his loved one lay in a cold bodybag. His hopeless task had been escorting the lifeless body to the Morgue. The minutes ticked by and the speed the ambulance was travelling at started to nauseate his already upset stomach. With the memory of that fateful ambulance ride horribly vivid in his mind and his heart heavy from the emotions it evoked Steve prayed the bumpy ride wouldn't take too long to reach their destination.


	5. Chapter 5

**Act of Remembrance**

Chapter 5

Luckily for Steve's queasy stomach the ambulance arrived at the hospital fairly quickly and Mrs Peterson was wheeled into the emergency room. Steve obviously had to wait outside while the doctor's checked her out however her nervousness of hospitals meant that the nurses and Steve had to convince her that he would be just outside in the waiting room before she allowed them to bring her in through the double doors of the ER department. They also assured her that as soon as her granddaughter arrived she would be allowed in.

Steve sat down in the waiting room and prepared himself for a long wait. He got himself a cup of coffee but despite the fact that he tried adding sugar to disguise the taste, it truly was the worst cup of coffee he had tasted in a while. It felt like he was drinking black tar and eventually he discarded it when his upset stomach protested and fetched a paper cup of water instead. He watched the clock hands on the waiting room clock move ever so slowly and the time dragged on and on. He tried thumbing through some magazines that were lying around but couldn't find anything of enough interest to hold his attention. He began to feel tired and stifled a yawn. Brushing his hands through his hair, he then began to rub the stiff muscles at the back of his neck that seemed to be tightening up again despite Mike's earlier ministrations. He was also beginning to regret attempting to drink the bad hospital coffee as his stomach churned in protest and he felt slightly nauseous again. He fumbled in his jacket pocket and retrieved his notebook and opened it on the page where he had written down Mary's granddaughter's number. Glancing once more at the clock on the wall he noted that it was coming up to seven fifty-five and wondered if maybe she hadn't got the original phone message. As he sat contemplating if he should try ringing her again he heard a faint commotion coming from behind the double doors and stowed his notebook back in his pocket as he saw a nurse exit them and head deliberately in his direction. As she reached Steve she asked hurriedly and with great urgency.

"Are you the young man who travelled here in the ambulance with Mrs Peterson?"

"Yes, I'm Steve Keller. I live in the apartment above hers. I found her earlier this morning after her fall. Is she alright?" Steve asked slightly worried by the distressed tone in the nurse's original question.

"Yes, she's doing fine. The doctor has x-rayed her foot and thankfully it is just very badly sprained. He thinks she has a mild concussion due to the bang on the head she got when she fell but our main problem is she requires a couple of stitches to the cut on her head and she is refusing to let us attend to it. She's a very nervous patient. Would you mind sitting with her while we stitch the wound? It might calm her down. She is very agitated."

"No , not at all. If you think it will help. She told me earlier that she has a fear of hospitals." Steve answered standing up and following the nurse through the ER doors and to a cubicle on the right. Inwardly he was relieved to hear that Mary's foot wasn't broken and having had stitches himself on more occasions than he cared to remember he understood her reluctance to submit to the procedure readily.

Mary was giving the doctor a hard time and seemed very upset and disoriented. As Steve entered the small cubicle he heard Mary asking the doctor.

"Has my granddaughter arrived yet? I would rather wait until she gets here please."

Steve could hear Mary starting to get upset when the doctor informed her that she hadn't surfaced yet and felt sorry for the elderly lady in that instant. Deciding to do his best to be of help to all concerned he tried to lighten the tone and spoke.

"Now, Mary. What's this I hear about you not letting the doctor stitch that cut on your head. Huh? Now they're just trying to do their job and patch you up good as new. You do know that Teddy is at home relying on you to get back to him as soon as you can now?" Steve said smiling and taking his neighbours hand in his and giving it a comforting squeeze.

Hearing Steve's voice and seeing the young man beside her bed seemed to calm Mary almost instantly as she seemed relieved to see a friendly face. Squeezing Steve's hand in return she almost seemed embarrassed at being seen to be such a difficult patient but still upset at the absence of her grand-daughter and the unfamiliarity of her surroundings Mary choked back a sob and like a frightened child she met Steve's gaze and almost whispered.

"I'm scared ... "

As a solitary tear fell down Mary's cheek Steve felt great sympathy for Mary and pulling a chair up and sitting down beside Mary's bed while still keeping a firm grip on her hand he spoke reassuringly.

"I know. I know you are. And believe me I know hospital can be a scary place. Strange faces, strange noises. Medical instruments everywhere and it's unfamiliar and frightening but these good people just want what's best for you and sometimes we have to just face our fears and replace them with trust. Now why don't I just stay with you while they fix up that cut and if your granddaughter hasn't arrived within the next hour I'll call her again. What do you say? Would that be ok?"

As Steve finished speaking, another tear fell down Mary's cheek but this time it was one of deep gratitude to her young neighbour. Here he was, a fine, well-mannered and compassionate human being giving up his time unselfishly and without need for reward to an old lady he hardly knew. She wondered if he knew that in the last few hours alone he had single-handedly restored her faith in the younger generation. Feeling a renewed strength with this young man supporting her Mary nodded her head and answered.

"Ok ... I guess that would be alright. Bless you!"

While Steve spoke, the nurses and the doctor had stood quietly listening to him comforting the elderly lady and not one heart remained untouched by the kindness and compassion that Steve showed her. As soon as she agreed to the procedure they set about promptly and efficiently stitching the cut and now with Mary calm and more at ease the task took less than ten minutes to complete. Then they administered a mild sedative by injection to allow Mary to rest comfortably but only after it was agreed that Steve would be allowed to stay with her until she fell asleep. With her badly sprained foot raised and her cut cleaned and dressed the nurses and the doctor dispersed and left to attend to other patients leaving just one nurse and Steve behind to keep an eye on Mary until she drifted off to sleep.

Mary kept a firm grip on Steve's hand as if he were her last lifeline and in a strange way holding Mary's hand provided him with some comfort too from his current torment. As soon as the last nurse left on an errand and the two companions were left alone Mary turned to Steve and with a sombre expression on her face she announced sadly.

"I don't think my granddaughter is going to come, Steve."

Slightly taken aback by this statement and realizing how low Mary must be to even contemplate such an idea Steve quickly rushed to refute her theory.

"Now what would make you think that? Of course she'll show up. She probably just hasn't got the phone message I left yet. Why don't I go and call her again. Ok?"

But as Steve went to get up, Mary gripped his hand tighter and stopped him from leaving.

"No, Steve. You don't understand. You see we haven't spoken to each other for over six months now. We ... Well we kind of had a disagreement." Mary stated sadly.

Steve could tell how heartbroken Mary was over falling out with her granddaughter and it made him remember how bad he felt not confiding in Mike earlier that morning and the hurt look in Mike's eyes as he drove away.

"I'm sure whatever you argued about wouldn't stop your granddaughter from coming to see you in hospital."

"I'm not so sure. You see my husband passed away two years ago. We were married for fifty-seven years! Imagine that! I'll be eighty-one next August. After he died I just couldn't stay in the house anymore. I lasted there just over a year but there were too many memories. Oh, all good memories but sometimes they're the most painful. My daughter and her husband live in New York. He's one of them fancy journalists but my granddaughter lives in Oakland. She wanted me to move in with her. She didn't think that I could manage by myself but I've always lived in the Bay area all my life. I don't expect you to understand but my time will come when I'll end up being a burden to someone or cooped up in a nursing home having someone spoon feed me. I just wanted to hold onto my independence as long as I could so I rented the apartment on Union Street. It suits me fine. It's just the right size for Teddy and me but my granddaughter never approved and we haven't spoken since I moved in." Mary stated sadly.

"I guess I proved her right this time didn't I? Oh Steve! I miss my husband so much! It's a terrible thing to lose someone you care so much about." Mary sobbed and then pulling herself together she wiped her eyes and said.

"Oh, but a young fellow like you wouldn't know anything about that yet thankfully!" Mary said and turned to look at the young man seated beside her.

Steve had listened to Mary's sad story and heard the heartbreak in her voice. Her words reverberated around his brain."It's a terrible thing to lose someone you care so much about." Again his subconscious thoughts brought him back to that fateful day that still tortured him. All the feelings he had felt that day flooded back and threatened to choke him and sadness filled his heart. As he stared into space lost in his waking nightmares Mary saw the depth of the misery in his face and squeezing his hand she placed the other on his cheek and sadly spoke.

"Or maybe you do ..." was all she said now worried by his pale and melancholic appearance.

Then remembering what the young man had told her back in her apartment her heart sank.

"Oh, of course! Why I'm such an old fool. You lost your parents when you were small. That must have been dreadful. I'm so sorry for my carelessness. Forgive me!"

The touch of Mary's hand on his cheek brought him out of his thoughts and clearing his throat he sat up straighter in the chair and spoke as normally as his frayed emotions would allow.

"To tell the truth I don't remember much about them. I was only five when they died. Growing up with my aunt, uncle and grandfather became normal for me ... But last year ...I lost someone I cared a lot about. She was a fellow police officer. She was killed ..."

Steve stopped as the lump that appeared in his throat grew bigger and Steve wondered if he would be able to continue his story at all.

"Oh my! That's awful! You poor young man. Was she killed in the line of duty?"

Steve shook his head and did his best to continue.

"No. Not exactly. She agreed to be bait for a rapist we were trying to catch. He never showed so we called the operation off and she went home. I went down to the station to type up the report. He ... He was waiting for her when she got home. He ... attacked her and killed her ..."

Mary gasped at the last sentence and it was her turn to feel sorry for Steve.

"Oh Steve! That's terrible. You obviously cared a great deal for her. Did you ever get the person who did it?"

"Yeah! We got him. I thought that would make me feel better. You know, getting justice for her but it didn't. I still feel guilty for not being there for her. I was coping ok, I guess, but her first anniversary is tomorrow. The family is having a memorial service for her. I guess it's kind of dragged it all up again ..."

Steve had stopped talking and looked at Mary. She was watching him with tears in her eyes and he suddenly realized that he had just told her all the things he hadn't seemed to be able to tell Mike. He actually hadn't intended on burdening the old lady with his inner torment but the words had just flowed out of nowhere as if the floodgates had opened. Feeling slightly embarrassed for his loss of control he quickly pulled himself together and smiled at Mary and patted her arm.

"Well, that's enough morbidness for one day huh? Now you need to get some sleep." Steve said desperately trying to change the topic of conversation and still holding Mary's hand he used his other hand to fix the blankets around her.

Out of nowhere, Mary asked her next unexpected question which knocked Steve for six.

"Is that why you haven't been sleeping?"

"Now ... how would you know I haven't been sleeping?" Steve asked in amazement.

Sheepishly the old lady answered.

"Well you look exhausted and the last few nights I heard you yelling like you were having nightmares or something."

Seeing Steve's shocked reaction, Mary quickly continued.

"Oh, I didn't hear very much at all really, just a loud yell or two. You know you really mustn't blame yourself for what happened. It was a tragic incident but you couldn't have known it would happen. Have you told that nice man who calls for you about your nightmares?"

Still reeling from the fact that someone actually knew about his nightmares, Steve felt himself blush under Mary's watchful gaze and stammered.

"No ... No I haven't told him. I tried a couple of times but I just couldn't get the words out. No, I need to deal with it myself. Look Mary, I'm sorry you had to hear my nightmares. Oh man!" was the only other thing Steve managed to say and he suddenly wished the ground would open up and swallow him.

Seeing his embarrassment and obvious discomfort, Mary squeezed the young man's hand and smiling affectionately at Steve, Mary spoke from her heart despite feeling the sedative start to kick in and the drowsiness descend upon her.

"Please don't be sorry. You really should tell him. I'll bet he worries about you and you know a fine young man told me recently that sometimes we have to replace our fears with trust and it truly was excellent advice. You truly are a kind-hearted young man Steve and you know I asked you once if your father was proud of you but I now know for certain that both your parents would be extremely proud of you. I never had any sons or grandsons sadly but if I had I'd wish that they'd be just like you. Thank you for everything!" and with one final squeeze of Steve's hand Mary closed her eyes and within mere seconds had drifted off in a drug induced sleep.

Steve lay back in the chair as he sat watching Mary, touched by her kind words and decided to stay for a few minutes to make sure she was fully asleep before going to ring her granddaughter again. However the tiredness seemed to be contagious and despite his best efforts to stay awake, the exhaustion overtook him and sitting there beside the hospital bed still holding the old lady's hand his eyes closed of their own accord and his head fell forward onto his chest as he too fell asleep. When the nurse came in several minutes later she didn't have the heart to wake him and disturb the touching scene in front of her. And after checking her patient she left again as silently as she had arrived.

**Meanwhile...**

A good few hours later Mike pulled up outside Steve's apartment in Union Street. He hoped that Steve had managed to get a good nights sleep and that he would be in better form this afternoon. He really hated seeing his partner so down and hated it even more when he refused to talk about what was bugging him. Truth was he hadn't slept great himself as he found himself tossing and turning and trying to figure out what was going on with Steve. Taking the steps two at a time he knocked at Steve's door and when no answer came he knocked a second time. When still no answer came Mike began to worry. As he stood outside Steve's front door, he checked his watch. It was just five past twelve. Steve was always punctual and that worried Mike even more. Unfortunately for Mike, Anderson upstairs had received a call from his sister to meet her for lunch just twenty minutes before and had left just before Mike arrived. Otherwise he would have heard Mike knocking on Steve's door and could have told him what had happened. Instead an elderly lady opened her window in the building beside Steve's and spoke loudly across to Mike.

"If you're looking for that detective fellow, he's not there. He went off in an ambulance about five and a half hours ago. The whole block was woken up by the commotion! I heard them say they were heading to San Francisco General."

Mike's blood turned cold as he heard that news! Dear God! Maybe he'd been ill and hadn't let on.

"Thank you!" Mike called out but the lady had closed the window as quickly as she had opened it and as he raced back down the steps and into his car fear for what had happened to his partner filled his heart and mind and as he sped off in the direction of the hospital and in search of answers, he prayed that Steve was ok.


	6. Chapter 6

**Act Of Remembrance**

Chapter 6

As Rachel Peterson rushed through the double doors of San Francisco General her heart was pounding wildly. Having worked the twelve-hour night shift cataloging the museum's latest acquisition she had returned home a half an hour ago to the flashing red light on her answering machine. As she listened to the voice on the message her worst nightmare came through. Her grandmother had fallen and was being taken to the hospital by ambulance. Rachel knew how her grandmother hated hospitals. She had a deep fear of them. Rachel and her grandmother had always been very close but six months ago they had fallen out over where they both felt her grandmother should live. Rachel had desperately wanted her grandmother to move it with her and was secretly quite hurt when her grandmother refused opting instead to rent the apartment on Union Street. Rachel had feared that she would not manage by herself and while this incident seemed to prove that she had been right, all Rachel cared about now was that her grandmother was alright as her heart was full of guilt and regret at letting the disagreement fester to the point where they hadn't spoken for so long.

When she reached the reception desk she inquired about her grandmother's condition and within minutes a doctor was paged and came to speak with her. Rachel was relieved to hear that she wasn't too badly hurt and the doctor informed her that they would be keeping her grandmother for a day or two's observation. They were currently organizing a bed for her up on the wards and in the meantime she could see her in the cubicle in the ER. A nurse came to take her to her grandmother and also filled her in on the kind neighbour who had accompanied her to the hospital and had helped greatly in calming her down so that they could treat her. The nurse also informed Rachel that the same neighbour had stayed with her grandmother while waiting for her arrival and was still in with her. Rachel thanked the nurse and pushed the curtain aside nervously, not quite sure what reception she would get from her grandmother considering how heated their last conversation had been and after the length of time that had passed since they had spoken last. Rachel was taken aback and deeply moved at the sight that met her eyes.

Her grandmother was asleep and looked pale and fragile. Rachel's heart sank at the sight of her beloved grandmother and she vowed in that instant to apologize for her stubbornness and to make it up to her whatever it took. Sitting in the chair beside her bed still holding her grandmother's hand and also asleep was a young man around her own age she reckoned. He certainly didn't match the image that she had envisaged in her mind while listening to the voice message. She had imagined someone older, perhaps bourne from the fact that most people of her generation sadly wouldn't have gone to such trouble for an elderly neighbour as he had. He had a certain boyish charm about him and his wavy hair framed a youthful and handsome face. She thought to herself that he must certainly be a very special human being to have looked after her grandmother as he had. While he looked very uncomfortable sleeping as he was in an upright chair, he also appeared to be fast asleep and again Rachel felt bad as he had probably gotten very little sleep taking care of the person that it had been her responsibility to look after. Rachel felt bad waking him but felt that he had been put to enough trouble already so reaching out gently she put a hand on his shoulder and spoke softly.

"Mr Keller ... Mr Keller!"

Steve woke with a start and it took him a few seconds to reorient himself as to where he was. Seeing Mrs Peterson in the hospital bed he remembered that he was at the hospital. He had slept soundly and thankfully nightmare free and wondered to himself if it was because he had finally spoken of his angst with someone or if pure exhaustion had caused it. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes he saw the young lady that had woken him. He had thought that perhaps it was a nurse rousing him from his slumber but seeing that the young lady wore no nurse's uniform he quickly realized that he was finally in the presence of Mary's granddaughter. Now fully awake, Steve quickly felt embarrassed at being caught sleeping. Also realizing that he was still holding her grandmother's hand he awkwardly released it and bolted upright, a move he instantly regretted as the stiffness in his neck muscles had worsened while he slept due to the awkward position he had slept in. Steve always prided himself in his well-groomed appearance and suddenly realized much to his horror that he must look a right state. Brushing a hand through his hair to hopefully tame it back into some form of order the young man stood up and offered his other hand in greeting to the young lady who now stood in front of him looking quite amused at the young man's discomfort with his current situation.

"You must be Ms Peterson, I presume. I'm Stephen Keller. Nice to meet you. You'll have to forgive my appearance I'm afraid. I don't usually look like ... Well that is to say that I don't ... Oh man! Let's just say it's been one hell of a night! " Steve stammered and seeing the amusement on the young woman's face he couldn't help but grin too as she took his hand and shook it.

"Please don't worry. You look fine all things considered. I can never thank you enough for what you did for my grandmother though. Thank God she's ok. When I heard your message I was worried. You were very kind to look after her for me until I got here. I hate to think of what would have happened if you hadn't found her when you did ..." And with that her voice broke as she suddenly realized that things could have been a lot worse had this young man not found her grandmother when he did and tears came to her eyes as it dawned on her that she mightn't have been given the chance to apologize and make it up to the sweet old lady who meant so much to her.

Seeing the young woman upset, Steve quickly guided her to the chair and sat her down and reaching behind her to a small table he found a clean tissue and handed it to the young lady to wipe her tears with.

"Hey, hey now. Your grandmother is going to be fine. You don't want her to see you upset now do you? She's one tough lady. It would take more than a little fall to keep her down. She's really going to be pleased to see you. She's been asking for you."

Grateful for the comforting words, Rachel dried her eyes with the tissue and smiled at Steve.

"I wish I could believe that ... We haven't ... kept in touch lately exactly."

"I know. Your grandmother told me what happened. Look it's really none of my business but from the little I've come to know of your grandmother she's a very independent lady. I think she just wants to stay that way as long as she's able to." Then seeing Rachel look up at him intently and mistaking her look for one of annoyance he said. "I'm sorry ... look it's really not my business. It's something you two need to work out between the two of you but she will be thrilled to see you." Steve finished and looked away slightly embarrassed.

Realizing that he didn't want to appear to interfere in their disagreement Rachel put her hand on Steve's arm and spoke softly.

"No, please go on. You seem to understand the situation better than I do to be honest. I guess I've never really listened to what my grandmother wanted. I was just hurt that she wouldn't come to stay with me and I guess I couldn't see past that."

"Well, from what she's told me I just think that she can't bear to become a burden to anyone. I mean she knows that it's going to inevitably happen some day but until it does she just wants to manage herself. I think that maybe you just need to put yourself in her shoes and see how you'd feel in her place." With that Steve smiled and thought to himself "God Steve! Now you're starting to sound like Lenny!"

Then Steve happened to glance up at the clock on the wall and saw that it was twelve twenty pm! Dear God! Had he really slept that long?

"Oh man! Is it twelve twenty?" Steve asked in a panicked voice double checking his wrist watch.

"Yes. What's the matter? " Rachel asked seeing the young man so alarmed.

"Oh man! Mike's gonna kill me! I'm really sorry Ms Peterson but I have to run. I'm late for work and my boss is not going to be impressed! It was really nice meeting you and I'm sorry I have to rush off like this. Please tell your grandmother I said goodbye when she wakes up and tell her to take it easy and I'll see her again soon."

"Oh, of course! I understand. I hope you won't get into too much trouble because of us and thank you again for everything."

"No problem. Take care." Steve said as he rushed out through the curtain only to return seconds later to retrieve his forgotten jacket much to the young woman's amusement and this time he nodded his goodbyes smiling and looking slightly embarrassed again and hurried out of the ER and down the hospital corridor putting his jacket on as he ran.

As Steve rounded the corner into the Hospital lobby the double doors in the distance opened and the figure of Mike Stone entered looked frazzled. Seeing Mike, Steve stopped where he stood and running a hand through his hair he cursed his luck. Could this day get any worse? he thought. As Mike caught sight of Steve he rushed towards him like a man possessed and Steve thought to himself

"Oh,oh! Now I'm for it!"

Before Mike reached him Steve threw his hands up in a defensive motion.

"Mike. I can explain ..."

But before he had a chance to say anything else Mike had reached him and grabbed him gently by the two shoulders. Slightly out of breath from his sprint across the lobby and with worry distinctly audible in his voice he looked Steve up and down assessing him for signs of injury.

"Are you ok? What happened? Where were you hurt?" Mike asked nervously still trying to figure out what had caused Steve to be rushed off in an ambulance.

Slightly taken aback by his partner's odd and unexpected reaction and feeling all eyes on them in the lobby, Steve pulled back out of Mike's grip and reassured the older man.

"Mike? What are you talking about? I'm fine! "

"You're not hurt?" and when Steve shook his head he added "You're not keeping something from me are you?"

"NO! Mike? Wait a second. How did you even know I was here?"

"Well, I went to pick you up for work and when you didn't answer I spoke with your neighbour!"

"Anderson?"

"No, no. You know that lady. The one in the building beside yours. Oh you know the one! She always ... well ... she always seems to wave over at me and say good morning if she sees me knocking at your door."

"Mrs Corcoran?" Steve asked, a sly smile breaking out on his face. "You know I think she likes you Mike! I think you better watch yourself there."

"Don't be ridiculous! She's just being friendly."Mike said indignantly."And anyway funny boy she said you went off in an ambulance early this morning!"

Still chuckling, Steve suddenly realized what Mike had been so agitated about.

Oh Mike. Mike! You never listen to what Mrs Corcoran says! She's a "curtain twitcher"!"

"A curtain what?" Mike said confused.

"A "curtain twitcher" Mike. She's a gossip. She gets stories wrong and then she passes on her wrong information to anyone who'll listen Mike. You have to take what she says with a pinch of salt"and with that he couldn't contain his laughter any longer and laughed heartily.

Realizing that he had just been fooled by the obviously infamous Mrs Corcoran Mike watched Steve laugh and grinned himself despite feeling slightly embarrassed by his predicament.

"Ok, ok wise guy. You like that huh? Me getting fooled by the curtain twitcher."

"Yeah. I love it! " Steve said still chuckling.

"Well alright hotshot, if Mrs Corcoran is so wrong how come you're here at San Francisco General then? Huh? Explain that to me when you're quite finished laughing" Mike asked.

"Oh, she was right about that part. I came by ambulance early this morning" but seeing Mike's face change back to a worried expression he quickly continued." HOWEVER I wasn't the patient Mike! I came with my neighbour downstairs. You remember I told you about the sweet old lady that moved in about six months ago? Well she had a bad fall and she has a fear of hospitals so I came with her in the ambulance and stayed with her until her granddaughter got here a while ago. I didn't call you because I figured I'd be back home before it was time for you to collect me. It just didn't work out like that in the end. Sorry Mike."

Mike listened carefully to Steve's explanation and saw that Steve was genuinely contrite. He couldn't help feeling relieved and pleased that Steve hadn't been hurt and was inwardly immensely proud of his young partner for his selfless act of kindness. However it wouldn't hurt to let the young man stew a bit longer for scaring the heck out of him and jeering him over the unwanted attention of one " Mrs. Corcoran".

"Well buddy boy, if you've quite finished playing the Good Samaritan perhaps you'd like to join me down at the Bureau to work on our caseload? You do remember the two bodies we saw last nite?"

Then looking Steve up and down, he took in the rare sight of a disheveled looking Steve. No tie, the top button of his shirt undone and the funniest part of all were the slip on shoes with no socks! Allowing himself a wry grin he asked.

"You starting a new fashion trend buddy boy?"

Steve knew how out of character he looked and how funny he looked with no socks on so he smiled back, realizing very quickly that Mike was merely getting his own back for the "Mrs Corcoran" comments and defensively yet lightheartedly replied.

"Hey! I was in a hurry! Besides I had thought I'd get back home to tidy up remember? Look I know we're running late and I know it's entirely my fault but could we PLEASE just stop at my place for ten minutes so I can clean up before we head down to the office? I promise I'll work late and make up the hour I lost."

Mike admired the young man's work ethic and what was even more pleasing to Mike was the fact that the kid seemed to be a bit more upbeat than the last time he had seen him. Maybe his good deed had helped him more than he realized. So deciding to let him off the hook he answered.

"You know after the scare you just gave me I ought to make you go down to the office as you are!" then seeing the brief horrified expression cross Steve's face he quickly countered. "However seeing as you were being a Good Samaritan we'll stop at your place first. Come on hotshot!" and with that Mike turned and headed back out through the double doors with a smiling Steve just a step behind.

As the two men exited into the afternoon sunshine, Mike stopped briefly and turning to Steve asked.

"You really stayed with the old lady until her granddaughter arrived huh?"

"Yeah!" Steve replied smiling at his partner.

"You know that was a real nice thing to do buddy boy. I'm proud of you!" Mike said patting Steve affectionately on the shoulder.

Secretly touched by Mike's words but hating fuss of any kind Steve blushed slightly and casually shook off the compliment by swatting his hand in mid-air.

"Aw, anyone would have done the same. Besides my good deeds are only starting for today. How about I drive? What do you say?"

"You up to it? You probably didn't get much sleep again last night."

"Yeah. I'm ok."Steve said smiling and held out his hand for the keys.

Mike passed the keys over and both men sat into the car. As Steve put the key into the ignition he turned to Mike and said grinning broadly.

"You were really worried about me weren't you?"

"Just drive the car will you?" Mike answered impatiently.

"You know if you play your cards right I'll look after you too in your old age!" Steve said cheekily.

"Why you ..." Mike said swatting playfully at his young partner and then thundered "DRIVE!" as Steve turned on the engine and grinning even wider drove off in the direction of Union Street.


	7. Chapter 7

**Act of Remembrance**

Chapter 7

Within a few minutes the two detectives had pulled up outside Steve's apartment in Union Street. Steve turned off the engine and turned to face his partner.

"I'll just be ten minutes. Do you wanna come up or are you going to wait in the car?"

The sun had burned off the last of the fog coming off the Bay and the day was in direct contrast to the day before. The midday sun was getting warm and despite having the windows open the car was hot and stifling. Mike fingered his collar and made his decision in that instant.

"No, it's getting too hot to wait in the car! I'll come up with you!"

"Ok." Steve answered smiling. He knew Mike disliked intense heat much preferring the salty sea breezes from the Bay keeping the temperatures bearable. As they exited the car Steve locked it and they made their way up the steps to Steve's apartment. As they reached his front door and Steve fumbled with the keys in the lock, a head appeared out a window of the building next door and a shrill voice shouted over to them.

"I see you found him!"

"Yes. Thank you!" Mike shouted back and then under his breath he muttered to Steve "Hurry up and open that door!"

As Steve opened the door he shouted "Afternoon Mrs Corcoran!" but he didn't get to say anything else as Mike shoved him forcibly inside.

"That infernal woman!" Mike spoke gruffly when they were inside and Steve couldn't help but laugh.

"Very funny wise guy! Just go and get ready! We have work to do remember?"

"Ok, ok. I won't be long." Steve said still chuckling as he headed for his bedroom.

Mike sat down on the couch and waited but he didn't have to wait long. True to his word Steve appeared within a few minutes looking back to normal. Dressed in his jacket and tie, his hair combed neatly in place, his gun and handcuffs attached to his belt and his wallet and badge tucked into his inside jacket pocket.

"Ok. Let's go!" he said to Mike as he entered the living room and standing up Mike joined him and they hurried back down the steps and into the car and were soon on their way back to Bryant Street.

As they entered the bullpen it was just approaching one o'clock and while Steve headed over to his desk, removed his jacket and placed it on the back of his chair Mike headed into his office and hung up his coat and fedora. Looking back out at Steve, Mike was pleased to see that his mood seemed to have improved but again wondered what it had all been about. Before he had a chance to ponder on it more, Steve had turned and headed into his office.

"Ok. What do you want to do first? Do you want me to start typing the second report or will I head down to forensics and see what they have come up with from last night?" Steve asked enthusiastically.

"No. Let's head down to Bernie first and get a lowdown on the victims first. See what we're dealing with. He should have made a start by now."

Steve's enthusiasm waned and making a face he whined.

"Aw Mike. Really? You know I hate the autopsy parts. Couldn't we just wait until he has the reports ready and read them?"

Mike grinned at Steve's squeamishness. It was true that as long as he had known him he despised having to attend the autopsies and always opted to stay as far away from them as possible. But on this occasion Mike wanted to get a head start on these cases so wasn't prepared to wait until the reports were typed up and ready.

"Sorry buddy boy! I want to get moving on these cases so waiting for reports is not an option. Come on! Besides you haven't had breakfast yet have you?"

"No, But what's that got to do with anything?"

"Well, then you won't have to worry about being sick with an empty stomach will you?" Mike said teasingly as he placed an arm around Steve's shoulders and steered him out of his office.

"Very funny!" Steve said knowing full well that Mike was enjoying his discomfort.

With Steve still protesting the two men started to head for the door to head down to the ME's office when the phone on Steve's desk rang. Grateful for the distraction and feeling as if he had literally been saved by the bell,Steve spoke to Mike.

"Hold up! I better get that. It could be something important relating to the cases." Steve said smiling as he raced back to his desk and picked up the receiver all the while still grinning in Mike's direction.

"Hello. Inspector Keller. Homicide ?"

As the voice on the other end replied the smile on Steve's face vanished and he quickly turned his back on Mike and spoke more sombrely and quietly into the phone.

"Oh hi! Yeah. No, don't worry, I haven't forgotten. No, I'll be there. Ok. Yeah, Tomorrow at three o'clock. I remember. Do you need me to pick you up? Ok. Are you sure? Alright. Yeah. Thanks for the call."

Then glancing over his shoulder at Mike and seeing his curious expression he turned back to the phone.

"Listen, I've got to go. Ok. I'll see you then. Take care. Bye"

Steve hung up and still with his back to Mike he took a few deep breaths. While he hadn't forgotten, the events of last night with Mary had distracted his thoughts away from what had been bugging him. But after that phone call his emotions were once again dragged firmly back to the past and for a split second he almost regretted picking up the phone. It had been nice to feel ok again even if it was just for a while. Now he was back feeling miserable and now on top of that he felt guilty for having been distracted from his misery so easily.

Heading back over to Mike and feeling slightly uncomfortable under Mike's scrutinizing gaze, Steve spoke.

"Come on, we better get to Bernie before he goes to lunch.'

Mike halted him for a split second with a firm grip on his arm alarmed at how one phone call seemed to send him spiralling back into his depression. The dark cloud again almost visible over his head.

"Was that case related buddy boy?"

"No, no it was personal. Look let's go ok? You know how stroppy Bernie gets if you make him miss his lunch. "

And easing out of Mike's grasp he headed out the door towards the ME'S office. Mike stood for a few seconds staring at the phone on Steve's desk wondering who it could have been to cause such a reaction. He vowed in that instant to look into that question later but for now he was going to have to keep a very close eye on his partner. A very close eye indeed.

Exiting from the bullpen Mike had to almost jog to catch up with Steve and when he finally caught up with him they were just outside the ME'S office. Entering the outer office, they greeted Bernie's secretary Susan and she informed them that Bernie was in the autopsy room working on the second victim from the previous evening, the first victim's autopsy having been completed earlier that morning.

Thanking her they entered the next door and passed through the Morgue where all the dead bodies were stored in cold storage drawers. The chill of the room and the knowledge of what lay behind the drawer doors always gave Steve the shivers and it was definitely his least favourite place to be. In the middle of the room was an empty morgue table and as Steve caught sight of it the memory of that fateful morning returned and he remembered in vivid detail the sight that met his eyes that day. His heart started to beat wildly at the memory and he felt his breath catch in his chest. He remembered how Mike had stood behind him quietly that day with his hand supportively on his shoulder and how eventually it had all become too much to bear and how Mike had steered him outside for a breath of fresh air. A hand on his shoulder again now made him jump and returning to the present he glanced over his shoulder to see Mike's worried face studying him closely.

"What's the matter buddy boy? You look like you've just seen a ghost! Are you ok?" Mike asked alarmed at the sight of Steve staring at the empty morgue table lost in his thoughts.

With Mike's words uncomfortably close to the truth Steve pulled himself together, forced a smile and answered as normally as his shaky voice would allow.

"Yeah, I'm fine. This place just gives me the creeps. That's all!"

Before Mike had a chance to continue the conversation Steve headed for the door on the other side of the room which was wide open. As he stepped into the Autopsy room, Steve instantly regretted the one quick glance he took to his right when he saw Bernie poised with his saw about to open the skull of the corpse on the examining table. Luckily Bernie was intent on his task and hadn't seen Steve entering so Steve ducked back out the door he had come through almost barreling into Mike in the process.

Embarrassed by his squeamishness and fighting a sudden wave of nausea that had washed over him at the sight he had just seen Steve didn't say anything but just avoided his partner's gaze. Extremely worried by his young partner's erratic behaviour and his pallor Mike poked his head through the door and saw Bernie engrossed in his current task and part of Steve's behaviour was clearly obvious to Mike. Looking back at his partner and placing an understanding hand on his shoulder Mike spoke sympathetically.

"Alright buddy boy. Why don't you wait here in your usual spot and I'll go talk to Bernie. Ok?"

Steve nodded gratefully to Mike.

Still not entirely happy by the green tinge in Steve's face Mike asked again.

"You sure you're ok now?"

"Yeah ... yeah I'm ok Mike. I'll wait here for you." Steve answered more shakily than he would have liked.

Accepting that Steve obviously needed a minute or two to pull himself together Mike patted his shoulder and headed into the Autopsy room to speak to Bernie leaving Steve sheepishly and restlessly standing outside the door.

Steve was glad when Mike left as he was finding it hard to pull himself together. Steve nearly always stood in this exact spot and waited for Mike to return when Bernie was in the Autopsy room and often thought that listening to the autopsy being performed was probably worse than witnessing it first hand. As he heard the sound of the saw cut through flesh and bone another wave of nausea washed over him and with the empty morgue table and his memories still haunting him to his left Steve prayed that Mike wouldn't be too long! Another crunch of bone and the searing sound of the saw and Steve fought back the bile that rose in his throat ! Pull yourself together Steve! he thought to himself. In the chill of the room, Steve's fast breathing was almost visible and as the sounds of the autopsy continued Steve broke out in a cold sweat and the room felt like it was closing in on him. In that instant, Steve realized that it was no use! He had to get out of there! Without a further thought Steve turned and left the ME's office at high-speed, not even stopping when Susan asked if he was alright but instead knowing he needed to get to the mensroom down the hall and fast!


	8. Chapter 8

**Act of Remembrance**

Chapter 8

**Meanwhile...**

As Mike had entered the Autopsy room, Bernie hadn't spotted him at first. The procedure he was performing was a delicate one and he had to avoid distractions. As he finally spotted Mike out of the corner of his eye he held up one hand to halt Mike where he was and Mike dutifully obeyed and stood perfectly still while Bernie completed the task at hand. Then turning off the saw and removing his eyewear he greeted the older detective.

"Ah Mike! I wondered when you were going to surface. I completed the first autopsy earlier this morning and Susan is just typing up the report and I've done the preliminary exam on victim No.2 here and had just started the main autopsy. I'm afraid I won't have the written report for this one until later this evening. Where's your partner in crime? Outside the door as usual?" Bernie said smiling.

Mike chuckled. "Yes. I don't think he'll ever make it fully into this room. So what can you tell me about our victims Bernie. Just a quick run down. I know you're a busy man."

"Ok Mike. Well victim No.1 was the body found in the alleyway. Male Caucasian. In his late fifties, early sixties I'd estimate. Straight forward cardiac arrest Mike. No doubt. No foul play indicated. His heart just gave out. Life on the streets and judging from the level of alcohol in his system, his fondness for alcohol was a prime factor in his death. No case for you there. However there was no identification on him when he was found so for the moment he remains a John Doe."

"Well, that clears that one up. What about the second one?"

"Ah, I thought you'd never ask! This one is a different story altogether. Victim No 2. is also male ,hispanic, approximately aged in his late teens,early twenties. Death caused by a bullet to the back of the head. I'd estimate a 32 calibre but I won't know for certain until I retrieve the slug which I was about to do when you so politely interrupted. He was dead before he hit the ground from massive brain trauma. However the interesting part is there are no signs of him being restrained and no defensive wounds whatsoever. Now I'm not the detective here but that would indicate to me that he was either expertly surprised or ..."

"He knew his killer! " Mike finished Bernie's sentence for him.

"EXACTLY!" Bernie replied enthusiastically.

"Very good Bernie, very good! You know you've been in this job so long you're actually starting to think like us!" Mike replied wagging a finger at the smiling Medical Examiner. "Have we got a name for this fellow yet?"

"No, not yet but I sent the fingerprints of both bodies down to Records first thing this morning so we might get one soon however I think I might have something else useful for you." Bernie announced excitedly.

"Come closer and look at this Mike. There were no other distinguishing or unusual marks on the body except for this!"

Mike had a stronger stomach than Steve's when it came to being around autopsies but never the less he did hesitate a little about getting too close to the victim. However Bernie sure was excited about something so momentarily forgetting his discomfort he leaned over to see what Bernie was showing him. There as plain as day on the front left forearm was a tattoo of a black and red spider!

"It might end up meaning something or at the very least it might help with identifying him." Bernie explained.

"Can you get me a picture of this Bernie?"

"I already have. It's out with Susan. You can pick it up on your way out along with the first report." Bernie announced proudly.

"You know you never cease to amaze me Bernie!" Mike said admiringly then stepping a little closer and lowering his voice a little he asked.

"Listen Bernie, Have there been any cases lately that have ... well that have affected Steve more than usual ... that you noticed?" Mike asked tentatively.

Bernie looked at Mike curiously.

"Mike , all the bodies that come through my autopsy room affect Steve. You know that! I don't really understand what you're asking me?"

"Have you noticed him taking any particular case lately ... you know ... more personal than others?" Mike rephrased.

Again Bernie studied Mike and thought about the previous few days as requested.

"No Mike, not that I noticed. What's going on Mike?"

"Ok thanks! I'm not sure Bernie. Something's bugging him and he won't talk about it! Just there a few minutes ago he was looking at the Morgue table as if he was remembering something ... well, unpleasant. I just thought that maybe you could throw some light on it for me."

"Sorry Mike. I haven't a clue. Maybe you could get Lenny to talk to him!"

"Are you kidding me? Steve only has to see Lenny and he almost runs in the opposite direction. Why I've seen him take the stairs if Lenny is in the elevator! No! I'm just gonna have to get to the bottom of it myself. Thanks anyway Bernie."

"Sorry I couldn't be more help Mike. ... But if you don't mind I have a bullet that needs retrieving and I want to get it done before lunch. Unless you want to stay and watch? It's a very interesting procedure."

Mike waved his hand." No, that's quite alright. I'll leave that task in your capable hands. You've been extremely helpful as always Bernie. Why you've single-handedly just cut my caseload in half! Thanks! I'll see you" then turning to go he headed for the door.

"Tell Steve I said hi! " Bernie called.

"Will do!" Mike called out but before he reached the door he turned back around.

"Oh and Bernie! ..."

"I know, I know. I'll get the report to you as soon as I can!" Bernie answered, knowing Mike too well and then put his eyewear on as he got back to work.

Mike smiled. "Ok, thanks Bernie!" and just as he got to the door he addressed Steve.

"Steve, alright we're done here. Let's ..." and then he stopped mid-sentence when he saw that Steve was nowhere to be seen. Mike's heart sank as he worried about Steve's whereabouts. Hurrying through to the outer office he was greeted by Susan who gave him the picture of the tattoo and the first autopsy report.

"Thanks Susan. Did you see Steve?"

"Yes, he left about fifteen minutes ago in quite a hurry! He didn't look that well. But he never said anything."

Mike thanked her again and headed out into the corridor. Mike stood and thought. If he hadn't been feeling well where would he have gone? Out for some fresh air maybe? And then looking down the corridor he smiled to himself. Or ... the mensroom? Deciding that was probably the nearest and easiest place that Steve would have found he hurried down the corridor. And for the second time that day he hoped that Steve was alright!

Steve had reached the mensroom earlier and felt like he was going to be violently sick. But as Mike had predicted earlier, as he had an empty stomach Steve only gagged a little and nothing came. Feeling very nauseous and shaky, Steve stood at the bathroom sinks and splashed cold water on his face. Then he wet a paper towel and placed it at the back of his neck. Steve took some deep breaths and after about ten minutes he was starting to feel human again. Washing his hands he looked at his reflection in the mirror and grimaced. He looked awful. Mike would surely notice how dreadful he looked and ask him more unwanted questions. Steve groaned. He would have to get back there before Mike knew he was gone but the thoughts of returning there only made his stomach somersault again. Before he could finish drying his hands the door to the mensroom opened swiftly and in rushed a worried looking Mike Stone. Steve looked at Mike in the mirror and then looked down embarrassed.

"Are you ok buddy boy?" Mike asked tentatively.

Still not catching Mike's eye Steve answered quietly.

"Yeah, I'm ok. I guess I just ...". Steve trailed off not really knowing how to explain what had happened to him to his partner.

"Just let it get to you huh?" Mike proffered.

"Yeah" Steve answered grateful for being allowed such a vague answer.

"Were you ...?" Mike asked cautiously but before he finished his sentence Steve replied.

"No. No. Like you said it was just aswell I had an empty stomach!"

Steve grinned trying to make light of the situation.

"I'm sorry I dragged you along buddy boy. "Mike said guiltily.

"Don't sweat it Mike! So are you gonna fill me in on the cases or are we just gonna stand in the mensroom all day huh?"

Mike chuckled. "Ok wise guy! Come on. Let's go back to my office and I'll bring you up to date. I'll even buy you a coffee as an apology if you're up to it?"

As the two men exited the mensroom Steve replied.

" Sure! If you're buying, I'm up to it! "

And with that they headed towards the elevator and back down to the quiet of Mike's office. As Steve entered and sat down, Mike poured two cups of coffee and having put two dimes in the tin he followed Steve into the office. He put the coffees down on the desk and went and closed the door then sat down in his seat opposite Steve.

Steve sat with his right leg resting on his left knee and was rubbing his eyes with his hand. Mike studied him closely and decided to try to draw him out one more time.

"Tired?"

"Yeah, a little." Steve answered now rubbing the muscles at the back of his neck.

"I guess you didn't get a lot of sleep last night what with bringing your neighbour to the hospital and all huh? Say ... do you want to head home for a couple of hours and catch up on some rest?"

"No, I'll be alright. I just need some coffee and I'll be right as rain!" and with that Steve picked up the coffee that Mike had given him and took a long drink.

Then making a face, he added.

"Mike! How many sugars did you put in this?"

"Three!"

"THREE? Mike I only take one you know that!"

"Well I thought the sugar would be good to settle your stomach and to give you a sugar boost. You looked a little flaky earlier. Go on stop fussing now and drink it up. It's good for what ails you!"

Steve made another face but drank it up anyway not wanting to seem ungrateful.

"So about the victims. What more did you learn from Bernie and please try to sugarcoat the facts like you did my coffee! And spare me any gory details! Ok?"

Mike laughed and spent the next fifteen minutes filling Steve in on what Bernie had told him and then he produced the photo that Bernie had taken of the victim's tattoo.

"Here, buddy boy. Cast your eyes on that. Might be a strong lead as to who our boy is. What do you think?"

Steve took the photo that Mike offered and as soon as he saw it, it triggered something in his memory.

"Mike! I've seen this before somewhere!"

"You have?" Mike answered "Where?" and getting up he came around to Steve's side of the desk and sitting on the desk he watched Steve studying the photo. Mike could almost see the cogs turning in Steve's brain as he desperately tried to remember why the picture was so familiar to him. After a few minutes of silence Mike almost saw a lightbulb light up in Steve's eyes as he became animated and excited.

"I remember Mike! It's a gang tattoo! I was in a black and white then. Oh, it must be five years ago now. We were called to an armed robbery somewhere in the ... Mission District ... I think."

Steve closed his eyes as if it helped him remember better.

"I think it was a gas station robbery. An attendant was killed. When we got there another patrol unit had apprehended two perps at the scene. They were gang members and both of them had this tattoo on their arms. I remember because it was so unusual!"

"That's great buddy boy! Do you remember the name of the gang or the names of the perps?"

Steve again struggled to remember.

"Mike, it was five years ago!"

"I know, I know. I'm asking a lot but they're in there somewhere buddy boy" Mike said tapping a finger on Steve's temple."Look at the picture again. It might spark something!"

Steve studied the picture again and was almost about to give up when like a bolt from the blue it came to him!

"YES! I remember Mike! "Steve exclaimed with pride as he sat up straight in the chair.


	9. Chapter 9

**Act Of Remembrance **

**A/N: I am posting the next chapter a bit earlier than usual today as I won't be able to be online later on. I hope you are all enjoying my story so far and thanks to all those who have left such kind reviews thus far. I do appreciate you taking the time to review. Now here is the next instalment.**

Chapter 9

"The gang was "The Black Widows"!" Steve continued." Hence the spider tattoo and one of them I think was ... Ramiro ...no that wasn't it! Rodrigo! Yeah that was it! Rodrigo ... Fernandez! Rodrigo Fernandez! I'm almost positive Mike. He was the leader. I can't remember the other one. Sorry!"

"SORRY? What are you being sorry for? You've just given us the best leads we've had all day! " Mike exclaimed excitedly. Then looking proudly at Steve he announced. "I told you! You stick with me and you'll make it to the top buddy boy! That was good work!"

Then standing up he went back around his desk and sat down again. Clapping his hands together he smiled broadly at Steve.

"Ok! Here's what we're going to do. I'll go down to Records and see if they've come up with names for our victims and I want you to pull the files on that case from five years ago and find the name of the second perp. Then I need you to head down to Stan and see if he can fill you in on what's happened to the "Black Widows" in the last five years. Ok?"

"Ok Mike I'm on it " Steve said and he got up just as Mike's phone rang.

"Hold on a sec!" Mike said to Steve holding up his hand as Steve went to leave the office and while Steve stood and waited, Mike picked up the receiver.

"Stone, Homicide? Oh hi Captain! Yes. What meeting? Oh that meeting. But that's not today is it? In twenty minutes? Look Captain, I'm flat-out here. Can't we postpone it for a day or two. Ok. No, of course I understand that we can't disappoint the Mayor! Heaven forbid! Alright, alright calm down! I'll be there! Ok. See you soon. Bye."

Mike angrily slammed down the receiver.

"Well, that's all I need! Apparently I've got a meeting in the Captain's office in twenty minutes with the Mayor's aide in attendance! Skowlownowski !

The Captain wants me to fill him in on our caseload for last month. Why didn't they send me a reminder about it? " Mike said gruffly starting to panic as he worried how he was going to compile the data required in the limited time available.

"Calm down Mike! They did send you a memo over a week ago. It was put on your desk! And I typed up the report you need three days ago. It's also buried on your desk somewhere! Mike! How come you've let your desk get so untidy? You normally keep everything so organized. "Steve said rifling through the papers to find the report he had left there.

"I know, I know. I let things slide the last couple of days. I'll sort through it tomorrow. What are you now? The inspector of desks?" Mike asked teasingly.

This made Steve laugh just as he found and pulled out the report he was looking for.

"Very funny! Here's your report Sir! You better not keep Skowlownowski waiting! In the meantime I'll get those names from records and I'll check out those other things too. "

"Ok. I'm sorry you're stuck doing all the legwork. I'll catch up with you as soon as I can. You know I'd rather go on a dinner date with Mrs Corcoran than go to this infernal meeting!" Mike said animatedly.

Steve laughed again and turning to leave Mike's office for a second time he called back playfully.

"Be careful what you wish for!"

Mike laughed too and called out.

"Oh and Steve!"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for typing up this report. I owe you one."

"One? The way I figure it you owe me way more than one!" Steve said laughing."But you're welcome. Oh and tell Skowlownowski what's his name said hi!"

Mike laughed at this too and watched as his young partner tiredly made his way out of the bullpen. He knew Steve was still exhausted after his good deed last night and cursed the fact that now because of this infernal meeting he had just piled extra work on his already tired shoulders. He looked at the report in his hands and flicking through it he shook his head in amazement at the amount of detail and the neatness of the report that Steve had compiled. It never ceased to amaze him how thorough Steve's reports always were. Looking at the clock in his office he reckoned he had about ten minutes to spare so he decided he would try to find out who had called Steve earlier and caused him such angst. Picking up his phone he dialled a number and when the voice on the other end answered he spoke officiously.

"Hi Carla. This is Stone up here in Homicide. Listen I need you to do me a favour. Can you find out for me what the last number was that called Inspector Keller's extension please?"

"Sure Lieutenant . Just hold one moment please!"

Mike waited patiently while Carla retrieved the information he required and familiarized himself with the report in his hands while he waited.

Within a few minutes Carla came back on the line.

"Lieutenant, I'm afraid that all I'm able to tell you is that it is showing up as an internal call."

Mike hadn't been expecting that particular answer so he paused a little before replying.

"Lieutenant? Are you still there?"

"Yes. Sorry. Thanks Carla. Look I appreciate you checking it for me. Bye."

Mike was now even more stumped as to what was going on with Steve but he reckoned that at least it confirmed that it was work related somehow. Checking the clock once more he saw that it was ten to three and decided to head up to Olsen's Office a few minutes early otherwise he knew he would only sit there putting off the inevitable so picking up the report he headed upstairs for another dreaded monthly report team meeting!

**Meanwhile**...

Steve had arrived in Records and was greeted by Officer Barney Gates. He had been in the Records Department for as long as anyone could remember and was well liked among his colleagues. He had a very pleasant jovial manner about him that exuded helpfulness and was always ready to help and assist anyone who came through the door. Smiling broadly at Steve as he entered he greeted the young detective in his usual upbeat manner.

"Ah Steve! I've been expecting you or Mike! I got those fingerprints from the ME's Office this morning and I ran them through the database."

"Afternoon Barney. Did you come up with any names for us?"

"Yes! On both counts! Your first guy the John Doe from the alleyway is one Terry Evans. He's spent his fair share of time over the last couple of years being drunk and disorderly and sleeping it off in our comfortable accommodations! And your second victim has a record too as long as your arm. His name is Antonio Garcia. Age eighteen. All juvenile stuff up to two years ago. Then he seemed to take his criminality to a new level if you catch my drift? Two counts of assault where the victims mysteriously dropped the charges and he was being watched by Vice with links to drugs. I have the two files for you Steve. Just sign on the dotted line and they're yours and let me tell you they make for some pretty dark bedtime reading my friend!"

Steve smiled at the older Officer.

"Thanks Barney. I could use some good bedtime reading lately! "

Steve signed the forms required to remove the files and then sought Barney's help one more time.

"Listen Barney, I need your help with one more thing! I need another file on a case I was present at but it goes back aways and I'm really not sure about all the details. How do I go about finding it?"

"Ooh! That sounds challenging. How far back aways are we talking exactly?"

"At least five years."

"Oh, those records are all on microfiche now. You're welcome to use one of the machines if you like? I have to stay at the front desk but Nancy and Michael are back there if you need help searching."

With that two other detectives came in behind Steve to talk to Officer Gates so realizing that he would have to manage himself Steve thanked Barney for his help and entered into the inner office where the Microfiche files were kept. Sitting down at a vacant machine Steve took a few minutes to familiarize himself with the task at hand. He had often used microfiche in College but it had been a while. After a few futile attempts Steve started to make progress and he started scrolling through dozens of cases. After fifteen minutes of futile searching Steve started to get fed up. He was feeling tired again and the muscles in his back and shoulders were starting to ache. Steve leaned back in his chair and stretched his arms behind his back in a vain attempt to try to loosen the tension. Staring at the screen at the constant scrolling was starting to give him a headache and although he felt like giving up he didn't want to disappoint Mike so rubbing his tired eyes he once again resumed his futile search. A hand on his shoulder startled him and looking over his shoulder he saw the smiling face of Officer Nancy Carter.

"Hey Steve! Looks like you could use some help. What are you looking for?"

"Hi Nancy. I thought you'd never ask!" he said relieved at the offer of help. " I'm searching for a case file dating back around five years ago. I'm a little sketchy on the details but I think it was a gas station robbery, possibly in the Mission District. The perp was a gang leader of a gang called the Black Widows and I think his name was Rodrigo Fernandez. There was another perp but I don't remember his name. Sorry that's all I got! It was a long time ago. I was assisting in a black and white at the time but it wasn't our case."

"Don't be sorry! You've got more for us to go on than most that come in here! Trust me on that!" Nancy said smiling. "Have you cross referenced any of that information from the card system yet?"

Steve looked blankly at the female officer and then looked down ashamedly.

"No ... I didn't. Of course! They had a card system in college too! Oh man! I'd forgotten about the card system. Sorry! " Steve said blushing slightly and feeling foolish.

Nancy felt sorry for the younger detective. Most of the officers that came in to the Records Department were very demanding and never even attempted to try to get their own information. Steve was one of the few Officers who was always mannerly and polite and never condescending. Those qualities always meant that those who worked in the Records department were more willing to help him. Smiling at Steve, Nancy quickly deflected the situation away from Steve's embarrassment.

"Don't worry! We'll find what you're looking for!"

Nancy quickly set to work flicking through drawers of index cards. Steve admired the speed and efficiency with which she searched.

"It would help if you could remember the name of the arresting officers."

Steve racked his brain trying to remember what black and white had beaten them to the crime scene.

"I'm not sure." Steve admitted and then closed his eyes again and tried to remember the crime scene in his head. He could see the gang leader as he resisted arrest. The tattoo clearly visible on his arm. He remembered how strong the guy was and how the officer had yelled for his partner and the fact that it had taken the two offices to restrain him. He tried to focus on the officers and he vaguely remembered one of their faces. "Wait a minute! ... It was Blake. Thomas Blake and his partner was the cop who retired last year. Oh what was his name?"

Steve was struggling again so Nancy offered some help.

"Retired last year? You mean Jefferson?"

"No. No that wasn't him "and then again all of a sudden it came to him."MacKenzie. His partner was Paul Mackenzie!" Steve announced rather pleased with himself.

"Well done. That will make our lives easier. Now we just need to look through the cases of Blake and MacKenzie that date back five years ago and hopefully we will find the one we're looking for."

As Nancy began searching through the cards, she noticed from the corner of her eye how tired Steve looked. Making small talk while she searched she said sympathetically.

"No offence intended Steve, but you look like hell! Have you been burning the candle at both ends again?" she added with a smile.

Steve brushed his hand through his hair and smiled back.

"I wish ... No. Mikes just been working me too hard lately. But don't tell him I said that!"

Nancy laughed but there was something else different about Steve's demeanour this afternoon. Something almost mournful that was blatantly obvious despite his attempts to hide it behind his mesmerizing smile. Something that ran deeper than tiredness. Then she remembered the phone call that she had received a few days ago and instantly she knew what had him out of sorts.

"Steve!"

"Yeah?"

Nancy stopped her searching momentarily and turned to face him. Steve grew slightly anxious by her sudden serious facial expression and wondered what she was about to say.

"Sherry rang me a few days ago and told me about Evelyn's memorial service tomorrow afternoon. It must be hard for you. You know I never got to properly say to you how sorry I was about the whole thing. It was so terrible."

Steve's face fell when she mentioned Evelyn but quickly he brought his emotions back in check and looking anywhere but straight at her he answered.

"Thanks Nancy. I appreciate it. It's hard to believe it's almost been a year huh? Are you going to the service?"

"Yes, me and a couple of the other girls. We owe it to Evelyn. She was a really special person."

"Yeah, she sure was ..." Steve said his voice breaking slightly then clearing his throat he continued. "Well, I guess I'll see you there."

"Is Mike going to the service?"

"I'm not sure ... Sherry said that she rang him but he hasn't mentioned it so I don't know."

Steve was thankful that immediately Nancy turned back and continued her file searching. Discussing Evelyn had caused a lump to form in his throat and the fact that Mike hadn't mentioned the service made Steve believe that he wasn't going and was also one of the main reasons why he was having trouble talking to him about it. Mike had obviously put the whole thing behind him and probably wouldn't understand that he was still having trouble dealing with what happened. Steve had always hated showing weakness in front of Mike. In fact he really wished that she hadn't brought the subject up. He was having a hard enough time concentrating on his work without constant reminders of his misery. He was still lost in his tortured thoughts when Nancy's voice brought him back to reality.

"Bingo! Here it is! You were right Steve. The arresting officers were Blake and MacKenzie. And it was a gas station robbery in the Mission District on March 4th, exactly five years ago. The first perp was Rodrigo Fernandez and he was the gang leader of a gang calling themselves "The Black Widows". The second perp was one Armando Garcia also a member of the same gang. They were both found guilty. Fernandez of first degree murder of the gas station attendant and armed robbery and Garcia of aiding and abetting in both crimes. They were both sentenced and sent to San Quentin. Will I get you a printout of these files Steve?"

"Yes please Nancy. Did you say the second perp's name was Garcia?"

"Yes, Armando Garcia. Why? Is that significant?"

"I'm not sure but with our current victim named as Antonio Garcia it seems a bit too much of a coincidence. Wouldn't you say?"


	10. Chapter 10

**Act of Remembrance**

Chapter 10

"You think they could be related?" Nancy asked as she printed out the files for Steve.

"Maybe! Although it is a common name. Guess I'm gonna have to look into that one."

"Here you go Steve!" Nancy said as she handed him the printouts.

Steve picked up the files from earlier and accepted the printouts.

"Thanks for all your help Nancy. If you hadn't come along when you did I'd probably still be there searching" Steve said with a wide smile."You're a star! I owe you a coffee sometime."

"Don't mention it! And you look like you could use that coffee more than me! I'll see you around Steve."

Steve smiled and said goodbye. As he headed out into the outer office Barney looked up from his work.

"Did you find the file you wanted Steve?"

"Yes, thanks Barney. I'll see you!"

As he headed out into the corridor he checked his watch. It was three fifty pm. He wasn't sure how long Mike's meeting would take, although normally the monthly ones could drag on for two or three hours especially when Skowlownowski was in attendance, but he still had a lot more things to check out.

He still had to check San Quentin to inquire about the two gang members, he had to head down to Stan to find out what he knew about "The Black Widows". He wanted to check the Juvie records to see if the two Garcias were possibly related and in between all that he wanted to ring the hospital and inquire how Mrs Peterson was doing. With all he had to do he suddenly felt really tired and his headache was starting to bother him. A dull throbbing had started right behind his eyes and he rubbed at them hoping to alleviate the ache. Just at that moment he rounded a corner and bumped straight into someone, dropping his files onto the floor in the process. As he frantically apologized and bent down to pick up the files he looked up in horror to see that the person he had bumped into was none other than Lenny Murchison! Boy, Steve thought, there was no end to his bad luck today!

"Sorry Lenny! I wasn't watching where I was going. Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, but you took the harder knock. Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Here let me help you pick up those files."

"No, it's ok, thanks! I got it."

Having gathered up his files and standing up, Lenny caught him by the arm.

"Are you sure you're ok? You don't look great. In fact you look exhausted!"

"I'm FINE Lenny! But thanks for your concern. If you'll excuse me I have a lot to do this afternoon. I have to get going. Sorry again."

With that Steve hurried off down the stairs leaving Lenny watching after him with a concerned look on his face. Steve could almost feel Lenny's eyes burning into his back as he headed down the stairs and wondered if Mike had spoken to Lenny about him. Deciding that he had too much on his mind to worry about that right now he continued on into the Office to the right at the end of the stairs. It was a small enough Office compared to some others and it held the Officers and Detectives of the Gang Task Force Unit. As Steve entered everyone present looked up and greeted him. Steve greeted them back with a smile and headed over to Stan's desk.

"Hey Stan! How's it going? Listen, I know you're probably busy but if you get a minute this afternoon I'd appreciate your help on our latest case. Our victim is a gang member and we suspect gang involvement in his murder. "

"Hmmmm. Sounds interesting. Actually you caught me at a good time. Things are under control for the moment. Take a seat! Looks like you could do with one. Man! You look rough! Tough day?"

"Yeah, you could say that. Tough couple of days and it ain't over yet! And to top it all I have the headache from hell doing it's best to split my skull open!" Steve said wearily as he dropped heavily into the chair beside Stan's desk, placed his files on the desk and proceeded to rub his temples in a futile attempt to banish the merciless pounding that refused to leave him in peace.

"Ouch! Sounds painful!" Stan replied sympathetically and reaching into his desk drawer he produced a box of extra strong paracetamol "Here Steve. Take two of those and you'll be right as rain in about half an hour." and with that he handed Steve the box.

"Aw thanks Stan! You're a lifesaver! My migraine meds are back at my place!"

Steve took two tablets from the box and walked over to the water cooler. Then he poured a cold cup of water and downed the pills in one go.

"I never knew you suffered from migraines Steve!"

"Not too often thankfully! But yeah sometimes they're the bane of my life."

Returning to Stan, Steve sat down and returned the box to his colleague.

"Cheers pal!"

"Sure thing! So what have you got for me?"

Opening his files Steve produced the photo of the spider tattoo and placed it in front of Stan.

"What can you tell me about "The Black Widows"?"

"Whoa man! Now they're a blast from the past! They disbanded oh ...I'd say at least five years ago. Where did you get this from ?"

"From our latest victim!"

"You're kidding me? How'd he buy it?"

"Bullet to the back of the head. Poor guy was dead before he hit the floor."

"Nasty. Execution style huh? Sounds like it's gang related alright. Typical M.O. Actually it's funny you should bring up "The Black Widows" today. About four weeks ago one of our informers said there was a rumour going that someone was trying to reform that gang. But we found no evidence to support it so we put it down to talk and nonsense. Maybe there was something in it after all!"

"Maybe! What can you tell me about the gang in general?"

"Now let's see. If memory serves me right there were five in the gang. Rodrigo Fernandez was their leader, Armando Garcia was the second in command and then there were three others, Lopez, Mendoza and Perez. The top two were apprehended five years ago after a gas station robbery went wrong and an attendant was killed. As far as I know they're still serving time in San Quentin. With the two leaders out of the picture the gang disbanded. Lopez was killed in a drive by shooting a couple of months later. We never caught who did it but we always suspected it was a rival Gang member afraid that Lopez would take over the reins."

"What about the other two ... Mendoza and Perez?"

"Word on the street was that they skipped town after what happened to Lopez. They never showed up on our radar again so to speak."

"Ok, You mentioned a rival gang. What gang rivaled the Black Widows back then?"

"The Barracudas."

Steve chuckled at the strange name. "What can you tell me about them?"

"There were four of them. Their leader was one Esteban Gonzalez. They were a mean bunch. They'd cut your throat without a thought. Folks kept clear of them. I can't remember the other names off the top of my head though but I can look them up for you but I don't think it's going to help you much. That gang disbanded too about oh, three years ago. We haven't had any trouble with them since then. There are all new gangs now Steve. Do you want me to check them out for you anyway?"

"Yes please Stan. I just have one more question. Did Armando Garcia or Rodrigo Fernandez have brothers?"

"I'm not sure. You'd have to ring Juvie Hall. They'd have records about that. Why do you ask that Steve?"

"Oh, just a hunch really. Nothing more. Ok Stan. You've been really helpful. Thanks a lot! And thanks for the painkillers! I think they're starting to kick in. You'll get those names for me?"

"Sure Steve. And you're welcome. I hope you get your man."

Steve got up and retrieved his files and started to leave."Thanks again Stan!"

"Oh and Steve!"

"Yeah?" Steve said turning around.

"You know a good night's sleep wouldn't hurt you know? Instead of bags under your eyes. You've got suitcases man! " Stan said sympathetically.

Steve laughed and bade the other detective goodbye and made his way wearily back up to the bullpen. As he checked his watch it was just after five o'clock. The bullpen was fairly deserted. Lee Lessing was typing at his desk and two other detectives were in the interrogation room with a perp. When Steve entered he passed Lee's desk.

"Lee, is Mike back yet?"

"No. Haven't seen him. The meeting must be still going on. Steve! You look like ..."

"Hell. I know. Everyone keeps telling me! I'm just tired that's all. Man, Mike is going to be like a bear with a sore head when he gets back if he's had to listen to Skowlownowski for the last two hours!"

Steve sat heavily down at his desk and opened his files. He took out his notebook and pulled the phone over beside him. Lee watched him with concern. He really did look out on his feet. Sometimes Steve got so wrapped up in a case that he'd forget to take care of himself.

"Have you eaten today Steve?"

The question took Steve by surprise. He'd been so busy all afternoon that he hadn't even thought of it! Since his purge earlier in the morning and his queasiness after the autopsy he really hadn't felt like anything but thinking of it now he was feeling peckish. He silently kicked himself aswell because his lack of food had probably contributed to his migraine too. Not wanting to lie to Lee he decided to come clean.

"No, not really. I still have a few phone calls to make and then I'll grab a sandwich."

"Oh you will, will you?" Lee queried knowing Steve too well. "Well, I'll tell you what. Why don't I make one of those phone calls for you and then I'll get you that sandwich. Huh? Just in case you change your mind. We better get one for Mike too. He's going to be hungry aswell after that meeting." Lee said walking over to Steve's desk. "And before I forget Nelson from Forensics has been trying to reach you all afternoon. His number is on your desk. Now let me make one of those phone calls for you. Ok?"

Steve smiled wearily up at his friend and fellow detective. He really knew him too well.

"Ok, thanks Lee. Can you ring San Quentin for me and ask about these two guys for me please? See if they're still serving time and who has visited them lately? That would be a big help thanks!"

Lee headed back to his desk to make the phone call and Steve picked up the phone and rang Nelson. When it was answered Steve spoke into the receiver.

"Larry? Hi! Steve here. I got a message saying that you were trying to reach me?"

"Oh, yeah Steve. We think we found your murder weapon from the docks killing!"

"Aw man that's great! Where did you find it?"

"One of the teams found it in a dumpster around by the warehouse at the docks. It's a 32 calibre. We're trying to match it to the slug that Bernie sent us down a while ago. We should have the results soon."

"Larry, that's the best news I've had all day. Good work! What about prints or am I being too optimistic?"

"We're working on that too Steve. With all the heavy rain last night we might be out of luck but if we find any I'll give you a call. Are you back at your desk?"

"Yeah. Thanks Larry. Bye" Steve said as he hung up. Finally they were getting somewhere on this latest case.

Next Steve rang the hospital and inquired about Mrs Peterson and was pleased to hear that she was doing well. He left a message to say that he had been asking for her. Then he rang Juvie Hall and was on the phone to them for over twenty minutes. Lee watched as he scribbled down page upon page of notes and when he finally finished the call Lee noted that he looked very pleased with himself. Steve made two other calls and again took numerous notes. Having got the information from San Quentin for Steve that he was looking for he went over to Steve's desk again and handed him the notes he had taken down.

"You look pleased. You know who the killer is? " Lee asked having seen that look on Steve's face before.

"I have my theory but it's still just a hunch. I haven't got it wrapped up tight enough yet but I'm hopeful that if they find prints on the gun it will prove my theory right!"

"Ok, I'm going to get those sandwiches now. What would you like?"

"Anything at all Lee, thanks." Steve said as he reached into his pocket to get change.

Lee waved off Steve's offering.

"No, my treat! You bought them last time. Listen Steve, after you've eaten why don't you head home and get some sleep? Mike's still not back and you look out on your feet. I'll tell him you went home when he gets back. Huh? What do you say?"

"Lee! Will you stop worrying about me please? It's bad enough with Mike always fussing over me without you starting!" Then realizing that he had been a bit harsh he continued. "Look, I'm sorry Lee. I appreciate your concern. I didn't mean to snap your head off! I want to wait for Mike to run my theory by him and then I'll go home and rest. Ok?"

"Ok!" Lee said patting him on the back and heading out to get sandwiches for them all.

With Lee gone, Steve noticed that he was the only one left in the bullpen and wearily rubbed the muscles on back of his neck. Lee was right. He was out on his feet. Looking at his watch it was five thirty-five and still no sign of Mike! Where was he? Steve opened his desk drawer and enjoying the solitude he took out the picture from earlier and leaning back in his chair he stared at it sadly. As he looked at it memories flooded back to him good and bad and he felt himself getting upset again. Not knowing how long Lee would be he quickly returned the photo to the drawer and closing it he banged the desk with his fist in frustration. Then leaning his elbows on the desk he rubbed at his tired eyes to clear the moisture that had filled them. With all his phone calls made he left the bullpen for a couple of minutes to wire a picture to Quentin and mere seconds later a return phone call confirmed what he had already suspected. Then he proceeded to paperclip all his notes together ready to present to Mike when he got back and as he just finished, he decided it wouldn't be any harm to just rest his head on his arms for a quick minute. Only his exhaustion had other ideas and within seconds he was fast asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**Act Of Remembrance**

Chapter 11

Ten minutes later Lee arrived back.

"Steve, I hope you like Reuben sandwiches. it was all they ..." and looking up he saw Steve asleep on his desk.

Shaking his head he headed over to Steve and satisfied that he was sleeping soundly, Lee decided not to wake him. Forty winks might just do him good. So he headed back to his own desk and returned to his typing. At five minutes past six a very disgruntled Mike Stone entered the bullpen, muttering wildly under his breath.

"Bureaucrats! Never seen a dead body in their lives ...Sit behind their big desks shuffling paper and talking politics ...Spare me!"

Then seeing Lee, he was suitably embarrassed.

"Never become a Lieutenant Lee! Monthly meetings! Torture that's what they are! Have you seen Steve?..." Then looking up he saw Steve asleep at his desk and stopped where he stood.

Lee saw Mike watching Steve and couldn't read his expression. Fearing that he might be mad at Steve for sleeping on duty Lee stood up and put a hand on Mike's chest.

"Mike! Don't be mad at him! He's been working flat-out on the case all afternoon. He's out on his feet. He hasn't even eaten! I told him to go home but he insisted on waiting for you to get back. I didn't have the heart to wake him."

Realizing that Lee had misread his expression and admiring the young detective's loyalty towards Steve, Mike reassured him

"Relax Lee. I'm not mad at him. I know how tired he is. He had a rough night last night. How long is he asleep?"

"Not more than twenty minutes." Lee said relieved that the older detective was aware of Steve's exhaustion.

"He hasn't eaten anything at all?"

Lee shook his head.

"I got sandwiches for us but when I got back with them he was already asleep. I got you one too!"

Lee reached into the brown paper bag and took out his sandwich and then handed the bag to Mike.

"Thanks Lee. Listen! You and Steve are good friends. Has he confided in you about anything that's been bothering him the last few days? "

Lee was slightly taken aback by the question.

"No. He hasn't said anything. Why do you ask? Do you think there's something wrong?"

"I don't know Lee. I just don't know. Something's been chewing on him the last few days but he won't talk about it. I don't think he's been sleeping too good either."

"Well, you know Steve as well as I do Mike. He likes to deal with his problems his own way. Things will work themselves out. He'll talk when he's ready to."

"I hope you're right Lee. I really do."

Just then the bullpen door opened once more and both men turned to see Stan entering. Seeing Mike and Lee, Stan addressed them both.

"Hey guys. Do you happen to know where Steve is? I have that information he wanted."

Both men smiled and pointed at Steve's desk. Stan looked at where they were pointing and saw the sleeping detective. Smiling to himself he spoke to the other two men.

"Oh man! I knew he was exhausted when he came to see me earlier. I guess his migraine didn't help either. Huh?"

Mike and Lee exchanged a worried glance. Mike was the first one to respond.

"A migraine?"

"Yeah, he had a bad one too! I gave him some painkillers cause his meds were back at his place. Anyway will you give him this for me when he wakes up please. I have to run. I'll see you."

Mike took the file off Stan, thanked him and watched as he left the bullpen.

Then turning back to Lee he spoke.

"Ok, that's it. I'm gonna wake him up and drive him home whether he likes it or not! "

Mike headed for Steve's desk and placed the file from Stan down beside the sleeping form of his partner. Then placing his hand on Steve's shoulder he very gently shook him.

"Steve! Wake up sleepy head. Come on now. Wake up."

Steve woke with a start and shot up straight wincing slightly as his neck muscles protested the strange position he had been lying in. Massaging the crick out of his neck with one hand and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes with the other Steve quickly realized that he must have fallen asleep at his desk and looked embarrassingly up at his partner.

"Mike! You're back! Sorry! I must have dozed off while I was waiting for you."

"That's ok. Come on! Grab your jacket. I'm taking you home."

"No Mike! I haven't waited this long for you to get back just for you to drive me home. I want to fill you in on the case. I think I'm close to solving it!"

"The case will still be here tomorrow Steve! You need to get some rest!" Mike said raising his voice a little at Steve's stubbornness.

"Mike! Please! I just want to go over with you what I came up with today! I'm ok. I feel fine! "

Mike shot Steve a look of exasperation. Steve in turn wasn't the least bit phased and in return shot Mike a pleading look.

"Come on Mike. What can it hurt huh? Fifteen more minutes. That's all. Mike? MIKE?"

Mike knew that he wasn't going to get Steve to go home until he had looked at what he had found so in that instant he decided to use the situation to his advantage.

"Ok hotshot! I'll make you a deal. I'll let you show me what you found out if you EAT something!"

Steve knew Mike had him bang to rights so he agreed.

"Ok. Ok. You win! It's a deal!"

"Bring your files into my office and I'll get us two coffees."

Steve made his way into Mike's office and in order to lay out his files on Mike's desk he first had to push aside the pile of clutter that seemed to be building by the day. Steve always kept his desk tidy and Mike normally did too but the current state of Mike's desk hit a raw nerve with Steve. So he called out to Mike.

"Mike! You're going to have to do something about this desk of yours soon. You want me to help you clear it?"

Mike felt bad enough about letting his paperwork pile up the way he had the last few days without feeling even more guilty about letting an already exhausted Steve clear his mess for him so he hurriedly dismissed the idea.

"Don't you worry about my desk. I'll clear it tomorrow like I said I would!

Then he poured two coffees, put two dimes in the tin, tucked the sandwich bag under his arm and brought the refreshments into his office. He put the coffees down and unwrapping the sandwiches he put one in front of Steve and one on his side. Then studying Steve closely he asked.

"How's your headache?"

Steve looked up in amazement at Mike totally at a loss as to how he could possibly know about his headache.

"How did you know I had a headache? You were at the meeting!"

Mike laughed at Steve's astonishment. Still chuckling Mike, explained to a puzzled looking Steve.

"Stan called ... He brought the file you asked him for. He mentioned your headache."

"Oh. Ok!" Steve replied smiling now too. "It's better thanks. Where did you put the file he brought?"

"On your desk."

Steve got up and went and retrieved it and as he turned to head back to Mike his phone rang. Mike watched from his Office as Steve picked it up and answered it. Mike struggled to hear what was being said and only picked up a few phrases here and there.

"Thanks for calling me back ... Hold on please until I take that down ... Is that a current one? ... You said that he has a girlfriend? ... Can you spell that please? Thank you. You've been very helpful."

Mike saw Steve writing furiously in his notebook and then he saw him hanging up, reading through the file that Stan had brought and picking up the phone again and dialing another number. As he waited for the person on the other side to answer he put his hand over the mouthpiece and shouted into Mike.

"Sorry Mike, I just have a phone call to make. I'll be back into you in a few minutes."

And with that someone answered and Steve turned his attention back to the phone. This time Steve seemed to speak lower and Mike couldn't make out any of the conversation. So instead he glanced at the other side of his desk and saw the file that Steve had prepared earlier. He always admired Steve's paperwork. The neatness and organized way he had everything paperclipped in the right order made him smile and also sent a pang of guilt through him when he compared it to the pile of clutter that was now stacked to the left of him.

While waiting for Steve to return he took a bite of his sandwich and took the first paper off his pile. It was a receipt for some dry cleaning he had collected a couple of days before. Shaking his head at it he scrunched it up and placed it in the wastepaper basket. Next a letter he had received from Jeannie a few days before. He smiled as he reread it and then assigned that carefully to the top drawer of his desk. Next a memo about those wanting to take early retirement. The cheek! Mike thought to himself and again scrunched it up disdainfully and filed it in the wastepaper basket. Little did Mike realize that the next small piece of paper he was about to pick up would have revealed the source of Steve's angst but just as he reached for it Steve came back into the office and drew his attention away from the task at hand. Seeing Mike sorting through his clutter as he walked in made Steve smile.

"Well I'm glad to see you've made a start on clearing that paperwork. You know what they say Mike, a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind!" Steve said wagging a finger at Mike and laughing.

"Hey, hey now! You're cruising buddy boy!" Mike said warningly but at the same time he found it hard to be cross with his young partner especially as seeing Steve genuinely laughing at anything was a rare sight the last few days.

"Alright wise guy, are you going to fill me in on this case of ours or would you prefer to catch the killer all by yourself?

"Ok, ok I'm sorry." Steve said still giggling.

Steve then spent the next ten minutes telling Mike the names of their victims,the history of the Black Widows gang, the case that Steve had witnessed five years ago that ultimately led to the break up of the gang and all the rest of the details that Stan had given him. Steve paused momentarily, as his throat went dry and took a big mouthful of his coffee. Taking advantage of the pause Mike spoke.

"Well, buddy boy I am impressed! You have been busy this afternoon."

Swallowing his coffee, Steve grinned wider.

"Oh the best is yet to come Mike! Wait for it! I had Lee ring San Quentin for me. Fernandez and Garcia are still serving their time, both model prisoners by all accounts. So I had the idea to have Lee check who's been visiting them lately. Now Rodrigo has been visited by his younger brother Javier every week and Armando has also been receiving brotherly visits at exactly the same time each week as Rodrigo. That is until this week when neither brother showed up. I'll give you one guess who Armando's mystery brother is Mike."

Mike's eyes lit up.

"Antonio?"

"You got it! "Steve said sitting back smugly in the chair and enjoying the fruits of his labour.

"How can you be sure they're one and the same? It's a fairly common name you know." Mike asked testing his younger partner as he frequently did to keep him sharp and on his toes.

"Now Mike! You know how thorough I am. I wired a picture of our victim to the guards at San Quentin and they gave me a positive ID. They're one and the same. So that got me thinking."Steve said beaming again and pausing for another sip of coffee to quench his parched throat.

"Go on buddy boy. You better tell me your theory before you explode!" Mike said having seen that look of satisfaction on Steve's face during many cases before.

"Ok, now it started as just a hunch but the pieces are falling together nicely Mike so just bear with me ok?"

"Ok! Go on before my cluttered mind gets too distracted!"

"Alright, well I got to thinking. Here we have two brothers who grew up in the shadow of their older brother's gang. You know how younger brothers are. They often look up to their older siblings. They probably even thought that what they were doing was cool. So I checked the Juvie records and lo and behold Javier and Antonio have been in trouble together more times that you count on both hands since they were ten. Mostly petty stuff, picking pockets, shop lifting , car theft, joy riding. That sort of thing. Anyway it struck me that both of these guys came of age over the last month. With the big brothers out of the picture for the foreseeable future and rumours flying that someone was bragging about reforming the Black Widows, what if it was our boys deciding that it was their turn to carry on the family tradition. Now it seems plausible to me that as Armando was the second in command last time it would be only reasonable to assume that maybe Antonio felt it was time a Garcia took the reins this time around. You with me?"

Mike had been leaning back his chair and listening closely to Steve's enthusiastic theory.

"So you think Javier wasn't too keen on the idea and did away with Antonio so he could be top dog huh? That's your theory?"

"Think about it Mike. Javier went missing the exact same day that Antonio was killed. I rang his parole officer and no-one knows his whereabouts. I'm telling you Mike, Javier is our man. Forensics found the murder weapon. They're checking for prints as we speak. I'll bet you a meal in Mamma's that when they call back Javier's prints will be on it !"

"You're pretty convinced it's him aren't you buddy boy? I'm not so sure. Your theory is plausible but it's very thin on the evidence side. Most of what you suspect is pure conjecture. No, my money's on Esteban Gonzalez. He couldn't get the Black Widow's leaders five years ago because they were safely locked up so maybe he heard about the Black Widows reforming and went after the brothers instead. That would explain why Javier has made himself scarce too. Especially after he heard about what happened to Antonio."

Steve's mood deflated a little at Mike's lack of enthusiasm for his theory but nevertheless he remained convinced about Javier's guilt. Mike could see he that he'd curbed Steve's new-found enthusiasm and feared that he might cause Steve to be depressed again so he quickly intervened again before Steve's smile had a chance to fade.

"Now I'm not saying your theory is wrong. I'm just saying that we should keep our options open and not put our eggs in the one basket. Do we know where Gonzalez is?"

"No. He fell off the radar about three years ago so to speak and according to Stan, the Barracudas disbanded just after. The last known sighting of him was out in Oakland so I rang Oakland PD and asked them to check if they had any information as to his whereabouts. They're gonna ring me back."

"Well I'm really impressed buddy boy. You've really done your homework on this one! Mind you, you had it easy, let me tell you! If I had to listen to that hard nose Skowlownowski one more minute I'd be up for murder myself !"

Steve laughed as that image popped into his head.

"If I knew you were considering that I would have come up and helped you!"

Now it was Mike's turn to laugh but his laughter subsided as he caught sight of Steve's untouched sandwich. Eyeing up Steve crossly, Steve saw Mike's expression change and wondered what he had suddenly done to cause the change of mood. Under Mike's glare Steve became uncomfortable and so he asked.

"What? What's the matter?"

"I thought we had a deal?"

"A deal?" Steve asked puzzled and then as he followed Mike's gaze to the uneaten sandwich he remembered. He was kind of hungry but at the same time the droopy sandwich didn't look that appetizing. Seeing Steve's look of disdain as he eyed up the sandwich Mike read the young man's mind.

"Don't worry it tastes better than it looks! Now go on! You're not getting out of here without eating it!"

Steve knew that Mike meant every word so reluctantly picking up the sandwich he brought it to his mouth as his stomach churned and protested. Before he got to take a bite, Steve's desk phone rang and with relief written all over his face, Steve dropped the intact sandwich back on Mike's desk and bolted out the door to answer it. Mike rolled his eyes to heaven at the bad timing of the phone call.

Again he struggled to hear the conversation which barely lasted five minutes but when Steve hung up and appeared back into the office he was beaming from ear to ear. Mike looked questioningly at Steve.

"That was Oakland PD. Looks like my theory is looking good! They pulled the body of Esteban Gonzalez from the bay yesterday evening. He was shot through the back of the head with a 32" calibre! Coroner over there puts his time of death as yesterday morning sometime! They're going to send us over the reports when they're ready."

"Yesterday morning! Well that kills my theory! That means he was dead hours before Antonio!"


	12. Chapter 12

**Act of Remembrance**

Chapter 12

Steve came back into the office and sat back down looking pleased with himself.

"Now don't get too sure of yourself yet buddy boy! Besides you still have that sandwich to eat remember?"

The mere mention of the sandwich itself was enough to wipe the smile off Steve's face and picking it up again he glanced out to his phone hoping that for a second time he would be saved by the bell but this time his luck had run out. Guessing by his glance what Steve had been thinking Mike quickly dispelled any hope he had of rescue.

"And if that phone rings again before you eat that I'M answering it! OK?"

Realizing that he had no choice this time Steve took a bite from the sandwich and chewed it for longer than necessary. Mike was right. It did taste better than it looked but his appetite seemed to have deserted him of late and try as he did, he could not swallow what was in his mouth. Mike staring at him while he ate was NOT helping either so he decided on a different tactic and took a mouthful of coffee to wash it down. After several more tortuous bites later and an entire cup of coffee Steve put down the remnants of the sandwich that were left absolutely certain that he could not stomach one more bite. His stomach was somersaulting again and he felt slightly green around the gills. He only hoped he had managed to eat enough to keep Mike happy and off his back even temporarily.

Trying to hide from Mike his stomach's current battle to dispel what Steve had forced into it, Steve picked up a napkin and wiped his mouth. A furtive sideways glance at Mike revealed a concerned looking glare trained in his direction. Damn it! Steve thought to himself. Mike never misses a thing so Steve would have to redirect his attention. Deciding what to say next Steve put down the napkin and broke the silence.

"There! You happy now? I've eaten!"

Mike never batted an eyelid but continued to study Steve uncomfortably. Glancing at Steve's sandwich which was only about two-thirds gone and having seen the discomfort with which Steve had dispatched it, Mike felt slightly guilty as he realized that Steve had forced himself to eat it for his sake only. The kid looked like hell and despite the fact that he was trying his best to disguise his discomfort it didn't take a trained eye to see that he was struggling to keep down what he had eaten. Mike's worry returned and for the third time in as many days he again wondered what had caused Steve's lack of appetite. Steve was normally always hungry and while he always admired the healthy food choices Steve made he very rarely had to worry about him not eating at all. He could see that Steve was getting uncomfortable with his staring so he finished the last bite of his own sandwich and then spoke.

"You still queasy from earlier?"

"NO!" Steve said a little too forcefully so lowering his tone he continued. "No. The migraine just upsets my stomach a little that's all. It'll settle down soon."

Steve rubbed his midsection and hoped that Mike would change the subject. Mike wasn't fully convinced by Steve's reasons but decided to let it drop for now. Leaning back in his chair he turned the conversation back to the case much to Steve's relief.

"Well it looks like we had better find this Javier Fernandez of yours and have a little word with him? Seeing as you seemed to have been so thorough in your research this afternoon I guess I can presume that you have an idea where he could be?"

Smiling broadly again at the fact that Mike knew him so well and the fact that the attention had been taken away from his upset stomach Steve answered confidently.

"Yeah, I have one or two ideas!"

Mike smiled at Steve and then decided to use his current good mood to probe a little further into the cause of Steve's recent mood swings.

"You know I met Lenny coming back from the meeting a while ago. He said you two had some sort of collision earlier. "

Again Steve's smile faded momentarily only to return again quickly as Steve masked his discomfort at the turn of conversation.

"Yeah, I was in a hurry! I guess I wasn't watching where I was going." Steve explained more nervously than he would have liked. "Did you two talk about anything else?"

Mike knew that Steve was using the same probe tactics that he was and smiled. The boy sure cottoned on fast.

"Well, he said you looked very tired and stressed. He was a little concerned about you." Mike said studying Steve's reaction intently with his piercing blue eyes.

Again painfully aware of Mike's intense scrutiny Steve shrugged his shoulders and dismissed Lenny's concern casually.

"Hey, you know Lenny. He's always concerned about everyone. It's his job! Hell, he wouldn't be happy unless he was fussing over someone or other."

Then sensing that Mike definitely wasn't buying his cover story he decided a change of subject was in order.

"Say Mike, tomorrow's Saturday and seeing that we both have the afternoon off, do you have any plans made for the weekend?"

Mike again smiled at Steve's obvious change of subject but he allowed him to change it all the same as his curiosity was awakened by Steve's question.

"No nothing much really. I thought I'd come in here in the morning and clear this desk of mine. Then tomorrow afternoon I thought I might do a spot of gardening. Those rose bushes of mine need pruning and the back needs a bit of tidying up too. I never seem to get around to it anymore."

Mike was sure that he saw a fleeting look of disappointment cross Steve's face but as was usual with Steve his smile quickly returned to mask his true feelings. Wondering if perhaps he had wanted Mike's help with something tomorrow afternoon Mike inquired further.

"What about you. Have you got plans?"

Steve's smile faded slightly as he remembered his plans for the following afternoon. But not wanting to draw too much unwanted attention to himself and seeing as Mike obviously had no intention of going Steve again answered casually.

"Yeah, I have plans for tomorrow afternoon but they shouldn't go on too long so if you want I could swing by your place afterwards and give you a hand. Maybe we could get a pizza or something then for dinner. What do you say? "

"Sure! That would be great! But if you have a date tomorrow afternoon I wouldn't want you cutting it short on my account."

"No. No, it's not a date. Just something I have to do for an old friend."

Steve finished his sentence with a far away look in his eye and Mike again was at a loss as to what was going on in his young partner's head.

"Steve! I know you said that Lenny is always concerned but ... Should I be concerned?"

Looking up at Mike's unexpected question and knowing that Mike was genuinely worried about whatever was bothering him, Steve wondered if perhaps he should use this opportunity to explain his upset and get it out in the open. Looking around at the empty office Steve spoke softly.

"No. There's nothing to be concerned about. It's just that ... Well, you see tomorrow ..."

Just then the phone rang again on Steve's desk and drew Steve's attention from what he was trying to say. Steve looked at Mike and they exchanged a look of exasperation at the constant ill timing of that phone. Steve stood up to go and answer it. Mike felt that Steve was finally opening up to him and was annoyed by whoever the caller was. Not wanting to stop the conversation for fear that Steve would clam up again Mike called him back before he made it to the door.

"Steve! Let it ring! They'll ring back or leave a message if it's important. You were saying about tomorrow?"

Sure enough the ringing stopped and Steve stood where he was and looked back around at Mike.

"Yeah, I was just saying ... that tomorrow is ..."

Again the ringing started again more persistently. Steve gave up.

"It's no big deal Mike. I better answer it. It must be important!"

Steve left to answer the phone and Mike fumed at another lost opportunity. He had been so close to getting to the bottom of Steve's upset and with the small phone message notelet just beside his left elbow he was actually closer than he realized.

He heard Steve talking excitedly into the phone and stood up and crossed his office to see what the fuss was about. Mike didn't realize that as he stood up the phone message notelet had fallen from the pile beside him and flittered down beneath his chair. As he came into earshot he heard Steve's side of the conversation.

"Oh man! That's music to my ears! Thanks Larry. I appreciate it! I owe you a cold one! Ok. You'll send me up the report? Cheers pal. Bye"

Steve hung up and turned to Mike grinning like a Cheshire cat.

"Well you look like the cat that got the cream! Good news?"

"Oh yeah! That was Nelson from Forensics. They could only manage to get a partial print off the gun because of the amount of rain that fell last night but we caught a break! There was one bullet left in the gun and they got a full print off the casing! It belongs to one Javier Fernandez and the slug they took out of Antonio was fired from that gun. They confirmed it as the murder weapon and they're checking as we speak to see if it is the same gun used on Gonzalez. I knew it was him Mike!"

Mike grinned as he saw the pride on Steve's face.

"You love it when you're right! Don't you?" Mike said wagging a finger at Steve.

"Absolutely!" Steve said still smiling and then he swung into action.

"Well what are you waiting for? Get onto that Judge friend of yours and get us a warrant. I just need to make one more phone call to check the address I have and we'll go try to find him and pick him up."

Steve was all fired up and ready to go as he picked up the phone and started to dial but Mike cut the phone off and spoke officiously.

"Wait a minute now! Hold your horses will you! It's seven twenty in the evening! I'll have a hard time trying to get a hold of Judge Rowland at this time and you're in no fit state to go and pick up anyone especially a possible double murderer! Now let's just set things in motion and we'll go find him first thing tomorrow morning! Ok?"

"No! Not ok Mike! Aren't you the one who always taught me to "strike while the irons hot" to quote your exact words. He could be halfway across the States by tomorrow morning. Come on Mike! Didn't you tell me once that Judge Rowland plays bridge on a Friday night. Just tell him it's an emergency! I have a strong hunch as to where Fernandez will be Mike and so far today my hunches haven't failed me. Mike? MIKE? Please Mike. I'm ok for this! Let's wrap this up and get this creep behind bars before we call it a night. What do you say partner?"

Mike stood and studied his partner. The forty winks, the mostly eaten sandwich, the coffee and the confirmation that his hunch had been right seemed to have given him a new lease of life! Mike wasn't sure though how long his new-found energy would last and still worried that he wasn't up to the task at hand. Nevertheless it was good to see Steve all fired up and full of his normal youthful enthusiasm so going against his gut instinct and always unable to resist Steve's puppy dog eyes, he reluctantly went along with Steve's plan. Steve had stood waiting earnestly for Mike's answer with the best pleading face he could muster.

"Ok ok hotshot! You win! I'll try to get the warrant but Judge Rowland is NOT going to be pleased with me disturbing him on his bridge night!"

"Come on Mike. Just use that Stone charm of yours and you'll have him eating out of the palm of your hand." Steve said beaming from ear to ear as he again returned to his task of dialling his phone.

Ten minutes later, Mike emerged from his office and saw that Steve was just finished his call and was busy writing something in his notebook. At Mike's return he looked up questioningly.

"Well, did we get the warrant?"

"Has the Stone charm ever failed us?"

" I never doubted you Mike."Steve said still buzzing from pure caffeine and adrenaline.

"Ok. Your turn. Did you get us an address for this hunch of yours?"

"Sure did. Now I have his home address but I think that's the last place he's gonna show but just in case I sent Harris and Lochner over there to check it out and stake it out. Now apparently he has a girlfriend in the Mission District. Her name is Consuela Ortega. She lives in apartment 1092 in a building on 16th and Valencia. She works as a waitress in a diner and her boss said she never turned up for work today! I think that's where he's at and if he's not I think it's safe to assume that she'll know where he is."

Mike stood in admiration of the younger detective.

"How did you find out all that so quickly?"

"I have my sources and you're not the only one who can use charm to get what he wants you know? " Steve said laughing as he stood up and proceeded to put on his jacket. "Now come on! Let's go! We have an empty cell downstairs with Javier Fernandez' name on it!"

The one thing that never failed to amaze Mike was how infectious Steve's enthusiasm was. Grabbing his trench coat and fedora he followed Steve out of the bullpen and down to the car. As Steve got in the driver's side and placed the key in the ignition, Mike had barely sat into the passenger side and shut the door when Steve was already in motion.

"Take it easy now Steve! You don't want that new-found energy of yours to peter out too soon now do you? We'll get him. Don't worry!"

" Sorry! You're right! How do you wanna play it Mike?"

"No sirens! We don't want to draw attention to ourselves if he is hiding out there. And let's not underestimate this guy. If he's killed two people in cold blood he could be capable of anything! Ok?"

Steve glanced over at Mike while driving and nodded his understanding. With Steve's excellent driving and his good knowledge of shortcuts it wasn't long before they pulled up across the street from the building in question. Looking at the rundown apartment building Steve gestured to Mike that was indeed the place.

"You know most of the occupants in that building aren't too friendly around cops Mike. Fernandez mightn't be the only murder suspect hiding out there for all we know." Steve said cursing himself slightly for allowing a hint of nervousness to creep into his voice.

Mike picked up on his change of tone and those piercing blue eyes again turned to look straight at Steve causing him to squirm uncomfortably in his seat.

"Yes! You're right. So stay alert in there and watch your back. As a matter of fact we'll watch each other's backs. Ok? Are you sure you're up to this?"

"Yeah, yeah. Course I am. Let's go!" and without further discussion Steve exited the car and started to cross the road with Mike right behind him not fully convinced by Steve's answer and with a sinking uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.


	13. Chapter 13

**Act Of Remembrance**

Chapter 13

As Steve and Mike approached the building there were three young men in their early twenties Steve reckoned, sitting on the steps. As Steve went up the first couple of steps the three men moved closer together and blocked his way. The taller of the three, stood up directly in front of Steve while the other two blocked Mike's path. Mike watched all three carefully, his hand hovering near his holster just in case, as the brave one stood face to face with Steve.

"You lost muchacho? You know, you two don't look like you belong around here. You see we're a very close neighbourhood and we don't take kindly to strangers. Maybe you two should get back into your fancy car and head back to wherever you came from."

Not even flinching Steve stayed courageously where he stood and while his heart was pounding wildly in his chest he kept his cool exterior intact.

"Could you excuse us please? You see you're kind of in our way and what we're here for is quite frankly none of your business. Now if you want some friendly advice from this stranger I suggest all three of you go take a nice long walk. The exercise would do you good."

Steve could see the young man's jaw twitch in anger at his bravado and felt the tension rise between them. He readied himself for an attack of some kind knowing that Mike was watching his back. The young man spoke again more menacingly this time.

"Now you listen to me amigo ..." but before he could finish his sentence Steve had interrupted him.

"First of all I am not your amigo and secondly unless you want to take a ride downtown for loitering with intent I suggest you take my friendly advice and take that nice long walk."

As he spoke he pulled his jacket aside and revealed his badge still vigilant for any further signs of aggression both from the front or from behind him. Mike also kept a watchful eye fearful that while he was on the outside of the group flanked by two of them, Steve was in fact surrounded. He kept his hand close to his weapon, ready and willing to use it if things got nasty. However much to Mike's relief, the tall fellow seemed to realize that Steve was not someone to be trifled with and putting his hands up in mock surrender he moved aside and beckoned to his two friends to do the same.

"Hey man! Be cool! We want no trouble. We'll be on our way. You both have a nice day officers!" he finished with a tone of sarcastic contempt and all three passed down the steps jostling past Mike in the process and down the street. Steve kept watching them until they were well down the street and then turned to look at Mike.

"You ok buddy boy? That was pretty tense."

"Yeah, I'm ok. Let's just hope they don't have more friends inside though. Huh?"

"Like I said buddy boy, keep your eyes peeled in here and watch yourself!"

Again Steve nodded at Mike and they entered the front door. The flat they were looking for was about six flights up so they slowly and carefully made their way up the many flights of stairs. As they passed, doors were slammed shut and kids that had been playing on the landings were picked up by alarmed parents and carried inside. Their mere presence seemed to cause alarm among the residents and Steve had to admit that they did stick out like sore thumbs. As they reached the sixth floor slightly out of breath Steve saw the number of the flat they were looking for. This landing seemed to be eerily quiet compared to the others and had a certain foreboding about it. Mike and Steve exchanged a nervous look between them and Mike pulled Steve to one side of the door and whispered.

"You knock but keep alert. I'll watch your back. If she answers try to draw her out. If he's in there he might shoot first and ask questions later so be careful! This guy is dangerous! Now use that charm of yours buddy boy!"

"Ok ..." Steve whispered back and couldn't help but feel apprehensive as he watched Mike pull his gun and stand off to one side out of sight of the door opening.

Steve's heart was pounding in his chest but he knocked twice on the door and stood slightly back just in case. They listened closely. At first everything was quiet and then they could just about hear whispered voices. The whispers were too low to make out and seemed to be in Spanish. Next they heard footsteps and then someone seemed to fumble with the locks on the door. The door opened on a chain and a young hispanic woman peeped out. From the glimpse that Steve could see of her he noted that she appeared to be roughly in her twenties with dark flowing wavy hair. She had beautiful brown eyes but try as she did she failed to hide the fact from Steve that she had a dark bruise over her left one. She looked terrified and Steve immediately felt sympathy for the young woman who by her appearance and demeanour appeared to be held there against her will. Steve's anger grew inside at the thought that this creep had also struck this young woman. It was a cowardly trait that made Steve's blood boil. Staring at Steve she spoke nervously.

"Hello ..."

"Good evening Ma'am. Are you Consuela Ortega?"

"Yes. And who ... are you?"

"Well Ma'am, I'm Inspector Steve Keller, SFPD and I need to ask you some questions about the whereabouts of a friend of yours, Javier Fernandez. Would that be ok?"

At the mention of his name a fleeting look of horror crossed the young woman's face and Steve could see tears appear in her eyes. Swallowing nervously she spoke with pleading in her voice.

"I'm sorry. Now is not a good time! But I haven't seen him for many weeks now. I ... I think he's gone to visit friends in San Diego. Please could you come back another time?"

Steve could hear the urgency in her voice and knew that she was in danger. He risked a casual sideways glance at Mike and could see that Mike was of the same opinion. He was in there probably pointing a weapon at her as they spoke. Quickly forming a plan of action in his mind he decided what he would do. Looking reassuringly at the young woman he spoke casually.

"Sure. I can come back another time. No problem. Let me just give you my card so you can ring me if you hear from him."

Steve took out a business card and a pen and proceeded to write something on it against the wall. Mike knew that Steve's numbers were already printed on it and so wondered what he was writing. Handing the card to the nervous young lady he watched her intently. She read what he had written. "Is he in there?" and looked back up at him, tears now falling freely down her face. Nodding her head she couldn't bring herself to speak.

"Oh, forgive me ! I forgot to write down my home number for you too."Steve said as he took the card back off her and wrote something else on it. Then handing it back to her he reached under his jacket and opened the clip on his holster casually.

Again she took the card and this time was written. "Take off the chain carefully and open the door enough so that I can get you out and prepare to duck! Trust me! I can help you!"

As Consuelo read the card more tears fell down her cheeks and when she looked back up at Steve, he could see the fear and uncertainty in her eyes.

"Do you think you could do that for me?"Steve asked and then he paused for effect to let her know that he was asking her to trust him. Then he continued for the benefit of her captor." I mean call me that is!"

Very shakily she answered uncertainly.

"I ...think so."

As she spoke she reached up casually and slid the chain off the door and then in one swift moment she opened the door a little wider and ducked down. With equal speed Steve grabbed Consuela's arm and pulled her to safety behind him just as gunfire erupted. One bullet struck the door and Steve heard the second bullet whizz past his ear and hit the wall opposite as Consuela screamed hysterically. Mike ducked back too to avoid the gunfire and then looking over at Steve and Consuela anxiously he shouted over to them.

"Are you two ok?"

Steve quickly looked at Consuela who despite the fact that she was shaking violently and sobbing uncontrollably seemed to be unharmed and nodded to Mike that they were fine.

Then Mike yelled out.

"Fernandez! Give yourself up! Don't make this harder than it has to be! Put down your weapon and come out with your hands up!"

The only answer he received was another bullet aimed in their direction striking the door frame this time.

Steve looked at Mike anxiously.

"I think that's a "no" Mike!"

With Consuela safely out of harm's way and still sobbing behind him, Steve used his foot to kick open the door. When no more gunfire came Mike looked at Steve and gestured for him to enter as they normally would. Steve dived in on the floor with his gun poised while Mike brought up the rear. The room was empty so getting up quickly Steve raced into the adjoining room in time to see Fernandez getting out onto the fire escape.

"MIKE! HE'S HEADING UP ONTO THE ROOF!" Steve shouted out to Mike and proceeded to climb through the window after him.

Mike entered the room just as Steve made it out onto the fire escape too and shouted after him.

"Be careful! I'll get us backup and cover the street until they arrive!"

As Steve climbed the metal steps to the roof after the shooter, Mike returned to the landing. Reaching down and helping Consuela up on her feet he put an arm around her shoulders and spoke softly to her.

"You had better come with me young lady just to be on the safe side."

Mike led Consuela carefully and quickly down the stairs, down the outside steps and over to their car. Opening the back door he sat the young woman on the back seat and then reaching in to the front he hastily grabbed the radio and called for back up. Having told Consuela to stay put until help arrived he then quickly glanced across the street at the rooftop to see if he could catch sight of Steve and Fernandez.

**Meanwhile...**

Across the street, Steve had quickly climbed the steps until he reached the roof. As he stepped out onto the roof he stood quietly for a moment to see could he catch sight of Fernandez. Keeping low, Steve hurried over behind the cover of some pipes. Listening carefully and looking around he couldn't see or hear any sign of the shooter. He was starting to curse himself for losing their suspect when he caught sight of a skylight a little bit away. One of the window panes was broken and for some unexplained reason his mind was taken back to the window in Sherry's flat that he had broken to save her from Oren Prentiss just a year ago. He shook his head to clear his mind of it. He couldn't afford to think of that awful time. Not now! Getting distracted now could get him killed! As he desperately tried to dispel the demons in his head, he heard a noise just over to his left and without warning Fernandez bolted from behind an air vent and raced towards the far side of the roof. Pulling himself together as quickly as he could Steve stood up and pointed his weapon at the fleeing man.

"FERNANDEZ! STOP OR I'LL SHOOT!"

The suspect turned and pointed his weapon at Steve.

"DON'T DO IT !" Steve yelled.

The exact words he had said to Oren Prentiss ! Steve's concentration slipped for just a second but unfortunately for Steve it was just enough time for Fernandez to discharge his weapon at Steve and Steve felt a shooting pain in his left side. However, high on adrenaline, Steve barely flinched and fired his weapon too hitting Fernandez in the right shoulder as he turned and ran again. The suspect stumbled forward but quickly recovered and continued to run. As Steve went to follow, Fernandez turned and sent another bullet in his direction barely missing him as he ducked again behind cover.

Breathing heavily and feeling an annoying stinging sensation in his side Steve pulled his jacket aside and checked for damage. The bullet seemed to have just glanced his side from what he could see, so satisfied and relieved that it was probably just a crease he turned his attention back to apprehending his suspect.

Judging from the glimpse of the revolver that he had seen in the shooter's hand and counting in his head, Steve reckoned that he had only one bullet left so hoping that he had counted right Steve again got up and chased after Fernandez. As he caught sight of him again he looked in amazement as Fernandez ran and jumped off the edge of the building and landed heavily on the rooftop opposite. Steve knew that in order to continue the chase he would have to make the same jump and normally he would have jumped it without a second thought but as he came to the edge he looked down into the alley below and his breath caught in his throat. They were at least seven stories up and the gap was fairly wide. Fernandez had gotten up and although he seemed to be struggling from his gunshot wound he had made it to the stairwell door in the middle of the rooftop opposite. Steve knew that he had to move fast or he would lose him. Fernandez seemed to notice Steve's reluctance to jump and stopped at the doorway and shouted across to Steve.

"Hey! What's the matter pig? You turning chicken?" and with that he laughed.

Steve's anger flared and gave him the motivation he needed. So giving himself space to get up speed, he raced towards the edge. He would have made it too with a clear head but as he ran Evelyn came to his mind again and tortured by his demons he allowed doubts to enter his head and the split second hesitation that followed meant that as he leapt from the building's edge he fell inches short of the other side and in panic he grabbed out and luckily caught the fire escape railing. Dangling seven stories up in the air, Steve's life flashed before his eyes as he heard the suspect belly laugh again and shout.

"Have fun hanging around pig! "

Then he heard the bang of the door. And a panicked shout from the alley below.

"STEVE!"

Steve made himself look down and he saw Mike at the entrance to the alleyway below.

"HOLD ON!"

Steve saw Mike disappear again obviously on his way to help but as his arms started to ache and his side started to burn Steve prayed that Mike would make it on time and that he wouldn't meet Fernandez on his way up!


	14. Chapter 14

**Act Of Remembrance**

**A/N: I didn't want to keep you all hanging too long so here is the next instalment! Enjoy!  
**

Chapter 14

Steve's arms were aching and he didn't know how long he could hold on for so he decided that he had better try to help himself while he waited for Mike. Cursing his stupidity in allowing himself to get into this situation in the first place Steve tried to swing himself sideways so that he could get a foot up onto the railing and haul himself over but it wasn't as easy as it appeared. The swinging motion and the height that he was up just served to make him feel dizzy but he knew that the only alternative was grim so he persisted and on his fifth attempt he managed to get a foot hold against the railing. It then took whatever strength he had left to push himself upwards towards the roof top edge. Next came the hard bit. He would have to let go of the railing and reach up to the edge instead. So closing his eyes and feeling the fear of falling drain him he took a leap of faith and letting go with one hand he reached up and grabbed the edge with first one hand and then both. Thankfully still managing to maintain his foothold he then pushed himself upwards again. He was shoulder height above the edge when he started to feel confident that he would make it but as he got one full arm over the edge disaster struck and his foot slipped. Now hanging more precariously from the concrete edge Steve felt himself losing his grip and knew he was in serious danger. With his strength running out he feared that this was it and as his arm slipped further he let out a panicked yell just as an arm reached down and grabbed him.

"I've got you!"

Looking up Steve saw Mike's worried face and with Mike's added help from above he managed to regain his foothold and within minutes he had managed to get over the top as he rolled down onto the rooftop and lay for a few seconds on his back on the concrete breathing heavily, relief flooding his body at his last-minute rescue.

Immediately Mike was kneeling down beside him, his heart also beating wildly. Mike had caught sight of Fernandez' jump and waited for Steve to follow but when he had seen Steve miss his mark his heart had almost stopped. Seeing the young man he cared for like a son dangle precariously from the railing and knowing how exhausted he was Mike's heart had filled with dread. Mike had never climbed as many flights of stairs as fast in his life and when he had reached the rooftop he caught sight of Steve managing to get himself up. Feeling temporarily relieved, the emotion hadn't lasted long as he had seen Steve slip and heard his panicked yell. Rushing over he had thanked God he hadn't been too late and was grateful that he had been able to help him up and to safety. Now that Steve was out of danger, Mike felt drained aswell by the emotional torment and the exertion that it had required. But he also felt a second emotion. Anger! Mike was mostly angry with himself for allowing Steve to talk him into pursuing Fernandez when Steve had clearly not been up to the task but also he was angry at Steve! Angry because he had persistently failed to confide in him and angry at him for risking his own life so recklessly despite all the people who cared for him.

"Are you ok?" Mike asked worried despite the rage and the anger and annoyance that was building inside him.

Steve nodded still trying to calm himself down after his very close call.

"Yeah ... I think so ...Thanks for the help"

Steve rolled himself gingerly to one side and stood up shakily with Mike standing up too and holding his arm to keep him steady.

"What happened?"

"I lost him Mike ...Sorry! But he's wounded. I think I got his shoulder. Didn't you meet him on the way up?"

"No ... but then I was little bit preoccupied! I meant what happened with the jump?"

"I don't know. I guess I just misjudged it." Steve answered and the casualness with which he answered only made Mike's anger reach fever pitch.

"YOU MISJUDGED IT?" Mike yelled.

Taken aback by the anger in Mike's voice Steve didn't feel up to a full-blown argument so he again nodded and hoped that Mike wouldn't take it too much further.

"Yeah!"

"DAMN IT STEVE! I've seen you make jumps like that a dozen times in all the time we've known each other! You could have made that jump in your sleep! SO WHAT HAPPENED?"

Starting to get riled by Mike's attitude Steve felt his own stubbornness and anger rise too.

"Well I guess if I could jump it in my sleep the fact that I was awake must have been a factor in my near miss then!" Steve said sarcastically.

"Don't you use that tone with me! You could have been killed!"

"Don't you think I know that? What do you want me to say?"

"You weren't up to this and you know it! Damn your stubbornness Steve!"

"Aw come on Mike! STOP TREATING ME LIKE A CHILD !"

"WELL MAYBE I WOULD IF YOU'D STOP BEHAVING LIKE ONE!" Mike shouted back.

"BACK OFF MIKE! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! YOUR CONSTANT FUSSING IS SMOTHERING ME!"

Both men stood staring at each other, out of breath and both shaking from the anger and from the fright they had both had. In that instant both men saw the hurt in the other one's eyes and realized they had said far more than they should have but they had crossed a line and Mike was the first one to speak.

"Alright! I'm going to do just that! As of this moment hotshot you're off the case! I'm putting you on forced leave and I don't want to see you back at the office until you get your head straight! NOW GO HOME!"

With that Mike turned and stormed off across the rooftop. Steve's jaw dropped when he heard Mike's words and he stared in disbelief as he heard Mike taking him off the case! Realizing he had said hurtful things in the heat of the moment he quickly tried to make amends.

"Aw Mike! COME ON! MIKE! You can't take me off the case! MIKE ! I'M SORRY! ALRIGHT? HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET HOME?"

Mike just kept walking and didn't even respond. Realizing that Mike was just too mad to reason with right now Steve gave up and inwardly cursed himself for causing Mike to fall out with him.

"Nice one Steve!" he chastised himself, suddenly feeling drained as his earlier energy depleted and his adrenaline levels dropped.

Looking down and seeing that his handcuffs had come off his belt when he had rolled onto the roof earlier Steve bent down gingerly to pick them up and as he bent down dark red droplets of blood fell onto the concrete below. Startled by the sight and becoming slightly panicked again Steve became suddenly aware of a strong throbbing pain in his left side that almost robbed him of his breath. He hadn't been aware of it what with the adrenaline and then the argument with Mike but now it was making its presence felt, this time refusing to be ignored. Steve suddenly felt very weak and his legs buckled and he fell down on his knees. Pulling his jacket aside he saw the large bloodstain that covered his side and saw it dripping through the material of his shirt and realized that it was not just the simple crease he had hoped that it was! He was in trouble again and he needed to get Mike to come back. But how? When Mike was in that mood he could be awful pig-headed. Steve saw that Mike was almost at the stairwell door and knew he was running out of time. Pressing his left hand firmly against his side and biting back the groan that threatened to escape his lips at the agony that action had caused Steve called out to Mike again.

"Mike!"

Unfortunately with the pain he was in, it hadn't come out of his mouth as loudly as he wanted it to. Mike had heard him though as without looking back he had waved his hand at Steve in a gesture that told him that he was NOT interested in any further conversation at the minute. Starting to feel slightly woozy Steve felt he had one last attempt to alert Mike to his predicament before Mike had left the roof or before he possibly passed out so having one sudden clear lucid moment Steve thought of the one word that might save him. Mustering up whatever energy he had left he gritted his teeth against the pain in his side and shouted as loud as he could.

"HELP! ..."

Mike had stormed off angrily after their argument but the further across the rooftop he had walked the more his anger started to cool down. He had been extremely hurt by Steve's statement that the deep concern that he showed for his young partner was "smothering" him! However as he headed for the stairwell door he began to feel guilty for being so hard on the young man considering he had just been saved from certain death seconds before. And he had to admit that at times he did treat Steve like the son he never had and admitted to himself that it could be construed by Steve as treating him like a child. However still smarting from the heated words that Steve had used he reckoned it wouldn't hurt to let his partner stew for a bit and had continued walking. Even when he had heard Steve's initial shouted apology and heard him calling his name, he still felt that it was best to put some distance between them and allow the situation to cool down for the time being. However as he reached the door he heard Steve shout for help and froze on the spot! Help? Why was he asking for help? Mike had turned and looked over to where Steve had been and immediately alarm bells went off in his head. Steve appeared to be kneeling and leaning forward in some form of distress. Mike's gut instinct told him that something was seriously wrong and without further delay Mike ran back towards Steve, worry starting to tear at his heart at what he might find when he reached him.

Steve had watched helplessly to see if the word he had chosen had worked! Shaking his head to clear his vision a little he swore that he saw Mike stop walking and hoped that he wasn't just wishful thinking but as he felt fresh blood ooze through his fingers he shook with pure relief when he saw Mike turning and running back towards him.

When Mike reached him he knelt down beside him and was horrified at how pale he looked. Not knowing what was wrong Mike wondered if he was suffering from delayed shock at his near death experience.

"Steve! Steve what is it? What's the matter?"

"I'm sorry Mike I thought it was just a crease. Honest!"

"What? What are you talking about? What crease?"

Steve lifted his hand and pulled the jacket material aside and revealed his bloodied side to Mike. When Mike saw the extent of the bloodstain and the stark realization that Steve had been shot sunk in, his heart skipped a beat!

"Dear God Steve! Why didn't you say something? Mike asked making sure this time that he kept his tone more questioning than hostile.

"It happened on the other roof. We kind of both fired at the same time. I thought it was just a crease. It hadn't bothered me until you left. When I bent down to get my handcuffs blood started dripping from it. "Steve explained and hoped that Mike wouldn't be further annoyed with him for keeping his injury concealed.

"Alright, alright. Let me take a look at what we're dealing with. Ok? You're going to have to lie down for me. And I need you to move your hand for me so I can lift your shirt."

Dutifully obeying his partner Steve lay down on the concrete and lifted his hand from the wound and immediately felt more fresh blood ooze from his side. As Mike tugged at the shirt material Steve winced and sucked in his breath. Through gritted teeth he spoke in a pain filled voice.

"Easy Mike. Easy!"

"Ok now. Take it easy! I'll be careful." Mike reassured the young man anxious to see the extent of the damage the bullet had caused but also keeping a very close eye on his partner, deeply concerned by the amount of pain he appeared to be in and the speed in which the blood seemed to have drained from his face. Before he had a chance to check the wound Steve grabbed at his hand.

"Mike ... I'm sorry for what I said. I was out of line. You were right. I wasn't up to it. I'm really ... sorry Mike."

"Now, now, we both said and did things we shouldn't have. Let's not worry about that now. We need to check you out and get you some help. Now try to lie still and let me see how bad it is."

Mike tore the shirt material and was alarmed at the amount of blood that was free-flowing from a nasty looking wound on Steve's side. Dismayed Mike quickly figured that his handkerchief was not going to be of use on this occasion. So having already rendered the shirt unusable Mike tore another section off the end and pressed it on the wound causing another pain filled groan to escape Steve's lips.

"Ok, ok now. I'm sorry buddy boy. But we have to stop this bleeding."

"Mike ..." Steve spoke shakily. "How bad is it?"

"Well, you were right, the bullet went past you but it tore a piece out of your side in the process. The good news is there's no bullet in you but the bad news is its bleeding pretty bad. We need to stop it before you lose too much!"

Then seeing the amount of pain and discomfort Steve was in he decided to try to lighten the mood.

"You know if I didn't know better I'd say you were trying to copy me you know!"

Steve looked at Mike confused.

"What?"

"Well that's exactly the same side and type of wound I got from the Cobras that time. Remember?"

Steve did indeed remember that incident very well. In fact it would forever be permanently etched in his memory as he had tried desperately to locate and rescue his partner. Steve chuckled as he realized that it was indeed a coincidence that they had both been shot in the same side causing similar injuries by different gang members but as his side burned Steve's smile faded and again he gritted his teeth against the pain.

"Mike ...it hurts!"

"I know buddy boy. I remember it only too well. Just hang in there. We have to get you off this roof! Can you make it down the stairs with my help do you think?

Steve nodded bravely and with Mike's help he was soon up on his feet. Having instructed Steve to keep the shirt piece pressed firmly to his injured side with his right hand he put Steve's left arm around his shoulders and with his right hand around Steve's waist they made their way as quickly as they were able to the stairwell. There were two dodgy metal flights of stairs down from the rooftop before they reached the first landing of apartments. As they made their way down Mike watched Steve carefully as every step downwards that his young partner took seemed to send a jolt of pain through his side. Bravely trying in vain not to alert Mike to the intense pain it was causing him he struggled on however as they came down the last flight of stairs onto the first landing Steve's head began to spin and blackness threatened to close in on him.

"Mike ... Mike I gotta sit down. I feel like I'm going to pass out!"


	15. Chapter 15

**Act Of Remembrance**

**A/N : I am not a Spanish speaker so I apologize if any of the Spanish dialogue in this chapter is incorrect. I did my best to get them right.  
**

Chapter 15

Having Steve collapse on him was the last thing Mike wanted so he quickly sat Steve down on the last few steps.

"Alright, sit down here and try to stay with me buddy boy. I'm going to try to get someone to let me use their telephone to see where that back up is and to get an ambulance. Ok? Look at me now? Can you stay with me?"

Steve nodded unconvincingly which only worried Mike more. Heading for the first door nearest to where Steve was Mike knocked loudly. After a few moments an elderly hispanic woman opened the door on a chain. Mike produced his badge and spoke.

"Good evening Ma'am. Police. I'm sorry to disturb you this late but my partner's been shot and I really need to use your telephone to get some help. Can you help me please?"

The old lady looked frightened and looked blankly at him and in that moment Mike wasn't sure if she fully understood him at all. Trying to remember the few words of Spanish that he knew he continued.

"Hablas Inglés por favor?"

The old lady shook her head.

"No ...very ... little."

"Ok ... Policía! " Mike said pointing to his badge. "My partner is bleeding ... sangrando!" Again Mike pointed over to where Steve was." I need to use your telephone ... el teléfono por favor?"

Looking over at where Mike said his partner was she saw the pale young man sitting on the stairs and then saw the bloodied shirt he was holding on his side. Gasping with shock the elderly lady covered her mouth with her hand and exclaimed.

"Dios Mio!"

Then looking back at Mike she saw the worry and concern that was etched on his face. Taking the chain off and opening the door she took Mike's hand.

"Si ... teléfono." and the lady pointed into her living room.

Mike squeezed the old lady's hand, thankful to her for trusting and helping him.

"Gracias!"

Just as Mike went to hurry in and use the phone, Steve called out to him weakly.

"Mike?"

Mike doubled back and bent down to Steve. Not liking the glazed look in his eyes he spoke firmly but tenderly.

"Steve! This kind lady's letting me use her phone. I'm just going to call for help and I'll be right back. Ok? Hold on! Everything's going to be alright. Ok?"

As Steve nodded, Mike checked his side and could see that the wound was still bleeding.

"Steve! You need to press this tightly on the wound no matter how it hurts. Ok?"

Mike felt a light touch on his shoulder and turned to see the kindly lady handing him a towel. Touched by her kindness Mike smiled at her and accepting the towel gratefully he again thanked her. Mike put the towel in Steve's hand and pressed it against the wound. Then standing up he spoke to the lady again.

"Could you stay with him for me while I go call for help please? Em ..."

Mike didn't know how to say any of that in Spanish and was getting frustrated but the lady touched his arm and answered him in broken english.

"Si ... You go ... I stay."

Mike smiled his thanks at the woman and raced in the open door to use the telephone.

The old lady stood beside Steve and watched him closely. Steve felt very uneasy and uncomfortable . His side was really painful and Mike had left him for the time being. The old lady stood beside him with her hand on his shoulder. Steve's spanish was on the same par as Mike's so he didn't feel in his current weakened condition able to attempt a conversation so instead he just smiled his gratitude to the older woman and prayed Mike wouldn't be too long.

As he sat on the steps, he looked around. The building was very old and run down and poorly maintained. The plaster was peeling off the walls and there was a damp and musty smell that was making him feel nauseous. The landing was very poorly lit and Steve felt great empathy with the people who had no other choice but to live in such wretched conditions. He noticed that there were five doors on the landing and reckoned the inside of the flats probably weren't much better maintained. He noticed graffiti on the walls and then his eye caught something on the floor just a little ways in front of him. There was something spilled and leaning slightly over it appeared to be blood! It was too far away from him to be his and as he squinted his eyes more he could see a trail of it leading up the landing! It was still wet so it was fresh and as he followed the trail with his eyes it led to a doorway and on the frame was a distinctive bloody hand print! Steve's heart skipped a beat as he realized that it had to belong to Fernandez! Dear God! Their suspect was just yards away from them. He had to alert Mike! He was in big trouble. Panicking slightly while at the same time keeping his eyes fixed on the door the danger possibly lurked behind Steve let out a panicked yell.

"MIKE?"

The old lady kept a firm hold on his shoulder and alarmed by his shout tried her best to calm him.

"Back soon ...Mike back soon."

"No ... you don't understand. You need to go back inside. Please get Mike for me and stay inside."

The old lady looked at him puzzled and placed her hand on his forehead obviously assuming that his current rant was as a result of a fever due to his wound. Frustrated and greatly worried about his predicament he tried again to explain.

"Mike ...por favor."

"Si ... Mike back soon!"

Seeing that she was not understanding him he gave up trying to calmly explain as at any second Fernandez could reappear.

"You're in danger! You need to get back inside. Please! Listen to me! It's not safe out here!"

But before he could say another word he heard a creak and turning his attention back to the door he saw it start to open slowly! Then Fernandez burst through it with his weapon drawn and pointing it directly at Steve he shouted.

"Die Pig!"

Steve had only seconds to react and with his reflexes slowed due to blood loss he had to use every ounce of energy he had left and dragging himself up and dropping the bloodied towel in the process he shielded the old lady pushing her with him around the side of the staircase just as Fernandez' bullet discharged and hit the step where he had sat just seconds before. As the old lady screamed Steve turned to see Fernandez pull a knife and charge towards him with pure hatred and madness in his eyes. Steve drew his gun and what happened next almost seemed like slow motion. Steve shouted for Fernandez to freeze but as he kept coming Steve fired with deadly accuracy and Fernandez fell to the ground not far from where Steve and the old lady were pushed into the corner. Steve had kept the lady safely behind him and heard her sobbing hysterically. Fearing that he had hurt her when he had pushed her clear of danger Steve tried to turn to check if she was alright but the stress and strain of the past few minutes had taken their toll and his knees buckled and he fell down to the floor on his knees in a crumpled heap just as Mike appeared in the doorway beside him with his weapon drawn.

"STEVE!"

Mike had heard Steve calling him just as he was giving his location to the ambulance service and felt anxious to return to his injured partner. However next he heard Steve's raised panicked voice followed by a gunshot! Unsure as to what had happened he quickly hung up the phone and drew his weapon racing through the flat all the while praying that Steve was ok. Next he heard the lady's screams, Steve shouting "Freeze!" and a second gunshot and he arrived at the doorway ready to assist in time to see Steve fall to the floor. A quick glance to his left saw Fernandez' prone body on the floor and although his first instinct was to check on Steve he knew through experience that he must check the suspect first to make sure that the situation was made safe.

Mike knelt down and checked Fernandez for a pulse and found none. Then Mike noted that he had a gun and a knife in his hands and feared for Steve even more. Then racing over to where Steve was kneeling on the ground bent over, he gently grabbed his shoulders and asked worriedly.

"Steve! Are you ok? What happened?"

"He was in that flat over there!" Steve said shakily pointing to the doorway across and down the hall. "I saw a blood trail. He came out and shot at us. I managed to get us out of the way but he came at me with a knife. I didn't have a choice Mike!" Steve explained starting to get upset.

"I know you didn't. Don't worry about that now."Mike consoled.

" Did you get hurt again?" he then asked all the while checking him for signs of further injury.

" No ...but Mike. Check the lady. I think I might have hurt her when I pushed her out of danger." he said cross with himself for causing harm to someone who had been so helpful and trusting.

Just then another shooting pain tore up his injured side and feeling the blood drain from his face, his vision blurred again and darkness overtook him as he finally gave in and pitched forward into the waiting arms of his partner and best friend.

The old lady screamed again as Steve passed out and alarmed at Steve's collapse Mike checked his pulse and breathed a sigh of relief to feel it still beating steadily albeit weakly.

"Dios Mio! Is he ...?" the old lady asked still sobbing.

Still holding Steve where he fell Mike looked up reassuringly at the kind old lady and took her hand.

"No. He just passed out. He's lost a lot of blood. Are you ok? Are you hurt?"

The lady shook her head, still staring at Steve with a worried face.

Laying his partner back on the floor he then retrieved the towel and pressed it heavily against the wound. What happened next stunned Mike. The old lady very carefully and with some difficulty knelt down on the floor and removing her cardigan she rolled it up and lifting Steve's head very gently she placed her cardigan under his head. She made the sign of the cross on Steve's head and then reaching into the pocket of her skirt she produced a rosary beads and started saying prayers in spanish all the while watching Steve. Mike was very touched by the scene and swallowed back the lump that appeared in his throat at the kindness and sincerity of this sweet lady. Next Mike heard footsteps on the staircase and prayed it was medical assistance but a young spanish girl appeared instead.

She wasn't more than late teens, early twenties, Mike reckoned and when she saw the scene on the landing she gasped in shock and ran past Mike to the old lady on the floor.

"Abuela! Qué pasó?"

A spanish conversation took place between the two and the young lady hugged the older one tightly. Mike didn't understand what was said but reckoned that the older lady was recounting what had happened to the younger one. All the while he kept a watchful eye on the rise and fall of Steve's chest and on the staircase getting frustrated at the length of time their back up was taking to arrive.

The young lady was the next one to speak.

"This is my grandmother. She told me what happened. She would like to know your partner's name. The young man who saved her life? She is praying for him."

Mike smiled at them both.

"His name is Steve. Steve Keller."

The young lady relayed the name to her grandmother but before they could say any more Steve let out a loud groan under the pressure Mike was exerting on the wound to stop the bleeding. He didn't fully regain consciousness though.

"Take it easy buddy boy. Help's on the way!"

Just as the words left Mike's mouth a commotion could be heard from the lower floors and to Mike's relief within seconds Lee Lessing appeared at the top of the staircase leading a team of detectives and paramedics. Seeing the bloody scene in front of him Lee's heart skipped a beat as he raced over to where Mike was administering to Steve.

"Mike! Sorry we got delayed. There was a car accident along the way. We couldn't get through! How's Steve?"

"He's got a wound on his side. It's been bleeding pretty bad. Get the coroner up here for that guy over there" Mike said pointing at the lifeless body of Fernandez." And get a forensics team up here and seal this area off will you please and I'll need a spanish speaking detective to take this woman's statement too."

"Sure I'm on it Mike." Lee replied and then the paramedics surrounded Steve and assisted Mike in taking care of him.

An IV was set up in Steve's left arm and an oxygen mask was placed over his face. Mike had done a good job of stopping the bleeding and within minutes Steve was on the gurney being taken down the stairs to the waiting ambulance. Before Mike followed he assisted the young woman in helping her grandmother up off the floor and spoke to her.

"Perhaps your grandmother should come with us to the hospital. She's had a nasty shock. We can take her statement from there. You can travel with her if you like?"

The young woman nodded in agreement and again relayed in spanish to her grandmother what Mike had suggested. The old lady accepted without fuss and as the young woman picked up the cardigan from the floor and draped it around her grandmother's shoulders, she closed the door to their flat and all three then followed Steve downstairs.

The drive to the hospital was an anxious one for Mike. As only one person could travel in the ambulance Mike had allowed the old lady's granddaughter to travel with her and had driven behind the ambulance instead. He hoped that Steve hadn't been asking for him and prayed that he would be ok. At the hospital, Steve was quickly taken into the ER while Mike was left to his customary wait in the waiting room. A glance at the clock revealed that it was just after ten o'clock as Mike sat heavily onto a chair. He was soon joined by the lady's granddaughter who chose to sit beside the older detective who had showed such care and respect for her elderly grandmother and together they waited in silence for news of the people they cared about.


	16. Chapter 16

**Act of Remembrance **

Chapter 16

It was just after one thirty am when Steve showed the first signs of coming to a little. The first thing he heard was lots of noise and loud voices. As he opened his eyes the first thing he saw was a blue curtain. His eyelids felt like lead and he struggled to keep them open for more than a few seconds at a time. The second time he opened his eyes he turned his head slightly and staring upwards he saw a white ceiling with glaring florescent lights. Again his eyelids refused to stay open. Next he heard a familiar voice calling him.

"Steve! Buddy boy! That's it. Open those eyes for me now."

The voice appeared to be coming from his right so slowly he turned his head again and forcing his eyes open for a third time he looked straight into the smiling face of Mike Stone. Steve smiled back weakly but closed his eyes again just as quickly as he had opened them.

"Come on now Steve! Keep those eyes open! The Doctors on his way in to check on you."

Steve looked at Mike again drowsily.

"That a boy! How are you feeling?"

But try as he did he couldn't keep them from closing again. Steve's head felt fuzzy and he tried to piece together what had led up to this moment. He remembered the rooftop chase and the face of Javier Fernandez as he ran at him with the knife. He heard Mike talking to him but his mouth wouldn't co-operate with his brain to allow him to answer. When Steve didn't respond to his questions Mike became worried and on seeing the Doctor enter the cubicle he spoke worriedly.

"He's opening his eyes for a few seconds at a time, he smiled at me but he's not answering me!"

Steve felt someone take his pulse and then someone forced opened his eyes one at a time and shone a torch into each one of them.

"He's not fully back with us yet Lieutenant" an unfamiliar voice announced.

"You have to be patient. He lost a fair bit of blood. He'll come back to us when he is ready to. I'd say he'll wake up fairly soon though judging by his vital signs. We'll keep a close eye on him. We've stitched the wound in his side. Now it just needs time to heal. He'll be very sore for a good few days. We will have fully replaced the blood he's lost over the next hour and that should give him back some strength but he's showing distinct signs of exhaustion. I'd recommend that he gets plenty of rest. I'll pop back to see him in another little while."

"Thanks Doctor." Mike said with deep gratitude in his voice. Steve was going to be just fine with a few days off and lots of rest and TLC. However things could have turned out a lot worse and that bothered Mike a great deal. Physically he would heal in time but whatever was bothering him still had to be determined and dealt with. That Mike reckoned from experience, wouldn't be as easy to fix.

Steve heard the conversation that went on around him but just hadn't the energy to even attempt to respond and soon he felt the familiar pull of unconsciousness and in his current weakened condition he allowed the darkness to claim him once more. However this time the darkness didn't bring him the peace it promised!

He was somewhere dark and unfamiliar. His side was hurting really bad and he couldn't make out where he was. He heard Evelyn's voice and followed the sound of it blindly in the dark feeling his way through the pitch darkness. His heart was pounding in his chest and all at once he saw a distant light. He made his way towards it and the nearer he got to the light he realized it was shining from a window. Reaching the window Steve almost recoiled in horror when he looked in and saw Evelyn struggling with Oren Prentiss! His first instinct kicked in and he grabbed for his gun but his holster was empty! He tried to break the glass with his elbow but it refused to break! Evelyn looked at him pleadingly and Steve felt as if his heart would break. Feeling utterly helpless he screamed.

"Get out of there! ... Get out of there! RUN"

Then he felt hands restraining him, pulling him away from the window. He struggled to get away from them and as he did he felt an excruciating pain in his side. Gritting his teeth to ride out the wave of pain he heard himself yelling again.

"NO! Let me go! You don't understand! I have to save her! PLEASE let me go!"

Steve pleaded with his captors but no-one seemed to listen or understand that Evelyn was in danger. Why wouldn't they let him go? But the more he tried to free himself the harder they held him. He started to get upset and felt himself sobbing in despair but then out of nowhere he heard Mike's voice. Unlike the situation he was in, it was comforting and soothing and finally Steve felt safe. Mike would help him. He just had to listen to him and do what he said. Mike would make everything right. He strained to hear what Mike was saying. He was telling him to be calm, to take it easy. He was telling him that everything was ok. He believed him. His breathing slowed, and then he felt someone holding his hand. A strong hand, a safe hand. He opened his eyes slowly and saw Mike speaking softly and soothingly to him.

"You're ok buddy boy! Everything's alright! "

**Mike's POV of Steve's nightmare :**

Steve had slept for another hour after his first attempt at waking. Mike had sat beside his bed and watched him closely but soon tiredness had set in and he felt himself dozing off in the chair. He must have heard Steve groan because he woke with a start and was alarmed to see Steve in the throes of what appeared to be a nightmare of some sort. He was thrashing his head from side to side and was extremely agitated. Mike immediately pressed the bell for the nurse and tried to calm Steve down as best he could. Steve let out a yell that startled Mike. He was pleading with someone to get out of somewhere and telling them to run! But who Mike wondered? Within mere seconds the nurse and doctor had arrived and by now Steve was thrashing his arms about and appeared to be fighting some unseen enemy. As a result of his thrashing the needle came out of his arm and blood leaked from the tube. The Doctor became highly concerned and started barking out orders to an orderly that was passing.

"Help me restrain him! He's going to burst the stitches!"

Both the orderly and the doctor restrained Steve and yet he fought against them persistently. He called out again begging for them to let him go! He had to save someone! Again Mike wondered who? What happened next almost broke Mike's heart. Steve started to sob! A tear escaped from his eye and fell down his face and he sounded utterly desolate. Mike had to DO something but what? The doctor gave up trying to calm him and called for the nurse to bring a sedative. Mike feared that giving him a sedative would merely trap him in his terrible nightmare so he pleaded with the doctor to allow him to try to calm him down instead. Willing to try anything the doctor continued to restrain him while Mike was allowed in closer again. He took Steve's hand in his and leaned in so that Steve could hear him clearly. He told him everything was alright and that he needed to calm down and to everyone in the cubicle's amazement it worked very quickly. Steve stopped struggling and his breathing slowed. The Doctor released Steve and watched in awe as the older detective continued to calm the young man in the bed and then they watched as Steve regained consciousness.

**Back to the present:**

Steve woke from his nightmare very disoriented and uneasy. His breathing had slowed and had calmed down thanks to Mike's presence but the images from his latest nightmare were still fresh in his mind and he was confused about what was happening. His side was throbbing mercilessly and his left arm had seemed to join his side in sympathy as a new stinging pain was manifesting itself at the crease of his elbow. There were still hands prodding and probing at him but with Mike there beside him he didn't seem to mind. He knew that Mike would not let anyone hurt him so he trusted the hands that were attending to him. However due to his fuzzy brain his nightmare and reality had got slightly mixed up so he had to ask Mike the important question.

"Mike! Is she ok? ... Is she?"

Steve was actually talking about Evelyn but Mike wasn't aware of this and asked back.

"Who Steve? Are you talking about Mrs Sanchez?"

"Mrs Sanchez?" Steve repeated even more confused.

"Yes, the lady on the landing. The one you were worried about before you passed out. She's fine Steve. You don't have to worry. You didn't hurt her when you got her out of the way of the bullet. She was a bit shaken but she's fine. Actually she was quite taken with you! She said you were her hero! Eh? What do you think of that huh? "

It took Steve a good few seconds to process what Mike had said and then finally Steve's fog lifted and he remembered everything. Evelyn was dead! It was just a bad dream and he was in the hospital after the incident with Fernandez. Mike watched with concern as Steve stared past him struggling with whatever was going on his head. When he finally got his thoughts together enough to look back at Mike, he saw Mike's worried face. Mike spoke first.

"Did you hear me Steve? She's alright. You don't have to worry."

"That's great! I'm glad. ...What about Fernandez?"

Mike shook his head.

"Don't worry about that either. Mrs Sanchez' statement corroborated your side of the story. You had no choice. If you hadn't fired he would have killed you!"

Steve seemed to sag deeper into the pillows with a blank, hollow look on his face which only changed to a pained look every now and then as the doctors checked his wound and reattached his needles and his blood transfusion line. Mike didn't like his demeanor and decided to probe further.

"Well, buddy boy, that was some nightmare you just had! Was it about this evening and the shooting?"

Steve didn't want to lie to Mike but he didn't want to talk about it either so reluctantly he chose the first option.

"I don't know ... I don't remember ..."

Mike studied Steve closely. While of course it was possible that Steve didn't remember all the details of his bad dream, something about the way he was staring blankly made Mike believe that he remembered it all too well, almost as if the scenes were replaying in Steve's head while he was now awake. Then why won't he talk about it? Damn it Steve! What is so bad that you can't share it with me?Mike thought to himself. After a few minutes Steve seemed to realize that his quietness was worrying Mike and it was as if he pulled a switch in his head and the mask dropped again. Looking at Mike, Steve smiled and spoke.

"What time is it Mike?"

Looking at his watch Mike answered.

"It's just gone three in the morning."

"You look like hell Mike. Why don't you go home and get some sleep? I'm ok now. Really. I'll see you tomorrow."

Mike could see that Steve was anything but fine and yet it seemed that Steve was anxious for him to go. Normally Mike could always manage to get to the bottom of whatever was bothering Steve even though most of the time it took a lot of time and effort but this time Mike was at a loss as to what was going on with his young partner and that bothered him greatly. However if Steve wanted him to go home then maybe it was something that he genuinely needed to work out by himself and Mike knew he had to respect that so reluctantly Mike went along with his wishes.

"Ok buddy boy. If you're sure you're ok? I guess I am a bit tired."

"Stop worrying Mike. I'm fine really. Just tired and sore that's all. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ok. You do whatever the Doc tells you now you hear? Try to get some rest. Promise me now?"

Steve smiled affectionately at Mike. Then he nodded his head and replied.

"Ok. I promise. I'll see you."

Mike smiled back and winked at Steve then looked anxiously at the Doctor.

"Don't worry Lieutenant. He's in good hands. He hasn't done any further damage to the wound. We'll make sure he rests."

And with the reassurance of the doctor Mike turned and left. It felt strange leaving Steve there knowing that there was something still not right with him but he had to admit that his old bones needed some well overdue rest so he drove home downhearted vowing that after a good few hours sleep he would get Steve to open up to him tomorrow.

The doctor watched the Lieutenant leave and studied the young man in the bed. He had been amazed at how Mike had calmed Steve down so quickly and realized that there must be a very strong bond between the two men but something about the far away look in his patient's eyes bothered him. After Steve was cleaned up and made more comfortable in the bed the doctor decided to speak to him candidly.

"You did remember the nightmare didn't you?"

Steve looked up at the doctor and blushed slightly worrying now that if the doctor who Steve had never met before saw through his lie then it was safe to assume that Mike had too.

"Yeah ... Is there anything you can give me to help me sleep without the nightmare coming back?" Steve asked feeling exhausted but fearful of closing his eyes.

"Sure I can give you something but it would be fairly strong. How long have you been having nightmares like that?"

Steve again wondered how he seemed to find it so easy to speak to total strangers about Evelyn and yet he couldn't talk about it with the man he cared for like a father.

"Just a couple of nights. It's the anniversary tomorrow of someone I lost. Someone I cared about. She was murdered. There's a memorial service later this afternoon at three. Will I be able to go to it Doc? "

"Steve! You only came in here yesterday evening . You've got a hole in your side and we still haven't even fully replaced the blood you lost. To top it all you're exhausted. Today is too soon to release you. You need to stay a couple of days so we can get you back on your feet."

"Please Doc. It's really important to me! You said yourself there's no bullet in me and the wound just needs to heal right?. And I can rest at home. It's only a memorial service so I won't be doing anything strenuous. Come on Doc. I have to be there! Please!"

The doctor could see how badly Steve wanted to attend the service but worried about allowing him home so soon. Torn in his decision he weighed up his options.

"Ok, I'll tell you what. If you get some decent sleep for the rest of tonight and if your bloods, your wound and your vital signs are all ok in the morning I'll consider releasing you around noon ok? But I'm taking a big risk letting you go so soon so you have to promise not to overdo it and to get lots of rest. Alright?"

Steve felt relieved that the Doctor was willing to consider letting him attend the service and although there were a lot of "ifs" involved Steve felt sure that he would get to go. Grateful to the doctor for his understanding he nodded his head.

"Sure! I promise."

"Ok, how long do you want me to put you out for?"

"Just until about nine or ten please." Steve answered feeling utterly spent and exhausted and longing for some uninterrupted sleep.

So as the doctor prepared the sedative and injected it into Steve's arm, gradually the room faded and blackness closed in only this time it brought welcome rest and Steve slept peacefully.


	17. Chapter 17

**Act Of Remembrance**

Chapter 17

The next time Steve woke the doctor was standing beside his bed and he came to much quicker and while his head felt a bit muzzy he definitely felt more rested. This time it only took mere seconds to remember where he was and why and instantly realized that he was no longer in an ER cubicle but in a hospital room. As he allowed Steve to fully get his bearings the doctor spoke first.

"Well good morning! The sedative certainly seemed to do the trick. The nurse tells me you slept peacefully all night and your vitals are quite strong this morning. How are you feeling?"

" I feel ok. Just my side is very sore. That's all."

"Well it will be for a while yet. The bullet did some tissue damage which has to heal and the stitches will be tender for a few days too until they start to knit together. When you start moving around, walking and bending try to hold your injured side and it will stop the stitches from pulling and make life easier. I'm just waiting on your blood results. They should be back any minute so if they're ok I'll arrange for you to go home around twelve HOWEVER I need you to try to eat some breakfast first! Your blood pressure is still a little on the low side and I don't want you keeling over on me at this service later. So I need you to eat something then we'll see how you are walking around a bit before I sign your papers. Ok? Do you think you could manage to eat something?"

"Yeah, I think so. Thanks Doc."

"Don't thank me yet! Let's take a look at that wound."

The next few minutes went by as the doctor checked Steve's wound. Steve flinched slightly as the doctor probed the tender skin and bit back a groan as he prodded at the stitches. Then satisfied that it was clean and holding together nicely the doctor left to check for his blood results leaving the nurse to redress the wound. Then after deciding that he would try some porridge and juice for breakfast he asked if he could make two phone calls and was helped to sit up and given the phone. Glancing at the clock on the wall it was just coming up to ten o'clock.

First he rang his neighbour Anderson and asked if he would be able to bring him some clean clothes from his apartment and pick him up from the hospital around noon if he was given the all clear and bring him home. Andy was horrified to hear that Steve had been injured and Steve had to convince the young man that it was only a flesh wound! Steve had often given the young man a lift in the past and thankfully he was more than willing to help. Thanking him he then hung up and considered his next phone call carefully.

He knew Mike wouldn't agree with him leaving the hospital so soon and figured that he would insist on picking him up as he always did but attending Evelyn's memorial service was something he felt he had to do alone so steeling himself for a difficult conversation he carefully dialled Mike's home number and waited for a few seconds while it rang. After a good few rings a sleepy voice answered the phone.

"Hi Mike. It's Steve. No I'm fine. Everything's ok. I'm sorry for waking you but I just wanted to let you know that they're talking about letting me home around noon today."

Steve had to hold the receiver away from his ear for a few seconds as Mike boomed his disapproval down the line! After a minute rant about the dangers of letting someone out of hospital too soon Steve got back on the line and tried to appease the older man.

"Mike, will you calm down? I'M OK! No, you don't need to pick me up. Andy's gonna bring me in some clean clothes and give me a ride home. Well, I know you were going into the office today to clean up that desk of yours and Andy's free this morning so it makes more sense. Listen there's something I have to do this afternoon remember but I'll probably still call by later to your place like I said I would, ok? I don't know if I'll be much help gardening at the minute but I'll call by later anyway. Mike! I promise I'll take it easy. Yes! Stop worrying will you? Ok. I'll see you later. Bye."

Steve hung up and lay back against the pillows. He hated keeping stuff from Mike but he HAD to do this himself. That was how he always dealt with things and this time would be no different.

The nurse returned and replaced the phone on the bedside locker and over the next hour and a half Steve managed to eat most of his breakfast, get the all clear on his bloods, walk up and down the corridor outside his room four times slowly and carefully to satisfy the doctor as to his fitness and then as Andy arrived he had gotten dressed and sat talking to Andy as he waited for his release papers to be signed. As the two men chatted and passed the time of day a young hispanic girl came to the door of his room and stood hesitantly staring in at them.

"Can I help you?" Steve asked.

"Are you Steve Keller?"

"Yes. Come in" Steve replied quite sure that he had never seen the young lady before."I'm sorry. Have we met? "

The young lady nervously smiled.

"No, not exactly. I am Maria Sanchez. My grandmother was the lady who was with you in our building yesterday evening. When I got there you were already unconscious." the young woman explained.

"Oh, ok. Is your grandmother ok? I was afraid I had hurt her getting her out of the way of that bullet."

"Yes, she is fine. My grandmother is a strong woman. She said it would take more than that to finish her off. She was worried about you though. She asked me to come here and give you this gift for saving her life."

"Oh, no! I can't take a gift. Really. I'm the reason she was in danger in the first place." Steve flustered.

"Please you must take it. It is just something small. She wants you to have it. It would mean a lot to her if you accept it."

Steve took the small box from the young lady's hands, carefully untied the ribbon and opened it up. Inside the box was a small metal charm of a man's head. Steve picked up the small charm and looked at it closely while the young lady explained its significance.

"It is a Milagros. Where we come from in Mexico it is considered a good luck charm. You carry it with you at all times to ward off evil and for protection and good luck. The head represents the mind and spirit. My grandmother says it will help you to become strong again and to recover from your injury."

Steve looked closely at the small charm in his hands and was very touched by the lady's thoughtful gift.

"Please thank your grandmother for me and tell her I will keep it with me always. It was very thoughtful of her. In my line of work I need all the good luck and protection I can get. Thank you."

"You are welcome! Oh, I almost forgot. My grandmother asked if you would give this gift to your partner too. It is a rosary ring. She said that she sensed that your partner was a man of God and that he would appreciate it."

Taking the second box, again he thanked the young lady and having said their goodbyes she left. The doctor returned just before twelve with Steve's discharge papers but insisted on checking him over one last time before he let him leave. After issuing Steve with a ream of instructions about taking it easy and not overdoing things, how to take care of his wound and giving him a prescription for strong painkillers, Andy was allowed to take him home but as per hospital protocol and much to Steve's dismay he had to travel to the front door in a wheelchair.

Before they left the hospital Steve called in on Mrs Peterson to see how she was getting on. She was in good spirits and feeling much better and was delighted to inform Steve that she was being allowed home the next day. She was very concerned to see that he had been injured and it took a lot of convincing to assure her that he was ok. She told him that she and her granddaughter had settled their differences and then Andy filled her in as to how Teddy was doing. As Andy and Mrs Peterson discussed her cat Steve squirmed a little in the wheelchair as his side started to hurt. Sensing Steve's discomfort Andy suggested that they had better go and saying their goodbyes to Mrs Peterson, Andy wheeled Steve to the main doors and then walked him slowly to his car for the journey home.

On the way home, Andy helped Steve pick up his prescription, a few groceries and much to Andy's confusion Steve stopped at the florist and picked up a dozen yellow roses. Then they headed for Union Street. By the time they made it up to Steve's apartment Steve's side was hurting like hell and he could no longer hide the fact from his neighbour. Andy made him lie down on the couch and fetched him a glass of water with which to take his painkillers. With his pills taken Steve had no choice but to lie there and wait for the meds to kick in and take the edge off the agonizing pain that was throbbing mercilessly through his side. Andy insisted on putting away the few groceries for Steve and put the roses in some water. When Andy returned from the kitchen he saw that Steve had fallen asleep. The strong pain meds and the stress and the strains of the last few days had taken their toll on the young detective. Fetching a blanket from the bedroom Andy covered Steve and having made sure that Steve was comfortable he wrote him a note telling him that he just had to call him if he needed anything else. Then closing the front door gently so as not to disturb his sleeping friend he headed back up to his own apartment.

**Meanwhile at De Haro street:**

Mike had been in a deep sleep since he had practically fallen into his bed at three thirty am. It had been one hell of a day and Mike had to admit that he was feeling the worst for wear. He slept like a log until his phone started ringing just around ten am. Answering with his normal "Stone!" Mike was initially alarmed to hear Steve's voice. Steve had been quick to assure him that he was fine but when he heard that they were releasing him so soon he had lost his cool and unintentionally lectured Steve on the dangers of leaving hospital before he was ready. When Steve had told him to calm down he had realized that he probably wasn't the best person to lecture Steve on leaving hospital too soon as he had been guilty in the past of discharging himself on more than one occasion against doctor's orders. However it still worried him. He didn't think that it would have been the doctor's idea to discharge him so soon, so he concluded that Steve had requested an early release to facilitate whatever his plans had been for this afternoon. Mike had given up on trying to convince him to stay in the hospital so instead he had offered to pick him up thus being able to keep a close eye on him. But Steve had other arrangements already in place. By the time their conversation was over and Steve had hung up, Mike had a very uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. What in God's name were his mystery plans? And why all the mystery? And why was he intent on making sure that Mike was not involved ? He reckoned it was probably the detective in him but the more that Steve distanced himself from him the more he wanted to find out why. But going against his gut instinct he decided that if Steve wanted him to carry on as normal and leave him alone then that is what he would do. Perhaps if he respected Steve's wishes then Steve would open up to him later at his house. At least that is what he was hoping.

Mike got up at around eleven, showered, shaved and dressed and after a quick breakfast headed down to Bryant Street for around twelve. The office was quiet enough for a Saturday morning and pouring himself a cup of coffee he headed into his office to begin the arduous task of clearing his mountain of paperwork. He hadn't even stopped in the bullpen to pass the time of day with Lee and Bill which was very unusual for the older detective and both men exchanged a worried glance at the downhearted demeanour of their boss and colleague as he had merely greeted them glumly and headed for the coffee machine and then into his office closing the door behind him.

Lee decided to investigate further despite Bill's protests and knocking quietly on Mike's door and hearing a very deflated "Come in!" Lee entered the office and headed over to Mike's desk.

"Is everything ok Mike? You seem a little off form. I mean Steve is ok isn't he?"

"I wish I knew Lee ... I really do!" was Mike's strange reply.

Seeing Lee's puzzled and now very concerned face Mike quickly elaborated.

"Yes, physically he'll be ok. Just a flesh wound. He'll be sore for a while and he needs time to rest and heal but that's not what I'm worried about Lee."

"He's still acting strange huh? Have you asked him what's going on?"

"No ...Not particularly. I asked him what was bothering him but he brushed it off as tiredness. I was hoping that he would talk to me himself about it. You know. Voluntarily. He's got these mystery plans for this afternoon. He said it wasn't a date and that it wouldn't take long and for some strange reason he doesn't want me to know about it. But it's directly connected with whatever's going on with him."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I just know. Call it intuition. Call it gut instinct. But I'm sure of it Lee. If I knew where he was going this afternoon, I'd know what was bugging him! But how in God's name am I going to find out that. Huh?"

Little did Mike know that the answer lay right at his feet!


	18. Chapter 18

**Act Of Remembrance**

Chapter 18

Mike had worked on his paperwork pile for around an hour and a half and was making good progress. Concentrating on clearing his desk had at least taken his mind off Steve temporarily although every report that he came across typed up and signed by Steve had tempted him to pick up his phone and call him to see if he was ok but every time he had fought back the urge and returned to his task. By two o'clock, Mike's desk was finally tidied and Mike sat back quite proud of himself for having it finally organized again. As he sat admiring his work Rudy Olsen had knocked on Mike's door and asked to be updated on the Fernandez case which Mike dutifully did. The Captain inquired about how Steve was and they had talked about Jeannie and the Captain's daughter too.

By the time Rudy left it was just after three fifteen and Mike was considering calling it a day and heading home. Picking up his keys, they slipped out of his hand and fell on the floor. Cursing his clumsiness Mike bent down to pick them up and something under his chair caught his eye. Reaching in he retrieved what appeared to be a notelet and as he stood up and read it Mike's heart sank. It was a phone message written in Bill's handwriting dated last Tuesday from Sherry Reese telling Mike about a memorial service for Evelyn Hennick's first anniversary! It was to take place on Saturday at three o'clock ! Mike sank back into his chair, the notelet still grasped in his hand.

THAT'S IT! Suddenly it all made sense. Sherry must have contacted Steve too! Tuesday was when Steve's mood had changed and when he had become very quiet and withdrawn. Then he had mentioned that he hadn't been sleeping well. Then he remembered Steve's reaction to the morgue table just yesterday! Dear God! The memory of a year ago flooded back to Mike and he remembered how devastated Steve had been as he saw Evelyn laid out in the Morgue! He had stood behind Steve with a hand on his shoulder as a show of support and had felt the young man shaking. He had steered Steve outside for a spot of fresh air but just like now throughout the whole ordeal Steve had refused to talk about his upset. He had bottled it all up and dealt with it by himself. Throughout the funeral, and even after he had taken out the murderer at Sherry's apartment he had still remained very withdrawn and depressed. As the weeks had gone by he had very gradually come back to himself however on more than one occasion when Evelyn's name had come up in conversation Steve still seemed to become distant and distracted. He should have realized! Some detective he was!

And that also explained why he hadn't talked to Mike about what was bothering him. He had found it difficult to talk to Mike when it happened a year ago and when Mike hadn't mentioned the memorial service Steve must have assumed that he wasn't going or that he didn't care! He had even asked Mike what his plans were for Saturday and Mike had unwittingly said that he had no plans!

He was annoyed with himself that he hadn't remembered Evelyn's anniversary but also that he had let his desk become so cluttered. If he had kept on top of his paperwork he would have received the phone message on the day it had come through and the cause of Steve's angst would have been clear. He vowed never to let his desk get into such a disorganized mess again. Looking up at his wall clock he saw that it was just gone three twenty-five. The service was already on but if he hurried he could still get there and be there for Steve. He would make it up to the boy! He wasn't going to let him deal with it alone any longer. Mike was going to be there for him whether he wanted him to be or not! Grabbing his coat and fedora he picked up his keys and headed out of his office. As he passed Steve's desk he hesitated momentarily and pulling out the top drawer of Steve's desk he picked up two packets of sunflower seeds that were on the top and there underneath was a photo of Steve and Evelyn in happier times. They were both smiling and when Mike remembered the sadness with which he had seen Steve studying the picture a couple of days ago a lump appeared in his throat. Placing the seeds back over it he closed the drawer and hurried out of the bullpen determined to get to the Service in record time.

**Meanwhile at Union Street around 2pm :**

A car sped out of a side street causing a truck travelling down Union Street to blare its horn loudly. The blaring sound woke Steve from his slumber and he sat bolt upright alarmed by the loud noise. He instantly regretted his sudden action as his tender side throbbed and made its presence known. Wincing and holding his side he took a couple of deep breaths and then realizing that he was back in the comfort of his own apartment he very carefully threw the blanket to one side, swung his legs off the couch and sat up, rubbing a hand through his hair. Seeing a note on the coffee table he picked it up, read it and smiled at Andy's thoughtfulness. Then wondering how long he had slept for he glanced at his watch casually. Five past two!

"Oh hell!" Steve exclaimed realizing that if he didn't get a move on he was going to be late for the Service.

Picking up his phone he rang a taxi company and requested a taxi to pick him up at two thirty-five. Then making his way steadily but carefully to his bathroom he quickly shaved and dressed in his best suit. Dressing himself again just like back at the hospital hadn't been an easy task. The stretching and bending took its toll and by the time he was finished he had broken out in a cold sweat. Adjusting his tie in the bathroom mirror he didn't tie the knot as tight as normal and left the knot lower too as he felt it almost constricting his airflow. Suddenly a wave of dizziness washed over him and he swayed where he stood feeling unbalanced. The familiar blackness threatened to close in on him so he sat down on the closed toilet seat and lowered his head as far as he was able with his aching side. Breathing deeply, thankfully Steve felt his faintness pass and he waited a few fearful moments before he went back into the hall and down into the little kitchen.

At the sink he poured himself a cold glass of water and downed it in one go. Then he retrieved the flowers that Andy had put in water for him. They were bright yellow roses. Evelyn's favourite! She had always had a special affection for them and he remembered all the times he had bought them for her. Most of the time for happy occasions except for the wreath he had made of them last year for her funeral. Her funeral! It was so surreal to use those words when he thought of her. She had always been so full of life, so carefree, so happy and easygoing. Factors that had always endeared her to Steve. But that had all been robbed from her in a few moments of a deranged man's madness. His heart felt strange as it filled with a mixture of sadness, rage and regret. Moisture once more filled his eyes and hearing the taxi's horn outside he quickly wrapped the flowers and put on his dark sunglasses, threw his painkillers into his pocket just in case he would need them later and locking up his apartment he made his way down to the waiting taxi and gave instructions to the driver as to his destination. And with that the taxicab drove off in the afternoon sunshine.

Steve remained silent for the trip to the church and truth be told was only half-listening instead to the vague ramblings of the driver. He politely nodded every now and then but he felt too emotionally drained to engage in small talk. While he wanted to be there for Evelyn, for the first time in the last five days he started to doubt whether he was up to it or not. They arrived at the church at two fifty pm in plenty of time and Steve got out gingerly, paid the driver and made his way slowly up the few steps. He had just entered through the main church doors when Sherry came rushing up to him with concern written all over her face.

"Steve! I heard you'd been shot! I wasn't expecting you to come! Are you alright?"

"I'm ok Sherry. Obviously the story about my injury has been greatly exaggerated! It was just a flesh wound. I'm just sore that's all."

"Well, you look very pale! You'd better go take a seat. Here's a booklet. I'm glad you could make it though ... for Evelyn." and she took his hand and squeezed it and they exchanged a look of mutual grief at the loss of someone who had meant so much to both of them.

"Yeah ...me too. I'll see you after" and squeezing her hand back he took Sherry's advice and made his way up the church however while he had hoped to make a quiet entrance and sit inconspicuously off at the side his plans backfired as Evelyn's mother saw him and came walking straight for him.

"Steve! Oh Steve, we're so glad you could come. It would have meant a lot to Evelyn." and then unexpectedly she pulled him into a tight hug.

Steve winced as she squeezed his injured side but bit back the yell that under different circumstance would have automatically escaped his lips. Then releasing him she looked at him closely and started ranting .

"Why Steve! Have you lost weight? You know you really can't afford to and you look so pale. How have you been coping? It's been such a terrible year. We all miss her so much. You were very special to her Steve. She talked about you all the time. You know Henry and I can never thank you enough for getting her killer. You really mustn't be a stranger. You're always welcome at the house. Anytime."

Luckily for Steve, just at that moment someone else came and distracted Mrs Hennick's attention and sympathized with her and Steve used the golden opportunity to take his leave and took a seat right beside the side door of the church. His side was hurting after the bear hug he had just received and he was feeling slightly light-headed again so he reckoned that if he needed air he could slip out fairly unnoticed from his chosen seat.

Soon the church had filled up and the service began. They had a large photograph of Evelyn on the altar with an equally large circular wreath around it. Seeing her smiling face on the altar brought another lump to Steve's throat. He listened as the priest said prayers and her brother and father both got up and spoke about Evelyn. Steve became emotional as he listened to the lovely stories they relayed about her and at some point he drifted off in his own mind to his own memories of their precious time together. He remembered her smile and her laugh. She had an infectious laugh and they had laughed a lot. He remembered their conversations. He was comfortable in her company and felt that he could talk to her about anything. She never judged or was forceful in her opinions. She was a good listener and they seemed to have a lot of interests in common. He had grown to care a great deal about her and had at one stage felt that perhaps she might be the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. But it had all ended badly. He had never got to tell her how he truly felt. As a matter of fact he hadn't told anybody how much he had cared for her. Everyone had assumed it was just another passing fancy of his but his relationship with Evelyn was so much more. And so he had coped with the loss on his own after the funeral, not feeling able to talk to anyone, not even Mike, about the fact that her death had broken his heart in two.

The sound of his name being mentioned brought Steve back to reality and to his horror he saw the whole congregation's eyes directed towards him. Evelyn's father was thanking him for getting justice for his daughter and praising his skills as a police officer. The family would be forever grateful to him for stopping the monster that killed their beloved Evelyn and for stopping any other family going through the heartache they had endured. They went on to say that Evelyn would have been proud of him. Steve forced a smile, nodded his thanks and wished in that instant that the ground would open up and swallow him. God he hated fuss! And anyway what would Evelyn be proud of him for? He hadn't saved her! He hadn't been there for her! She had died an awful death and he had done nothing to prevent it.

Steve felt himself get upset. The lump that was now permanently lodged in his throat was getting harder to swallow down. His mask was slipping and he was grateful when the priest resumed the concluding prayers and all eyes returned to the altar. However then they played the last song. As Steve listened to the words his bottom lip began to quiver, his eyes started to water and his hands started to shake. Steve knew that he had to get out of there and fast as he couldn't control his emotions any longer. Just then as if out of mercy the congregation stood and undercover of the large crowd of people Steve picked up the roses and slipped out the side door unnoticed.

He made his way down around the back of the church and headed towards the graveyard a little way off. As he walked, his tears fell freely and his body shook with sobs of despair. His emotions finally won out and found release, as Steve could no longer hold them in, beaten down by pain and exhaustion. Grateful for the solitude and the chance to release at least some his heartache Steve let the tears fall as he walked along with the picture of Evelyn in his mind.


	19. Chapter 19

**Act Of Remembrance**

Chapter 19

Meanwhile Mike had taken every shortcut he knew in order to get to the church as fast as he could and arrived outside at exactly three forty-five. Parking the car quickly he took the steps two at a time and entered the church doors slightly out of breath and anxious to find Steve. The service seemed to be just over, as the people were standing and the last hymn was being sung. Looking around, he quickly scanned the church to see if he could find his partner but the church was quite full and with people standing it was very difficult. Still standing at the back of the church, he was distracted from his task as a voice softly addressed him from his right side. Looking in the direction of the voice he spotted Officer Sherry Reese beckoning him over to where she was sitting. Dutifully he joined her and as he sat down beside her she whispered.

"Mike! You're late! It's just over! Didn't you get my message to say that it started at three?"

Whispering back Mike replied.

"Well, it's kind of a long story but I only just got your message at three twenty-five today. However it was entirely my fault. I mislaid the message that someone had taken down for me but I appreciate you letting me know. Listen Sherry have you seen Steve?"

"Sure, he got here just before three. He's sitting over there at the ... side. Well that's funny. He was over there throughout the service. I wonder where he went?"

Worry again tore at Mike's heart about Steve's whereabouts.

"How did he seem to you Sherry?"

"He was alright I think ... although he did look pale and of course he seemed a little upset about the service. But Mike, he said it was just a flesh wound that he got. Was he telling the truth?"

"Yes, it was just a flesh wound alright but they only let him out of the hospital today at around twelve."

"Oh my God! No wonder he looked so pale! If I had known that Mike I would have kept a closer eye on him. Honest I would." Sherry said worriedly.

"Now, now. I know you would have. But it's not that, I'm worried about. This service has dragged up Evelyn's death for Steve and he's really cut up about it. He's been off form for days and I never guessed why until I got your message. He's hardly ever spoken about it Sherry and knowing Steve like I do I'm sure he blames himself for what happened to her. I have to find him."

"Mike! What happened to Evelyn wasn't his fault! None of us saw that coming!"

"You know that Sherry and I know that but Steve ... well Steve thinks different to us"

"Oh Mike! What are we going to do?"

Mike thought for a minute and then realized where he would find Steve.

"I think I know where he is! Listen Sherry, I need you to stay here and keep an eye out for him just in case I miss him. If you see him, keep him here until I get back. I don't care how you manage it ok? Handcuff him to you if you have to! " Mike stated animatedly.

"Sure Mike. Ok. Go find him."

"Thanks Sherry."

And with that, Mike left the church and headed for the graveyard. If he were Steve, that's where he would go.

**Meanwhile...**

By the time that Steve had reached the small gate that led into the graveyard he had managed to pull himself back together. Wiping the tears from his face with his hand and taking deep calming breaths he hesitated for a moment at the gate and then steeled himself for seeing her gravestone. Willing himself to be strong, he finally lifted the latch and made his way to Evelyn's resting place. The grave had been well cared for and there were some new wreaths on the grass in front of the headstone. Again a small picture of Evelyn adorned the top left of the headstone and holding his side carefully Steve hunched down at the graveside and trying to keep his emotions in check he placed a hand on the picture and shakily started to speak.

"Evelyn ... I bet you're surprised to see me. I'm sorry that I haven't come here since the funeral. I wanted to. I even came twice ... at Christmas and your birthday but I ... I couldn't make it past the gate. I'm not sure why. I just couldn't. So I ... lit candles in the church for you instead."

Steve's voice started to break as tears started to fall again and he was so upset and so focussed on his conversation that he hadn't noticed the older man's arrival a little way off or the fact that he hung back and stood watching him carefully and respectfully from a short distance.

"Evelyn honey ... I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you. When I think what you went through ... and what he did to you ..."

Steve stopped talking as heart wrenching sobs tore through him and he held his side a little tighter as his whole body shook from his misery. After a few more seconds he wiped away again the fresh tears on his face, took another few shaky deep breaths and continued speaking.

"There's so much I never got to tell you Evelyn ... I ... I loved you. And I'm so sorry I never got the chance to tell you that. I thought by getting Prentiss that I'd feel better you know. But I didn't. Because it didn't bring you back. I miss you. I miss your laugh. I miss your smile. I miss seeing you ..."

Steve had to stop again for a few more seconds as the upset threatened to choke him. Again fighting to control his wavering voice he spoke again.

"I brought you some yellow roses! Your favourite ... Evelyn, I don't expect you to forgive me but I am so sorry for letting you down. God I am so, so sorry ..."

That was all he could say as he lost control of his emotions one last time and he let his tears fall as he still held her picture with one hand and letting go of his side he started placing the roses in the holders beside the headstone with the other.

Mike saw Steve upset and it tore at his heart. He heard most of what Steve had said and it touched him deeply. He was torn between wanting to rush over and console the young man and wanting to allow him space to grieve and to finally release all the upset that he had bottled up over a whole year. Deciding he had better follow his gut instinct which was to let the young man cry it out, he had held back, all the while watching carefully for signs that Steve needed him and as Steve broke down for the last time and started placing the flowers Mike felt it was the right time to step in.

He decided to give Steve fair warning as he knew Steve well enough to know that he would hate for Mike to see him in an upset state so coming towards the grave he called out.

"There you are buddy boy! I've been looking for you."

Just as Mike had figured Steve was horrified to see Mike approaching and quickly rubbed at his face desperately trying to remove all signs of his tears and yet knowing his efforts were futile and that Mike would see his reddened eyes and see through any pretence easily. So deciding on a plan B Steve settled for not looking directly at his partner but continued to place the roses instead and clearing his throat he spoke to the older man.

"Mike! I didn't think you were coming to the service. What changed your mind?"

"I didn't know it was on Steve ..."

Steve hadn't expected that answer and looked up at Mike questioningly but then quickly remembering his red eyes turned away again quickly.

"What are you talking about? Sherry rang you didn't she?"

"Yes, she rang alright but I wasn't in the office. Bill took a phone message and placed it on my desk. It got buried. I just found it a half an hour ago. I'm sorry Steve! I guess you thought it hadn't mattered to me when I hadn't mentioned it huh? I wish you'd talked to me about Evelyn. Told me how upset you were. I would have understood you know."

By now Mike had arrived behind Steve and Steve felt his presence behind him. As Steve realized that Mike hadn't received Sherry's message and how he'd assumed that Mike hadn't cared he felt foolish and hearing Mike's heartfelt words Steve wasn't sure he could speak again without his voice betraying the heartache he felt. But he decided he owed Mike an apology too for his strange behaviour of late so he tried to explain.

"I'm sorry too Mike ... I should have said something. I wanted to ... I just couldn't find the words ..."

Steve's voice broke again and he dropped the rest of the roses and covered his face with his hand to hide his grief. Stepping forward Mike placed both of his hands on Steve's shoulders and spoke compassionately.

"I know, I know. It's ok buddy boy"

Feeling Steve's shoulders shake as more sobs of despair overtook him again, Mike squeezed his shoulders as a show of support and continued.

"It's alright now. You need to let it out. You've held onto it for far too long. Let it go now Steve. You'll feel better when you do. Believe me I know. You know I was a little mad at you for not telling me what was wrong until I found that message. Then I understood. You see after Helen died I couldn't talk about it either. I didn't discuss it with anyone for oh maybe a year and a half. Except for Jeannie of course. So you see I couldn't be mad at you then because I did exactly the same."

Steve tried his best to stop sobbing but he was finding it difficult to, but after hearing Mike's words about Helen he felt sorry for the older man and casting a quick glance over his shoulder at Mike, it gave him the strength he needed to shakily speak again.

"I'm sorry Mike ... I didn't know that." was all he could think to say.

"I know you didn't Steve. How could you? ... Steve? I didn't know you cared that way for Evelyn. You never mentioned that it was that serious."

Steve realized then that Mike must have heard most of his conversation to Evelyn and embarrassment added to his misery.

" How much did you hear ?" Steve asked almost afraid of Mike's answer.

"Enough" was Mike's vague response and again he squeezed Steve's shoulders sympathetically.

"Oh man!" Steve said feeling mortified that Mike had seen and heard his breakdown and covered his face with his hand again.

"Hey, hey now! Don't be like that. Whatever I heard stays between you and me. Ok?" and hunching down beside him he put a hand on Steve's chin and turned his face towards him. "Look at me now. You don't have to be embarrassed with me for getting upset. We've been together too long for that. We're partners, you and me. What affects you affects me. Ok? Steve! You don't have to deal with everything all by yourself. Please buddy boy. Talk to me. Maybe it would help, huh? What do you say?

Steve had listened to what Mike had said and his words had touched him deeply. And he was right too. As partners Mike had a right to know what was going on with him especially if it affected their work partnership. Not talking to Mike about his angst had almost cost him his life yesterday. What if the next time it was Mike's life that was endangered because he was struggling with something and refusing to talk about it. So he cleared his throat, rubbed at his eyes and looking directly at Mike this time, he spoke.

"Ok, you're right! I should have told you how bad Evelyn's death affected me. I really think she might have been the one Mike. Everyone thought she was just another notch on my bedpost."

"Steve, I'm sure nobody thought that!"

"It's ok Mike. I know that's what they were saying! But it wasn't like that Mike. Evelyn was different. She was special. You know I've lost people in my life before, my parents, my grandfather, even some friends and it hurts you know. But since Evelyn died its felt like I've been walking around with a knife permanently stuck in my heart. You know what I mean?"

Mike listened eagerly glad that Steve was finally opening up to him. He never realized it had been that serious between Steve and Evelyn.

"Yes I know exactly what you mean Steve."

"Did ... Did you feel like that when Helen ... Well you know when she died?" Steve asked tentatively

"Oh yes. That's what we call heartbreak buddy boy. It gets easier with time Steve. You never forget but you learn to live with the pain of missing them."

"Mike. I should have brought her home that night. I should have made sure she was safe. I ... I let her down Mike ..." Steve said as another tear trailed down his cheek.

Grabbing the back of Steve's neck gently, Mike spoke forcefully.

"Now you listen to me buddy boy! You were NOT responsible for Evelyn's death! You seem to be forgetting something very important. You wanted to go home with her that night. Don't you remember? In the supermarket car park you said that you were looking forward to her cooking you a home cooked meal from all the goodies she bought. It was me who made you come down to the station to type up the report! If you want to blame someone. BLAME ME! If I had let you take her home she might have been ok OR I might have lost you too! We can't second guess every decision we make in this job. If we did why we'd end up crazy! Steve, Evelyn wouldn't want you to be feeling upset and guilty for the rest of your life. She wouldn't want to see you like this. She cared about you too Steve! She'd want you to move on with your life. You'll never forget her but you have to move on. I know you don't believe in God the way I do and that's ok but I do believe that our loved ones that are gone have a way of showing us that ... well that they're ok with us meeting someone else."

Mike finished furtively and studied Steve's reaction to what he had said. Steve had listened carefully but seemed to have trouble with his last statement.

"Mike! Come on! How can you possibly know that? Now you're just saying things to try to make me feel better."

"No ... no I'm not. Look I'm going to tell you something that I have never told anyone else. Not even Jeannie. But I think you need to hear it."

Steve was intrigued. Turning more to face Mike he stopped worrying about his reddened eyes and looked Mike straight in the eye.

"Go on."

"Well, Helen hated broccoli. I mean she hated it with a passion! Her mother used to cook it all the time for her when she was a kid. She told her it would put colour in her cheeks and she used to always say "who wants green cheeks?"

Mike laughed as he said that line and Steve smiled at it too in spite of himself. He noticed Mike's face light up as he often did when he talked about Helen and figured they must have really loved each other. Mike seemed lost thinking about Helen for a few seconds but then he continued his story.

"Well, it became a private joke between us. When she'd ask me to go to the store to pick up some groceries I'd ask her if she wanted broccoli. Things like that? Just joking you know. After she died ... well I felt like you do now. It took me a long time to feel ok again and eventually it became lonely. When Jeannie went off to college and I was in that empty house by myself well it was hard buddy boy."

Steve felt sorry for his partner and placed a hand on his arm to show that he understood.

"Then about three years later I was in the canteen one day ..."

Mike saw Steve eyeing him suspiciously when he made that statement and chuckled.

"I know you'll find it hard to believe but I did actually use the canteen once upon a time. Anyway this particular day I was in the queue and I heard some woman behind me complaining about broccoli. Apparently she hated the stuff! Couldn't stand it! And it was almost as if I heard Helen's voice telling me to talk to her. So I did."

At this stage Steve was looking sceptically at Mike.

"Come on Mike. You made that up didn't you? "

Mike's face remained serious. "No Steve. That's how I met Irene. You can ask her if you don't believe me."

"You're serious aren't you? But Mike, that could have been a coincidence. How can you be sure that was Helen giving you her blessing?"

"I just knew buddy boy. I can't really explain it. I just knew. Wait and see. Evelyn will give you a sign too. Mark my words! And I'll tell you something else too!"

"What?"

"Men my age were not supposed to sit hunched down like this for very long. I think I'm going to need your help getting up!"

Both men laughed and getting up gingerly himself Steve helped pull Mike up too. When he had righted Mike, Steve swayed a little as a wave of dizziness washed over him. Mike grabbed Steve's arm and steadied him.

"You ok?"

"Yeah, I'm just a bit light-headed today. Guess I just got up too fast! I'm ok."

"Well you're just out of the hospital. You should be taking it easy."

Then seeing Steve rubbing at his side he inquired again.

"Hows your side?"

"It's sore. I think sitting hunched like that didn't do me much good either."

As Mike stretched his legs carefully to remove the pins and needles that had manifested in them and with Steve holding his side and wincing Mike began to laugh again. Looking curiously at Mike, Steve couldn't help but laugh too at Mike's infectious laughter, and asked through his chuckles.

"What? What are we laughing at?"

"Look at us! Two deadheads just dragging along huh?"

The two men laughed again and then gradually the laughter faded and then carefully stooping and picking up the roses he had left Steve noticed that the vases were already full and addressed Mike again.

"I think I bought too many roses. The yellow ones were her favourite you know? Say, maybe you could put these on Helen's grave seeing as we're here and all?" Steve said handing the roses to Mike. Then he touched Evelyn's picture one more time as if he was saying goodbye.

Mike took the roses and was deeply touched by the young man's offer.

"Thanks buddy boy. I think that's a great idea!"

Then seeing a bench a little way off Steve continued.

"Look there's a bench just over there. I think I'll go and sit down and wait for you over there. Ok?"

As Steve turned to go Mike gently grabbed his arm.

"Why?"

"Well, I thought you might prefer to visit her grave in private ... you know?"

Throwing his arm around Steve's shoulder he chided.

"Steve! Haven't you heard a word that I've said to you? Sometimes we have to do things on our own but sometimes it's nice to have some company too. Would you mind coming with me? I'd appreciate it."

"Sure. I'd be honoured."

And with that Steve smiled at his partner and the two men walked in companionable silence down along the path to the graveside of Helen Stone.


	20. Chapter 20

**Act Of Remembrance **

Chapter 20

Helen's grave was in an older part of the graveyard but by taking a few shortcuts that Mike knew well, it hadn't taken long to get there. Steve stood back a little to give Mike a bit of privacy and watched as the older man carefully placed the roses on Helen's grave. He saw Mike touching the headstone tenderly as he had done with Evelyn's and saw his lips move and figured he was talking to Helen as he had with Evelyn a short while before and felt himself getting upset again. He was glad that this day was nearly over. He felt physically and emotionally drained. He hated feeling this way. Steve always managed to keep his emotions in check and always dealt with his problems in his own way but this time it had all proved too much for him. However he was glad that he had finally been able to talk to Mike. While at first he had been horrified to know that Mike had seen him breakdown the way he had, now it was somehow comforting to know that Mike understood and Mike's wise and comforting words always had a way of making him feel better.

As Steve stood waiting for Mike his side started to hurt again. All the walking he had done had started to take its toll and looking at his watch Steve reckoned that his last painkillers were starting to wear off. Not wanting to disturb the tender scene playing out in front of him Steve kept his growing discomfort to himself. He felt lousy. His eyes felt slightly puffy from the tears he had shed and rubbing at them only seemed to irritate them further. His side had begun to throb mercilessly again and he was feeling slightly unsteady on his feet so he was glad when he saw Mike blessing himself and heading back towards him.

However as soon as Steve started to walk to meet him the throbbing changed to a shooting pain and robbed him of his breath for a few seconds, as he grabbed his injured side and swayed slightly. Seeing Steve's difficulty Mike raced over to where Steve stood and putting an arm around his shoulders he steadied him, looking closely at his partner's pale and pain-filled face.

"Come on. Let's get you back to the church . I shouldn't have made you come with me to Helen's grave. You've already overdone things enough for one day. Can you make it that far with my help?"

"Yeah. I'm ok Mike. I'll make it." and not wanting the older man feeling guilty he added "It wasn't going to Helen's grave that did it. I think the pain meds are just wearing off that's all ! "

Smiling at Steve's thoughtfulness he placed his arm around Steve's waist and put Steve's arm around his shoulders and started guiding him back towards the church. With every step they took Mike felt Steve tense up and knew the young man was in considerable discomfort. He kept a close eye on him as they walked and saw beads of sweat break out on the younger man's forehead as he struggled to walk with the pain. While he marvelled at the way Steve managed not to make any sound that would give away the amount of pain he was in he also wished sometimes that he would feel easier about verbally expressing himself and wondered what kind of childhood the young man had that would cause him to be so guarded where his feelings were concerned. Mike determined in that moment to eventually break through that bad habit of his no matter how long it took!

As the church came into view, Steve let out a sigh of relief when he saw a bench a little way off that he could finally use to take some weight off his injured side. The sigh was not lost on Mike and following Steve's gaze he saw the bench and figured out Steve's desired destination.

"Can you make it to that bench buddy boy? You're looking a little flaky. You're not going to pass out on me again are you?" Mike asked worried about the pallor of his partner's face.

"No ... no I'm not going to pass out. Don't worry. I just need to sit down for a little while and take some painkillers."

"Do you have them with you?"

"Yeah. They're in my jacket pocket. I just need some water to wash them down with."

They reached the bench and Mike sat him down carefully. Sherry came around the corner just at the moment. She had been waiting in the church as Mike had requested but when neither one had returned and the church had emptied of people she had decided to come outside and look around instead.

"Mike! You found him!" she shouted out but as she hurried towards them Steve's pallor and his pained expression frightened her. "Oh my God! Is he ok Mike?"

Mike who was standing in front of Steve and loosening his tie looked up at Sherry.

"He's ok Sherry. He's just not up to this much after only leaving the hospital this morning and he needs his pain meds. Could you please get us a glass of water?"

Mike's request wasn't heard by Sherry who was staring at Steve with great concern on her face seemingly lost in her own thoughts. Mike's eyes looked between Steve who was resting his head on the back of the bench with his eyes shut tight and holding his side tightly and the young woman who was standing watching him and realized in that moment that Steve wasn't the only one who was traumatized by the events of the previous year. So placing a gentle hand on Sherry's shoulder which brought her out of her trance as she looked at him, he spoke softly.

"I tell you what. Why don't you keep an eye on Steve for me while I go get him a glass of water to take his pain meds with. Ok?"

"Sure ... sure Mike. I'll watch him." Sherry replied shakily as she sat down beside Steve and took his hand in hers.

"Steve! I'll be right back ok? Sherrys here. I'm just going to get you some water. Hold on now buddy boy."

Then looking at Sherry he smiled.

"He's in your hands now until I get back!"

"I got it Mike." Sherry replied smiling back.

Knowing that he was leaving Steve in good hands, Mike left them and headed up the steps into the church but before he entered he looked back at the two young people on the bench with fatherly concern and hoped that the two friends could somehow help each other through their heartache. Then he headed inside towards the sacristy in search of a glass of water.

After Mike left, Sherry squeezed Steve's hand and brushed his hair from his face with her other hand. This made Steve open his eyes and seeing Sherry he smiled and saw the worry in her face.

"Hey I'm ok. Don't look so worried. I just need some painkillers. That's all."

But then seeing something bothering the young woman he momentarily forgot his own discomfort and sitting up a little he squeezed her hand back and questioned her softly.

"Hey. Sherry, what's the matter? Are you ok?"

"Oh Steve!" Sherry exclaimed and unexpectedly burst out crying, threw her arms around him and laid her head on his chest.

Steve hadn't expected that reaction and worried about Sherry even more. Pulling her closer and stroking her hair he spoke sympathetically to the young woman.

"Hey, hey now. I know, believe me I know. Today has been tough. Do you want to talk about it? I'm a good listener you know."

Sherry lifted her head and releasing Steve she sat up and rummaged in her bag for a tissue. She dried her eyes and looked at Steve slightly embarrassed by her outburst.

"I'm sorry Steve. It's just that I miss her you know? And I've ... well I've been having awful nightmares about that night. I keep seeing him standing in my bath tub. The way he looked at me Steve. I thought you had gone. If you hadn't seen his car and come back that night ... well ... he would have ... Oh Steve, this service could have easily been for me too." and with that Sherry started to sob heartily again.

Steve felt so sorry for Sherry and pulling her into a hug again he held her tight and felt his own emotions becoming frayed again too.

"Hey, hey I know. I ... I've been having nightmares too ..." Steve admitted shakily.

Sherry lifted her head again and looked at him sympathetically. That was the last thing she had expected Steve to say. He always gave the impression that he could cope with anything and never showed his true feelings but now seeing the hurt in his eyes, he was displaying a side of him that she had never witnessed before.

"You've been having nightmares too?" she asked almost incredulously.

"Yeah ...not so much about that night but ... about Evelyn. She's usually someplace where I can't get to her and she's calling me ... He's with her and I want to help her but I can't ... and then she asks me where I was and ... why I didn't ... try to save her ..."

Steve couldn't say anymore as his voice broke and tears ran down his cheek. Tears ran down her cheek too as she listened to Steve's tormented dreams and grabbing his hand once more and seeing how upset he was gave her the inner strength she needed to help him.

"Steve! You weren't responsible for what happened to her! Oren Prentiss was! Evelyn knows that. She knows you would have done anything in your power to save her if you'd had the chance. You saved me! I can't ever thank you enough for that. If you hadn't been there ... Steve, we both have to let it go. We can't go on torturing ourselves like this. What happened, happened. Nothing you and I can do will change the past."

Steve rubbed the tears from his face and cleared his throat.

"I know. That's what Mike said. I just wish ... I'd been able to save you both. I loved her Sherry."

As a new tear fell from his eye Sherry reached up and brushed it away with her fingertips and looking closely into his eyes.

"I know you did. And I know it's hard. I loved her too ... but we have her in on our hearts and our memories Steve and no-one can take her away from us there. She'll always be with us. She'll give us the strength we need to go on."

Steve nodded sadly and then they hugged each other again this time causing Steve to wince and groan as his side protested.

"Oh God I'm sorry Steve. Did I hurt you?"

"No ...no it's ok. I wonder what's taking Mike so long?"

Actually Mike had fetched the water quite quickly but as he returned through the porch he'd heard Sherry and Steve talking about their nightmares. Torn between not wanting to listen to their conversation sneakily and not wanting to interrupt them from confiding in each other Mike had decided that letting them share their pain would be far more therapeutic for them both so he had stayed in the porch waiting for an opportune moment to reappear to them. Hearing the bad dreams that both of them had been having and the touching conversation they were having brought a lump to Mike's throat and a tear or two to his eye too. He cared about the pair of them and wished that there was some way he could take away the pain that was haunting them both. Instead all he could do for now was let them talk it out and be there for them whenever they needed him to be. Casting his eyes up to heaven Mike whispered shakily.

"I'm sorry too Evelyn. I was in charge. I should have let Steve drive you home that night and made sure you were safe. I'll always regret that. Please, forgive me and help them Evelyn. Please. They both need you."

Just then he heard Steve's groan and heard him asking where he was and he knew it was his cue to resurface so taking his ever-present handkerchief from his pocket he wiped his eyes quickly and hurried down the steps and back towards his partner and Sherry.


	21. Chapter 21

**Act Of Remembrance **

Chapter 21 :The Epilogue

In the few moments it took Mike to reach the bench Steve was bent over and in a bad way. Sherry was worried and looked at Mike anxiously.

"Mike, he's in a lot of pain!"

"Alright now. Steve! Which pocket are your painkillers in?"

Steve went to try to get them from his front right pocket but the stabbing pain struck him again and stopped him.

"It's ok now. Take it easy. I'll get them."

Finding the pills Mike quickly read the label which read "take one to two pills depending on the severity of the pain". Looking up and seeing the agony on the younger man's face he reckoned that two was required in this instance and taking two from the tablet bottle he put them in Steve's hand along with the glass of water.

"Down the hatch buddy boy. You'll feel better when they kick in."

Steve dutifully took the pills and swallowed them down but it took a half an hour before Steve started to feel the benefit of them and the pain in his side reduced to a dull ache. All that time, Mike and Sherry stayed with him talking to him and trying to take his mind off the pain. As the colour started to come back into his face a little and he seemed to be more comfortable, Mike spoke first.

"Is it feeling better now?"

"Yeah ... thanks. To both of you. And sorry for causing so much trouble."

"No trouble buddy boy. You forget. I know what that pain was like! The trick is to take the pain killers BEFORE the pain gets that bad! Ok?"

"Yeah. Don't worry. I've learnt my lesson."

"Good. You better let me take a quick look at that wound just to make sure it's ok though."

Mike lifted Steve's shirt and just barely opened the dressing and was satisfied that it looked ok. Steve only flinched a little and Sherry winced in sympathy at Steve's injury. Then having put it back in place and studying Steve closely for any further signs of discomfort and finding none Mike unexpectedly clapped his hands together startling Steve and Sherry.

"Say. I've got a great idea. Now that you are starting to look human again Steve why don't I treat us all to a slap up meal in Mamma's. What do you both say? Huh?" Mike asked enthusiastically ."It's just what we all need."

Sherry smiled at the older man's enthusiasm and joined in.

"Sounds good to me. I'm starving. What do you say Steve?" and they both looked expectantly at the younger man.

Steve was less enthusiastic. While the pain in his side was now bearable he was feeling very tired, his appetite still wasn't great and the upset of the whole afternoon had drained him of any enthusiasm he had left. However with both friends staring pleadingly at him he didn't want to be the spoil sport so he reluctantly agreed.

"Ok ... I'm with you guys but I'm not that hungry. Ok?"

Sherry looked pleased and Mike was glad too that the young man had agreed so readily. For a second or two there, he was convinced that Steve was going to say no.

"Ok. You're with us but you're not that hungry. So you can get something easy on your stomach. One of those salad things you normally get maybe? Sherry! Did you drive here?"

"No I got a taxi."

Steve joined the conversation. "Me too!"

"Good then that's settled. I'll drive. Can you walk to the car park or do you need me to fetch the car Steve?"

"No. I can walk now. It's ok."

So they walked slowly to Mike's car with Mike and Sherry staying either side of Steve just in case and drove to Mamma's. They got there at about seven and the three enjoyed a pleasant meal together. The conversation mainly consisted of each of them regaling stories about Evelyn and by eight thirty the three companions had finished their meal. Steve had even managed to eat most of the chicken salad he had ordered much to Mike and Sherry's delight. Steve stayed with soda water as a drink considering the strong pain killers he was on but at the end of the meal Sherry raised her glass of wine and spoke.

"If you gentlemen don't mind I'd like to propose a toast. To Evelyn. A very special person. Always in our hearts. Never forgotten! May she rest in peace and know that we will always love her!" Sherry's voice broke slightly as she finished the toast and Mike watched Steve closely as he raised his glass too and spoke shakily.

"To Evelyn. That was beautiful Sherry. Thank you."

Sherry smiled at Steve as they exchanged a look of mutual loss and understanding and together the three friends drank the toast.

Mike continued to watch his young partner as he wiped his mouth with his napkin and looked very tired and emotionally drained. As he rubbed his eyes wearily Sherry and Mike exchanged a worried glance and Mike took control once more of the evening.

"You look fit to drop buddy boy. Let's call it a night shall we? I'll drive you both home."

Steve never objected which almost worried Mike even more but they both thanked him for the lovely meal. Then he paid the bill and soon they had driven to Sherry's house. She had moved from the apartment shortly after the incident last year and had moved back home to her parent's house. Somehow it had helped and made her feel safe again. As they pulled up outside, Steve had insisted on walking her to her door. As they reached the house a grey haired man appeared at the window, pulled the curtain aside and waved out at them. Both Steve and Sherry waved back and then looking embarrassed Sherry looked back at Steve.

"That's my Dad. He's a little over protective of me since ... well you know. I know it's pretty lame moving back home but it's only temporary until I get another place of my own. For the moment it just helps ... you know?"

"It's not lame. I understand. I'm just glad you have someone looking out for you."

"Listen Steve, thanks for listening today. You know talking about Evelyn really helped."

"Yeah. I know what you mean. Thank you too. Are you going to be ok?"

"Yeah ... I think so" and taking his hand in hers she squeezed it and asked "How about you?"

Steve smiled at her.

"Yeah. I'll be ok and if I'm not I have a guardian angel of my own too" Steve said nodding towards Mike and laughing.

Sherry smiled and continued.

"Say Steve, don't be a stranger ok? Call me sometime and we'll do lunch or just grab a coffee. And if you ever need to talk about ... Evelyn. I'm here for you. Ok?"

Steve felt the lump return to his throat and he was touched by her kind offer. Swallowing hard he squeezed her hand and answered shakily.

"Thanks! I'm here for you too. I'll call you. I promise. You take care of yourself Sherry."

"You too." and affectionately Sherry kissed him on the cheek and they said their goodbyes.

Steve made his way slowly back down the steps and sat back into the car and looking back up at the house they both waved up at Sherry as she stood at her front door and watched as she waved back and went inside. Then they drove off towards Union Street.

As Mike drove he kept a casual eye on Steve who looked very thoughtful. Breaking the silence Mike spoke.

"Do you think Sherry will be ok?"

"Yeah. I think so. She'll be fine. It's a tough one but Sherry's coped with a lot worse in her life. She's a fighter. She'll make it."

"Yeah you're right. She has and she will." Then again he looked over at Steve and tentatively added. "How about you buddy boy? Are you gonna make it?"

Smiling over at his mentor and partner Steve answered.

"Yeah. I'll make it. Thanks for today Mike. What you said. It helped. I appreciate you being there and I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about it sooner. It's been a crazy few days. Huh?"

"I'll say. Are you sure you don't want to stay at my place for a few days just until you're feeling a little better? The spare room is always there if you want it you know."

"I know it is Mike and I appreciate the offer but I just need some time to work things out in my head. I'd rather just stay at my place if you don't mind. But don't worry. I'll be ok."

"Ok buddy boy. If that's what you want."

And with that they pulled up outside 287 Union Street.

Steve turned to Mike.

"You know Mike there's one thing that's been bothering me. You know that homeless guy we found the other night in the alleyway. Well nobody's claimed the body. Maybe we should try to find his family. You know, so he can get a proper burial. I mean he must be someone's son or brother or husband. Maybe I could make a few phone calls? See what I can find out."

Again Mike was amazed at how throughout his own troubles Steve always thought of other people and once again his heart swelled with pride.

"Hey hang on now. You're on sick leave remember? You're just going to take it easy for a few days and get that side of yours better. Ok? However it's a nice thought buddy boy. I'll get Lee and Bill to look into it tomorrow. Oh and I forgot to tell you Nelson called me this morning at the office and said that the same gun used on Garcia killed Gonzalez. Looks like you got a double murderer off the streets. You did a fine job on that case all things considered Steve."

Again hating fuss Steve brushed off the praise just as Mike knew he would.

"Well I could have avoided getting shot and dangling from a seven storey building in the process."

"Well we live and learn buddy boy. Don't we?"

"Yeah I guess. Oh Mike. I almost forgot. Mrs Sanchez' granddaughter came to the hospital today to see me. She gave us both a gift from her grandmother. Here's yours!" and reaching gingerly into his inside pocket he produced the small box that Maria Sanchez had given him and handed it to Mike.

Mike took the box and carefully opened it and took from it a round beaded metal ring with a cross at one end. He smiled at it and sat admiring it for a few seconds.

"She said it was a rosary ring." Steve added.

"I know. I've seen them before. It was very thoughtful of her."

"She said that her grandmother sensed that you were a man of God and that you'd appreciate it."

"Oh she did , did she?" Mike beamed proudly. " Nice lady that Mrs Sanchez. What did she give you?"

Again reaching into his pocket he produced the metal charm and showed Mike.

"It's a good luck charm. She called it a ... Oh what was it called again?"

"A Milagros?" Mike offered.

"Yeah that was it. How did you know that?"

"Oh I've seen a few in my day. Some people even believe that they can heal you too. Better keep it with you Steve. It just might do you some good. You never know."

After both men had put away their respective gifts Steve opened the car door to exit when Mike grabbed his arm and stopped him.

"Hey listen Steve. You know you said something to me once when we hadn't been working together that long. You said that you were with me, anytime, anywhere but you had to know what I was doing! Do you remember?"

Steve nodded.

"Yeah, sure I do. It was at the hospital after Gus was shot. Why?"

"Because I want you to know the reverse is true too. I'm with you too. Anytime, anywhere. You just have to tell me what's going on in your head and I'll be there for you aswell. You know that don't you buddy boy?"

Steve was very touched by Mike's words and felt his emotions threaten to overwhelm him again. Patting Mike's arm, Steve smiled at his partner and answered.

"Yeah I know that. Point taken. Thanks Mike. That means a lot."

"Things will work out Steve. Mark my words!" Then patting Steve on the knee he continued " Ok. I'll call you tomorrow. Take it easy now, get some rest and take those painkillers regularly until that heals. You hear me now?"

Steve smiled as Mike reverted back to protective father mode.

"Ok. I will. I promise. I'll see you."

"And call me if you need anything!"

"I will Mike. Honest. Bye. And thanks for everything."

With that Steve got out and waved as Mike beeped the horn and drove off and Steve made his way wearily up the steps to his apartment. As he reached his front door he stopped momentarily and holding the rail he turned and looked towards the bay. The sun was just setting and the sunset glowed orange. It was a beautiful sight and Steve stood admiring it for a few moments. The fresh sea breeze felt refreshing and Steve breathed it into his lungs.

Finally tiredness took its toll and he turned back towards his door and reached into his trouser pocket for his house keys. As he took them out of his pocket, they slipped from his fingers and fell. Forgetting his injury for a split second he bent quickly to try to catch them as they fell but regretted it instantly as his side spasmed and he stood back up and watched helplessly as they fell down the first few steps.

"Great! Nice one Steve!" he chastised himself and leaned back against the rail and tried to breathe through the pain reverberating through his side but before he had a chance to do anything else a voice spoke from the pavement below.

"Oh, let me get those for you! "

Looking down below to where the voice was coming from he saw Mrs Peterson's granddaughter coming up the steps and picking up his keys, she brought them up to where he was. However when Steve saw her his heart skipped a beat. In her left hand she was holding a bunch of yellow roses!

"Thanks ... Nice flowers!" he stammered as she handed him his keys.

"You're welcome. Yes, they're beautiful aren't they? They're my favourite. My grandmother is coming home from hospital tomorrow. I thought they might brighten up the place for when she gets home."

Then seeing Steve holding his side and looking as pale as a ghost the young woman became alarmed and reached out to touch his arm.

"Are you ok? You look very pale. What's the matter?"

Thinking about what Mike had said about Evelyn giving him a sign and seeing this young lady holding Evelyn's favourite flowers had stunned Steve for a minute and between that and his side hurting like it was, Steve suddenly felt very dizzy. Breaking out in a cold sweat Steve staggered a little and immediately Rachel Peterson flew into action.

"You're not ok are you? Come on. Let's get you inside."

Taking the keys from his hand she opened Steve's front door and leaving the roses outside on the doorstep she put Steve's arm around her shoulders and guided him inside and sat him down on his couch. Then she ran into the kitchen and poured a glass of cold water and hurried back to him with it.

"Here take a few sips of this. Slowly now."

Taking the glass, Steve shakily took a few sips and felt slightly better. Feeling more embarrassed than anything else Steve blushed and tried to explain.

"Sorry about that. I had a slight altercation with a speeding bullet yesterday evening and I came off second best. Bending to try to catch the keys when they fell was NOT a good decision."

"Oh my! That's awful. You were shot!" Rachel asked horrified.

"No. It's not that bad, just a flesh wound. I'm ok really. Thanks for your help."

"Sure. I guess they're the hazards of your profession huh?"

"Yeah, something like that." Then trying to change the subject he inquired how Rachel's grandmother was doing.

"Oh she's doing much better thanks. Her ankle is on the mend but she'll be using a stick for a little while. She just can't wait to get out of the hospital. I'm picking her up tomorrow at four."

"Your grandmother told me you two had settled your differences."

"Yes! Thanks to you I guess I saw things from her point of view. I can see now why she wants to stay here and I'm going to visit her more often and help her out more when I can. You know I never really got to thank you properly for helping her like you did. I'm going to make a casserole tomorrow for her coming home. If you're free and you're feeling up to it I'd love if you could join us for dinner tomorrow evening just as a thank you."

Steve glanced over at a picture of Evelyn he had out on his hall table and thought again about what Mike had said and then he thought of the possible significance of the yellow roses and smiling at the young lady in front of him he finally answered.

"Sure. That would be great. I'd love to come. Thank you."

"Great! Say about eight?"

"Eight it is."

"Ok. I better go. Are you sure you're ok now?"

"Yes thank you. I'm fine. Let me see you out."and with that Rachel left Steve's apartment and Steve stood at the door while she picked up the roses and made her way downstairs. Suddenly remembering something Steve called after her.

"Say I don't think I ever got your first name?"

"Rachel."

"Rachel. That's a nice name. You can call me Steve."

"Ok Steve. Listen, I'm staying downstairs tonight just getting the flat ready so if you need anything just shout. Ok? See you tomorrow!"

"Ok. Thanks again."

Steve watched as Rachel Peterson went back downstairs and then headed back inside and closing the door he leaned back against the inside of the door and thought about what had just happened.

Then he walked to the hall table and picking up Evelyn's picture he touched it tenderly. Placing it back down carefully he went into the living room and took off his jacket and tie and discarded them on the chair as was his habit. Then feeling suddenly very tired he picked up the glass of water and got his pain killers and the Milagros out of his jacket pocket. Taking them with him, he passed through the hall and stopping to pick up Evelyn's picture again he brought all four items with him into the bedroom. Carefully placing all four things on his bedside locker he very carefully lay down on his bed and holding his side carefully he turned on his side gingerly and stared at Evelyn's picture. Had it really been a sign from Evelyn or just a coincidence. Steve lay there wondering as he felt his eyelids grow heavy. He was almost drifting off to sleep when the phone suddenly rang. Reaching up drowsily Steve picked up the receiver and brought it down to his ear.

"Yeah. Hello? Mike! I should have guessed. Yes. Yes I'm in bed now. I was just about to go to sleep. Yes Mike, I brought my painkillers in with me. I feel fine. MIKE! I'll call you tomorrow! Ok? Alright. Thanks for the call. Goodnight."

Shaking his head and smiling to himself at Mike's phone call Steve settled back into his pillow and looked once more up at Evelyn's picture. He didn't know exactly why but he felt better. He didn't feel as distraught as earlier. Actually he felt blessed. Blessed to have so many people who cared about him. Blessed to have known Evelyn even if fate meant it had only been for a short time. Picking up the Milagros he placed it under his pillow and for the first time in the last five days he wasn't afraid of what sleep would bring. Smiling again at Evelyn's picture he whispered.

"Sleep well sweetheart."

And then closing his eyes he quickly drifted off into a peaceful sleep and wondered what tomorrow would bring.

**The End.**

**A/N : Well that's another story completed! I want to thank sincerely those who encouraged me to write it, those who read it, and all those who commented or reviewed it. Your kind words are deeply appreciated more than you will ever know. Until I get to write the next one I hope you have all enjoyed it and I wish you all the best.**


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